My god is that really all there is to this game? When I was like 9-10 I spent WAY too much time trying to win! WAY WAY too much time. I'm still in awe of how simple it was. Wow. It's like seeing a childhood hero and realizing he is just another man.
Although on the plus side I finally beat it! Whoo!
Except for I just realized how old you are which means some of those steps might have to be skipped.
You can also go with playing really depressing or angry music really fucking loudly and driving around aimlessly. But make sure you have someone with you when you do that. Trust me it is better that way.
Call your best friends. Tell them that you don't care what they are doing with their Friday night, you just got broken up with so they better get their butts over to your place. Make them go drinking with you. Get sloppy drunk. Say a lot of things you'd never normally get away with saying. Throw up. Get taken home and don't remember getting in bed. Wake up around 2pm feeling like shit with a bunch of answering machine messages from the above mentioned friends hoping you made it through the night without any alcohol related incidents.
From there you are on your own, but the above seems to be my modus operandi.
I apologize if I come across as an ass in this post. The problem with discussing this kind of stuff, especially not face to face, is it is really hard not to sound like I'm just whining about how noone understands me or how I'm so different from everyone else so *pout*! That's not my intention at all and if you do read that into my comments I'd appreciate it if the conversation continue either here or via email. I'm pretty bad about articulating myself sometimes, and my natural reaction is just to stay quiet instead of being understood. Ok... disclaimers out of the way, so here we go.
I think the problem comes from looking at sexual identity* as a one diminutional graph. We label one end straight, the other gay and say "this area on the graph is het, this here in the middle is het, and here we have gay." But sexuality doesn't always work that way. It's some big multi-dimensional mess, although one that often can be simplified into a pretty decent one
I know gay men who are willing to admit full well there are women they have/want to sleep with. But somehow that doesn't make them lose gayness. I know lesbian women (some raging bull dyke oh my god there is no way you are going to confuse them for straight even) who have slept with men after coming out.
But somehow being a straight man means no other dicks allowed.. Touch, taste, fuck, hell even jerk off around one, and boom. You Are Bisexual (or for some people, You Are Gay). Why is that?
And yes, some men are simply gay and in denial. You don't need to tell me that. And there are also gay men out there who have the whole "I'm gay but don't agree with the gay lifestyle" chip on their shoulders. I'm asking you to trust me when I say I'm neither of those.
Despite the best attempts of reactionaries to stuff it back in, the sexual cat (here pussy pussy pussy**) is out of the bag, and it sure as hell ain't going back in. I really think that in a few generations this kind of conversation is going to seem oh so quaint and ignorant. These sorts of issues will be understood, with terms that have evolved as understanding grows. Getting there is not going to be a simple process, there will be plenty of missteps along the way, but don't please don't close your mind and refuse to accept that understood or not, these complexities exist.
* I want to go on the record as saying I HATE THIS TERM. I know I've been using it a lot but I still hate it.
** Sorry.
ThRoach: Yes it can have shades of homophobia, but it doesn't have to. Oh and I'm amused you chose heterosexual as the word to hold onto. While I call myself straight, I sure as hell don't say that I'm hetero. So many terms; so confusing.
Bernockle: at the risk of sounding like a typical whiny bisexual, sex just isn't that simple. I'm sure if I was versed in sexual/gender theory I could give you better words to use, but I'm not, sorry. I do, however, know that just throwing one shade of grey into your black and white world does not really help much.
I will say this though. As someone who has spent a good chunk of his life defining my own sexual identity, saying "you are bisexual, accept it" comes across as simpleminded and arrogant.
As a straight man who has in the past (and may well in the future) had boyfriends some even long term, I find it funny how many people out there refuse to think that straight men can fool around with other men. Lots of straight women have fooled around with other women, why can't straight guys fool around with other men? (Although to be fair, there are plenty of women out there who will kiss or pet another woman just because guys think it is hot. But I'm not talking about stuff like that.)
I've been in this situation and the relationship did a spectacular job of ending miserably. However, a couple years down the line we were able to be pretty good friends again. In some ways even closer friends than before, but there is still a bit of tension that makes get things awkward. You aren't going to be friends again any time soon, but end things soon, end them without being an ass and maybe, especially if you keep in touch with you mutual acquaintances, she will want to revive the friendship some years down the line.
Wow, now where can I buy some? (shouldn't too hard considering I live a few miles from 3 of those breweries.) I've been sad that, as I am boycotting the south and all things I know of that are made there for the net 4 years, I had to switch from American whiskey to scotch. Granted I like a good scotch, but still I was sad.
kmellis: yeah I agree with you about the homosexual sleeping with the opposite sex thing (and the straights sleeping with the same sex... hey I had a boyfriend for a year and I'm straight) while staying quite homosexual thank you very much, but in this case she was obviously not a lesbian. And questionably bi-. And now back to people doing stupid things that really should have lead to being dead.
(That would be the girlfriend of my at the time best friend. Who is a lesbian. (the friend, not, obviously, the girlfriend.))
There needs to be a better way to phrase that.
Rode 60 miles home on my motorcycle while high. On a freeway. On a crowded freeway. Dumbest thing ever. Totally, mind-bendingly dumb. And dumb without even having the slightest bit of cool factor. Oh my god stupid why the fuck am I still in one piece dumb. Driving is dumb enough, but shit, you gotta keep motorcycles upright, that takes at least a little balance.
Well either that or sleeping with my lesbian best friend's girlfriend and getting caught. Twice. But that's a different kind of stupid. And to think after a few years she forgave me.
I was at KFC (yes I was high, of course I was high, is there any other reason on God's green earth to be in a KFC and not be high?) with some friends and as we sat down these two guys walked by and one was saying to the other, "I was so horny when came here, I was so horny." over and over. Everyone our table just looked at each other with that "Umm, I'm high but did I just hear what I thought I heard?" look and voila, Kentucky Horny Chicken was born. I'm still trying to figure out what dehornified the man, as I can't even IMAGINE getting any release in that nasty ass bathroom.
Mao po tofu. When it is good mmm mmm mmm. But tofu in nasty brown goo with a few peas and something that may have once been a pig is far too often what shows up on the plate. When I lived in New York the quality of the mao po tofu was my way to deciding which of the 15 chinese places a block from my house was worth going to. Of course it helped that that was what I ordered half the time.
How do I select the other levels? Game select doesn't seem to do anything.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
My god is that really all there is to this game? When I was like 9-10 I spent WAY too much time trying to win! WAY WAY too much time. I'm still in awe of how simple it was. Wow. It's like seeing a childhood hero and realizing he is just another man. Although on the plus side I finally beat it! Whoo!
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In ""
Except for I just realized how old you are which means some of those steps might have to be skipped. You can also go with playing really depressing or angry music really fucking loudly and driving around aimlessly. But make sure you have someone with you when you do that. Trust me it is better that way.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
Call your best friends. Tell them that you don't care what they are doing with their Friday night, you just got broken up with so they better get their butts over to your place. Make them go drinking with you. Get sloppy drunk. Say a lot of things you'd never normally get away with saying. Throw up. Get taken home and don't remember getting in bed. Wake up around 2pm feeling like shit with a bunch of answering machine messages from the above mentioned friends hoping you made it through the night without any alcohol related incidents. From there you are on your own, but the above seems to be my modus operandi.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "MoFi T Shirt Orders"
I'd be up for 1 large if the price isn't too obscene
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "Behold the healing power of anime!"
Can I have those two minutes back? Please?
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "The internet pushes everything, even sexual limits."
I apologize if I come across as an ass in this post. The problem with discussing this kind of stuff, especially not face to face, is it is really hard not to sound like I'm just whining about how noone understands me or how I'm so different from everyone else so *pout*! That's not my intention at all and if you do read that into my comments I'd appreciate it if the conversation continue either here or via email. I'm pretty bad about articulating myself sometimes, and my natural reaction is just to stay quiet instead of being understood. Ok... disclaimers out of the way, so here we go. I think the problem comes from looking at sexual identity* as a one diminutional graph. We label one end straight, the other gay and say "this area on the graph is het, this here in the middle is het, and here we have gay." But sexuality doesn't always work that way. It's some big multi-dimensional mess, although one that often can be simplified into a pretty decent one I know gay men who are willing to admit full well there are women they have/want to sleep with. But somehow that doesn't make them lose gayness. I know lesbian women (some raging bull dyke oh my god there is no way you are going to confuse them for straight even) who have slept with men after coming out. But somehow being a straight man means no other dicks allowed.. Touch, taste, fuck, hell even jerk off around one, and boom. You Are Bisexual (or for some people, You Are Gay). Why is that? And yes, some men are simply gay and in denial. You don't need to tell me that. And there are also gay men out there who have the whole "I'm gay but don't agree with the gay lifestyle" chip on their shoulders. I'm asking you to trust me when I say I'm neither of those. Despite the best attempts of reactionaries to stuff it back in, the sexual cat (here pussy pussy pussy**) is out of the bag, and it sure as hell ain't going back in. I really think that in a few generations this kind of conversation is going to seem oh so quaint and ignorant. These sorts of issues will be understood, with terms that have evolved as understanding grows. Getting there is not going to be a simple process, there will be plenty of missteps along the way, but don't please don't close your mind and refuse to accept that understood or not, these complexities exist. * I want to go on the record as saying I HATE THIS TERM. I know I've been using it a lot but I still hate it. ** Sorry.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
ThRoach: Yes it can have shades of homophobia, but it doesn't have to. Oh and I'm amused you chose heterosexual as the word to hold onto. While I call myself straight, I sure as hell don't say that I'm hetero. So many terms; so confusing.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
Bernockle: at the risk of sounding like a typical whiny bisexual, sex just isn't that simple. I'm sure if I was versed in sexual/gender theory I could give you better words to use, but I'm not, sorry. I do, however, know that just throwing one shade of grey into your black and white world does not really help much. I will say this though. As someone who has spent a good chunk of his life defining my own sexual identity, saying "you are bisexual, accept it" comes across as simpleminded and arrogant.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
As a straight man who has in the past (and may well in the future) had boyfriends some even long term, I find it funny how many people out there refuse to think that straight men can fool around with other men. Lots of straight women have fooled around with other women, why can't straight guys fool around with other men? (Although to be fair, there are plenty of women out there who will kiss or pet another woman just because guys think it is hot. But I'm not talking about stuff like that.)
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "New Year resolutions;"
I'm learning how to ride a unicycle.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In ""
I've been in this situation and the relationship did a spectacular job of ending miserably. However, a couple years down the line we were able to be pretty good friends again. In some ways even closer friends than before, but there is still a bit of tension that makes get things awkward. You aren't going to be friends again any time soon, but end things soon, end them without being an ass and maybe, especially if you keep in touch with you mutual acquaintances, she will want to revive the friendship some years down the line.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "Abraham Lincoln was Gay"
Damn, Finnegan beat me to it.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "West Coast Whiskeys"
Wow, now where can I buy some? (shouldn't too hard considering I live a few miles from 3 of those breweries.) I've been sad that, as I am boycotting the south and all things I know of that are made there for the net 4 years, I had to switch from American whiskey to scotch. Granted I like a good scotch, but still I was sad.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "Curious George: Scooters"
zippy: You live in SF and can't see why having a motor to go up hills is an advantage?
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "Curious George: Whats the stoopedest theeng yoov evar don?"
kmellis: yeah I agree with you about the homosexual sleeping with the opposite sex thing (and the straights sleeping with the same sex... hey I had a boyfriend for a year and I'm straight) while staying quite homosexual thank you very much, but in this case she was obviously not a lesbian. And questionably bi-. And now back to people doing stupid things that really should have lead to being dead.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
(That would be the girlfriend of my at the time best friend. Who is a lesbian. (the friend, not, obviously, the girlfriend.)) There needs to be a better way to phrase that.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
Rode 60 miles home on my motorcycle while high. On a freeway. On a crowded freeway. Dumbest thing ever. Totally, mind-bendingly dumb. And dumb without even having the slightest bit of cool factor. Oh my god stupid why the fuck am I still in one piece dumb. Driving is dumb enough, but shit, you gotta keep motorcycles upright, that takes at least a little balance. Well either that or sleeping with my lesbian best friend's girlfriend and getting caught. Twice. But that's a different kind of stupid. And to think after a few years she forgave me.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "Busted!"
I was at KFC (yes I was high, of course I was high, is there any other reason on God's green earth to be in a KFC and not be high?) with some friends and as we sat down these two guys walked by and one was saying to the other, "I was so horny when came here, I was so horny." over and over. Everyone our table just looked at each other with that "Umm, I'm high but did I just hear what I thought I heard?" look and voila, Kentucky Horny Chicken was born. I'm still trying to figure out what dehornified the man, as I can't even IMAGINE getting any release in that nasty ass bathroom.
posted by aspo 19 years ago
In "Curious George: Food you seek out"
Mao po tofu. When it is good mmm mmm mmm. But tofu in nasty brown goo with a few peas and something that may have once been a pig is far too often what shows up on the plate. When I lived in New York the quality of the mao po tofu was my way to deciding which of the 15 chinese places a block from my house was worth going to. Of course it helped that that was what I ordered half the time.
posted by aspo 20 years ago
(limited to the most recent 20 comments)