Alternative Chinese Zodiac Put down that Cockpunch and pick up a Coke. Monkey? How about Twinkie? I am a Donut, which explains my fear of Homer Simpson.
thanks, PreSurfer

Mad Props from MeFi and the NZ Herald. In print but not online? Got a copy, tracicle?

I've been waiting for somebody else to post this... (via MeFi) Apparently armies of squid are advancing on California. They've even found ways to get inland. AND now, they've got night lights (and just read what they use to make them - yuck!). Even The New Yorker has noticed something. THEY'RE TAKING OVER THE WORLD!!!

I am shocked, SHOCKED, that nobody has posted this here before. (Via MeFi) more inside

The Fridge (via here, and previously mentioned here) is an on-line version of Magnetic Letters (without the collaborative interference). What I like about it is the ability to import text from a webpage to create your own word set. Here's what I did with the MonkeyFilter 'Recent Comments' sidebar.

More Moore, Moran Those GOPers and Cons who believed that Michael Moore would explode/kill himself if Bush won are sorely disappointed. In fact, MM has just aanounced plans for a "Fahrenheit 9/11" sequel. But "Fahrenheit 9/11 1/2" sounds kinda lame. Anybody have an idea for a better title?

Win a Date With Curious George: Okay, I haven't been out as part of a couple since my ex-marriage started falling apart, and I've got two tickets to a screening tomorrow of Johnny Depp's "Finding Neverland". more inside

Enquiring George: Who's the Most Overrated in Show Biz?
FULL DISCLOSURE: This is research for an article I'm writing; usually I don't reach out for other opinions, but the subject is so general... I'm not looking for the latest teen-queen-lip-syncher or reality-show-hunk; I'm looking for actors, singers, comedians, "personalities", even writer/creators who have had long successful careers in spite of an obvious lack of real talent. I'm thinking William Shatner (YMMV), but I could go as young as Ben Affleck. No dead people, please.

Prepare for Deluge... Between now and Monday, expect MeFi the MotherFu...Ship to be in drydock being retrofitted with new warpdrives and fuzzy dice. During that time, expect many visits from jonesing MeFites seeking a fix for their Filter Addictions. Please conduct yourselves appropriately. more inside

O'Reilly Competitor Offers to Buy O'Reilly/Mackris Tapes to Prevent Them From Being Destroyed! A vital action to save history from a permanent cover-up? An abdication of journalistic integrity? A publicity stunt for a show with one-eighth the audience of Bill O's? A major act of snarkiness from a newbie journo-blogger? Or just another reason Olbermann never should've quit doing sports?
This post: CableNewsFilter? PepsiBlueState? SchadenfreudianSlip? JournalisticSharkJump? Or the most important story you'll see on MoFi this weekend?

The Henry Ford Letterman Top 10 (in association with Casey KAOL)...
The ten most influencial innovations of the past 75 years. Remember this is based on a poll of AOL users which explains Air Conditioning, Penicillin and Personal Computers as the top 3, but Global Positioning #4?!?

Un-F**k You! Metrosexuality is out. Asexuality is in. more inside

E-L-E-P-H-A-N-T-S Elephants, lovely elephants! Put heavy anthropomorphic nonsense to shame. Every lumbering elephantine pachaderm has a noticable trunk seperation. Enough lame elephant posts! Has anyone noticed this silliness? Extroverted, lusty elephants play harmonicas and never tootle saxophones. Electric Light Elephants play haphazardly, are no talent screwballs. European lowland elephants prance happily around tolerant Switzerland. Elephants like enthusiastic parades, harmonicas and nas, tempting silliness. Every little elephant prefers having aligators nearby than skunks. Elegant ladies eating pods harness a nimbose, teleportation syrup. Easy loving elk prowl, horny and needing to screw. Elephants: loathsome ending. Police hang a nordic, techno songstress. E-L-E-P-H-A-N-T-S Everybody likes extreme political harassment against neoconservative trolls, seriously! more inside

See? They still know how to have fun at MeFi... Warning: Contains SPOILERS, lots and lots of SPOILERS! more inside

Swift Boats Speak Out! You can stop waiting for the perfect response to the "Swift Boat Veterens". It's Swift Boats for Truth. Aw, isn't "Swiffie" cute (and doesn't "Karl the Pig" look familiar)?

Google Poetry The next step in artistic de-humanization, via MeanyFilter

All Hail Kobayashi, the Hot Dog King! 53½ wieners in 12 minutes... a world record. Let's see Turkmenbashi do something like that! more inside

Monkey Productions Presents: 20 Questions About the Candidates
I got 19 out of 20. Yay me. via Presurfer

We All Hate Mondays... This is the best explaination for Garfield ever.

So, you've got a News Satire site, and you want to get some attention. What do you do? What do you do? Attack the Onion, of course. please beleive me that I have no vested interest in promoting this site. Honest. Really!