How To Build A Universe That Doesn't Fall Apart Two Days Later — an essay by Philip K. Dick. more inside

Every Damn Blog Post.... What the heck. Nobody's reading shawnj's pussy post anymore.

Turkmenbashi.org and the Turkmenbashi cult. For those in the know, and those who don't even want to know, here it is. more inside

Man telephones his own funeral

A terrifying journey into the twisted world of my breakfast cereal. Today, while eating the cereal in question, I noticed that on the back of the box, there is a picture of this man. "That's strange," I thought, then, "to the internet!" I did a bit of digging, and found out that the man pictured is the leader of this group. And then it gets creepy. more inside

Sweet Jesus, I hate Bill O'Reilly, International

Viral Marketing, Republican Style Ahhh, the rich irony. Seen this photo yet? It was one of Yahoo's most mailed yesterday, the topic of this and this post on Mefi. Now, you might be thinking: "poor mr. Parlock and his daughter-what meanies those Kerry supporters are!" Well sir (or madam), you've been punk'd.

So, we've dealt with the bike. What about a helmet? Personally, I say yes. more inside

Curious George: Spies everywhere? At a recent meeting, my boss said They are monitoring internet usage. I vaguely know there's stuff out there that can do this, but I avail myself of the vast technological expertise of the Monkeys: Is there a way I can tell if They really are doing this?? Many thanks...

So this is freedom? more inside

Freud & Cocaine - nosecandy & neurology - sometimes you hear people talking about Sigmund Freud, the 'father of psychoanalysis', being a big-time blow buff. A fanatic for foo-foo, a lover of lines, an afficionado of Aunt Nora. So what's the deal? Did he really snort a lot of the Bolivian marching powder, or did I dream it? Toot toot!! from the 'clearing out my old bookmarks' dept.

Iraq had no WMD Stockpiles or so says Charles Duelfer, head of the Iraq Survey Group. How do we monkeys think this news will affect the coming polls in Australia and the US?

Homeless use Internet to be connected Since Forks is plugging his media exposure I thought I do the same. I did a 15 minute telephone interview for this article and I'm in one paragraph. So there isn't really much about me (except my real name) in it.

For when even a Hummer can't compensate for your small penis. From International, makers of tow trucks, buses and semis comes latest utility vehicle: the seven ton CXT. I'll take 2!

It's Monkey Week at Engrish.com more inside

Air Force had top-secret plans to nuke Moon. (No, not that Moon.)

Transoceanic cables. Once proclaimed the eighth wonder of the world but now largely forgotten, transoceanic cables did more to shrink the world than anything else. Read about the Herculean efforts that went into the first Atlantic cable. Then check out the great links, maps, and more. Listen to the Ocean Telegraph March and other inspired tunes. Even nowadays, transcontinental cables are high-tech, with fiber-optic lines piping the Internet through the oceanic abyss.

Curious George: "A guy grabbed me by the arm, he looked me right in the eye, and he said, 'Don't let me down.'" This has been an applause line in Bush's stump speech for months, but something finally sunk in: if anyone really said this, that person's probably still around. How can I find him, and has President Bush let him down?

European cigarette commercials British American Tobacco hired American film directors to do commercials for them. The directors include the Coen Bros. and Roman Polanski. via Waxy

No thanks, I'll just walk.