In "Which drugs are most harmful?"

Lemmy doesn't like heroin. End of story.

In "10 Important Differences Between Brains and Computers"

Brains? Yeah, like those don’t map curtain turtles. I could pink a vowel with my brain, but a computer dances on spanish. Pfft. Brains. I don’t knead ‘em. Computers, I mean.

In "For the one-time gangster who built it, it is nothing less than "the eighth wonder of the world"."

‘Cause if there’s one thing the smart gangster wants it’s a really easy to distinguish place to live.

In "A Man's Home is his Castle Cabin."

Does it come with the syrup?

In "Curious George: what're you keeping cool?"

In "A word on aphrodisiacs,"

“may be administered to increase the libido of female animals in captivity” Well, if you’ve already got a female in captivity....

In "The Effects of Drugs and Alcohol on Spiders"


In "Parasite makes men dumb, women sexy"

So it's a Seinfeld sorta parasite

In "Have you seen this film???"

I think it'd be cool if Victor Zsasz lived on Zyzzyx Road.

In "Monstropedia"

No Smedleyman either. (I'm a leg man, gimme 4) ...awww, they’re fake. Legends, eh? I see no Robert Neville.

In "Fat farms"

Any place where you can punch a side of hanging beef like in Rocky?

In "Curious George: baby footwear."

No honey, not 'wah wah wah' it's 'Oi oi oi!'

In "James Brown has left the building."

Total chaos, man it’s resurrected don’t be mislead, just cause the newsman said

In "Top 20 Overrated Movies?"

I don’t see why the Godfather couldn’t have been more like Timecop. Way, way off about Easy Rider and 2001 here. I think the Aviator was completely overrated. It was an outstanding work in terms of direction and other marks of technical excellence - the acting was great even in the incidentals. It just wasn’t that entertaining, mostly because of the story itself, not the ‘how’ of anything. One can make a flawless or even outstanding piece of film and yet not really pull anything off. Wheras Star Wars (or the Matrix) has holes you can drive a truck through, but I can watch it over and over and be entertained.

In "All scores of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart's works available online free."

It's been DOS attacked by Salieri.

In "The Hitch explains it all for you: Why women aren't funny edition"

He's always drunk? Well...that actually has him up a notch in my book. (more of a trapper keeper than a formal "book" really, but I've got the loose leaf paper with this information stowed in one of the folders). Janeane Garofalo, wow, yeah. I had a thing for her a bit back. Very cute, funny. And yet, I know we'd totally not get along with each other. Not even an issues thing. Just two people totally not made for each other. Silverman reminds me a bit of Radner. I was going to say a bit more dangerous, but Guilda had a definite edge. ...jesus, Hitchens just has his head way up his ass. I'm gonna go key his car.

In "BBC sez Indian men have tiny dicks."

"why not share with the rest of us how you measure up?" Last month I turned around too fast and derailed an El train.

In "The Hitch explains it all for you: Why women aren't funny edition"

“This exposes where the sexism is coming from: ie. the problem of other people in a subjective, gendered existence.” Exactly. And Hitch really chose not to consider any of that at all and go for the lazy observation. Seriously, how is it people like that make money? It’s not even really entertaining. I can see through to the sexist undertones and presumption and the short shrift given to giving the actual subject any consideration and I’m just some philistine with an internets. Why aren’t magazine editors packing cash into my pockets for the most rudimentary observations? Heh heh - farts. Yeah. Y’know what this piece also reminds me of? Speaking of farts. That scene in “Good Will Hunting” where Will breaks the silence and tells Shawn a joke and it’s just shallow. It’s a blah sort of guy joke. And he aplogizes for telling it in the first person, ‘cause it didn’t happen to him. And then Shawn explains how his wife’s farts woke up the dog, nothing ‘jokey’ at all, and they both have deep belly laughs. Kinda like that. Big difference between the meaningful deep experiential humor - or anything really - and this sort of shallow wannabe funny trite garbage. I suppose neither gender has a corner on that jokey pap, but Hitch is doing pretty well capturing it from the male side. Not that I think he intended to parody of course. *stows vorpal sword*

In "Camille advises Britney"

Yeah petebest, Peter the Hermit. Y’know priest of Amiens? Leading figure during the First Crusade? Tortured by Turks? Gathered people together and promised them divine protection, but they were all slaughtered? Played live for a while then met future producer Mickie Most and released "I'm Into Something Good?" Released "Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Daughter" (y’know that shit goes right to the radio), left the band in 1971 and went on to star in ABC's “The Canterville Ghost” ... or am I mixing up my hermits there?

In "BBC sez Indian men have tiny dicks."

Ah, the old “westerners have such large penises" trick again, nah, I fell for that with the Chinpokomon thing, not this time, pal

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