Zombie Cockroaches! Run For Your Feeble Lives!... Insects are fucking bananas and likely our future imperious masters. You may cry now.

"I probably do need some help, but I don't know if this is the time or place for it." Some boldfaced text, and the general tone, NSFW. Unless you work in animal husbandry. Via Thesmokinggun.

Bush bests Monroe, threatens Jefferson.

The Food Sphinx. For when you've done the food pyramid and are still feeling a bit peckish...

Anonymous George: A Friend in Need A close friend of mine seems to have gotten himself into a spot of trouble, and I'm not sure how involved I should get, because part of the trouble involves another close friend. Please bear with me while I fill in the backstory. more inside

Curious George: Cell long distance (U.S.) Just a dumb question but do most people signed up with major cell providers in the U.S. get free long distance? I'm setting up a temporary number for cell phone clients and am not sure if a 1-800 number would be redundant.

Ivor Cutler has passed away at age 83. One of Scotland's best poets, he was also a musician, singer, songwriter, actor, painter, author of books for children, and humorist. He recorded more sessions with John Peel than anyone but The Fall. Maybe you remember him as Buster Bloodvessel from The Magical Mystery Tour? more inside

Why aren't you using RSS? A n00b's guide to RSS. You have a ton of sites bookmarked. You may have whittled down to a list of, oooh, a number that you check every day (/presses envelope to head - that number is six!). RSS is a way you can be MORE in touch — with a higher number of sites — while doing less work. And, thus, an aid to becoming fatter, lazier and inevitably uglier, as if that were even possible. This is me pretending that I've not heard of RSS. Of course, I'm really much hipper than that, and this is all old news. Also, I didn't search before posting. more inside

PLEASE take my Jesus plates. I have a set of 6 "Faces of Jesus Collector's Plates" and I believe they are ruining my life. WARNING: contains Craigslist

So there you are, just enjoying a nice day out kayaking.

Nuclear Weapon Effects Calculator Try [FAS's] NEW Bomb-A-City Calculator. Pick an American city. Pick the size of the bomb you wish to detonate virtually (1 kt to 4 MT). Choose your method of delivery (aircraft or automobile/suitcase). Then see the radius within which most buildings would be destroyed. Then, measure the potential fallout. Both tools have handy keys at the bottom. Don't get caught in the blue! more inside

Natalie Portman Gangsta Style On SNL she speaks of her gangsta lifestyle. Watch out....this girl is a crazy B*tch!

Pets or Food? 40 lbs. baby seal meat for only 68.99$US. Mmm! Plus recipes like Sweet and Sour Koala Loaf. This might be a joke.

Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt!! The name Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt was an inevitable afterthought. When Steven Seagal finished creating a drink that holds untold natural power, there was only one equivalent in nature- The Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt. Both mysterious and powerful, it's a symbol of the untold energy the earth has to offer- Such is Steven Seagals Lightning Bolt energy drink. more inside

Nacho Libre Jack Black is one of those actors who is excruciatingly annoying if in the wrong role (Orange County), or stupidly-hilarious if in the right one (School of Rock). Enter "Nacho Libre" -- Jack plays a priest who becomes a Mexican wrestler in order to save the orphanage. more inside

Unexpected Comet Pojamanski is visible for Northern monkeys. It has a pretty turquoise tail. It needs a pretty name, however.

Fascism Checklist See how many apply to your country. Discuss. No, no I mean in the thread. Discuss it in the thread here. Also, there are some Boob videos. Probably SFW, but I'm going to mark them as NSFW just in case more inside

Nessie is really Dumbo claims Neil Clark, curator of palaeontology at Glasgow University's Hunterian Museum. "Ya pure mad dafty!" cry Scotland's Tourism Industry and the many believers of the legend of the Loch Ness monster. more inside

Cleveland Meetup Pics ... are here and here and here.

Real Life Simpsons Intro (Embedded Video). Via digg, via Layer 8. more inside