In "The war on drugs"

But Gyan, all drugs are the same! Are you _trying_ to help Osama Hussien and his ilk?

In "Fresh monkey meat"

REPOST. Seriously, I like MonkeyFilter because is has 99% less bitching and whining than that "Meta" place. And 50% more COCKPUNCH.

In "Is it rude to diet?"

I second the cock-puch suggestion. People need to STFU about their goddamn diets already.

In "Call Immediately"

Man, I just don't understand baseball!

In "Papal blessing for break-dancers"

boo_radley, that would be Adolfo "Shabba-doo" Quinones. Sheesh.

In "It appears that dodgeball is the latest hip thing."

Dodgeball can never be safe and fun. It's either/or, people.

In "Confused? Worried? Why?"

Man, Islam is hard! *munches pork rind*

In "Why Does Somebody Hate Todd R. Baker of Akron, Ohio?"

NOT A SEAL!

In "Yoko Ono ego over-inflates even further."

Hey, Yoko MADE the Beatles!

In ""

So depressing. I need a drink. Of cold, refreshing Budweiser! From the fine folks at Anheuser Busch!

In "PETA has plans to terrorize children this Christmas"

Bunny rabbits love it when children cry.

In "An interview with Tommy Chong,"

Dear Santa, I would like a new glass bong for X-mas. Also, could you arrange for Tommy Chong's release from prison? And for John Ashcroft to die slowly from crotchrot? Thanks, MML

In "Least Essential Albums Of 2003"

I want to hear Diamond Dave. Does that make me a bad person?

In "Next year is the Year of the Monkey."

I smell as fresh as a monkey!

In "Drunk Worms."

"Humans are a lot more complicated than the worm," said neurobiology professor Steven Treistman of the University of Massachusetts School for The Incredibly Fucking Obvious.

In ""

My workplace has suspended all beatings until after the new year, and we'll get extra gruel on Christmas morning!

In "This Man Shaped Your World."

I want either a Wienermobile or a flying car, and I want one NOW!

(limited to the most recent 20 comments)