October 07, 2005

• The Crusades, despite a brief 732 year interruption, carried on until both sides achieved their goals and presumably went to Heaven. Bystanders were royally fucked, and presumably didn't.
• That's exactly what I've been thinking - the last half of the 20th century was just an intermission, a brief, relatively 'peaceful' period during the ongoing plans of empires. Some players dropped out or got damaged, but the race is still on. Positions still up for grabs, kids.
• As for the specific 90's and early 00's, the caption And this is when people got used to being scared could work.
• Early Post-Atomic Expansion.
• A generation ago, in my part of the world, among the viable-seeming answers to this question would have been The dawning of the Space Age and The dawning of the Age of Aquarius. There was more hope back then, I'm guessing.
• Scholars are already calling it the third Great Awakening, which are periods of greatly increased religious fervor in America. Other than that, I don't know.
• And then the shit really hit the fan...
• Positions still up for grabs, kids. I've applied for "Crafty Urban Survivalist Armed To The Teeth, Sporting a Devil-May-Care Attitude and a Capacious Mean Streak"; however, I understand most of the Eastern Seaboard is ahead of me, so who knows.
• "And then the frog said, "fuck me, this water's hot! and verily, the world did end".
• Bagsy on moneyjane's side!
• I'm now picturing Pirate MoneyJane. Yarrrr!
• History will not have to describe our era. There will be no-one to write it or read it. Our relentless exploitation of the earth's resources will reach a peak and humanity will exit the stage, doubtless with both bangs and whimpers. /cheery fucker
• either, the era just prior to the time when humanity got its collective head out of its collective arse and started addressing the problems that truly matter or a mixture of what y'all have said already. this fence, it's not really that comfortable...
• The fourth 100-million years' period of our history was indeed a golden age for the six families of the Blattodea Order. The world-Empire flourished, and all land-areas were heavily laden with our egg-sacs. Early on into this period there were reports of some of the giants in our cities using strange and intense sun-bombs - by which they radically reduced their own populations in two concentrations in Japan. It is not known why the creatures chose this form of mass suicide, and the (largely unaffected) blattodeans in these regions could only conclude that they had come to resent being our pets. In any case, the fourth period saw a continuing flourishing of all kinds of blattodean culture - indeed, it is generally considered that the six-legged ballet reached its artistic zenith in this period.
• Now George kept the flock of George his father, the priest of Republicanism: and he led the flock to the backside of the desert, and came to the mountain of Saddam, even to Baghdad. And the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a Bush: and he looked, and, behold, the Bush burned with fire, and the Bush was consumed. Exodus V 2.3.1-2
• Episode, 3rd millenium: Revenge of the Shit
• "You may not believe me, son, but all this was buildings, great stone and metal buildings. You see over there by the herd? That was where they used to live, the Old Folks. Heh, if only they'd known..."
• 21st C? OMFG it was teh funnay! they were all like IRAKK U R PWNED!!1!! and then teh clim8 PWNED everyone OMFG LOL SO HARD I SHIT MY PANTS!11 "World History", Encyclopedia Britannica, 22nd Century Edition
• "The Unenlightenment"
• "After a journey of 80 years, the AZTEC ship U.S.S. MONTEZUMA has reached the star system ALPHA CENTAURI..."
• (Come to think of it, it would have been 'A.S.S. Montezuma'. It's been too long...)
• And then God said, "WTF was I thinking?" and created the cosmic delete key. and...these are GREAT answers! a creative, thoughtful, and funny group of primates here. Thanks for the morning smile, probably saved two or three of my employees from my own mini-cosmic delete key!
• "This used to be real estate, now it's only fields and trees..."
• I don't know what we'll call it, but I'm pretty sure Coca-Cola will sponsor it. And there will be t-shirts.
• Technology boom. I'm guessing. Wildly. Taking the last 50-100 years, rapidly expanding technology is the standout feature. Though then, I don't know that much about the speed at which previous technology was developed and adopted by the populace. So more like Before that time, most people didn't have networked computers! Or computers at all! And they had to walk into banks and talk to a clerk in person to get money, at very specific and limited hours! and the kids will say "Ooh, how weird" as though the ancients were reading hand-printed manuscripts by candlelight.
• The Dumbening
• Man, you're a pessimistic bunch. The dawning of the internet, the expansion of globalized trade...those are the only noteworthy things in this era. We actually live in quite boring times, historically speaking.
• Wars? There's always been wars. Even bigger ones than we have right now, though many on the internets seem to think otherwise. Stupid leaders, out for a quick buck or scoring points with their myth-god? Dime a dozen in world history. Stupid people, easily swayed into religious, or, in the last century and a half or so, national bloodlust? Bah. 'Twas always such since the dawn of man. In five hundred or a thousand years, it will be just like we remember things from five hundred or a thousand years ago. The man on the street will remember names like Neil Armstrong better than George Bush, places like Hiroshima better than Fallujah, and things like the ubiquitous computer, electric child of the second great industrial revolution - the electronic revolution. The scholars? Well, they'll continue to what they do now, and fit the late 20th century religious renaissance in with the profound human need to understand SOMETHING when technology and research outpaces even most intelligent people's capacity to keep abreast.
• What's that quote? History is filtered through the eyes of the winners. Hope they don't rely on old newspapers for their information.
• Funny you say that, BlueHorse. I got the idea for this Curious George while looking at an entire week's worth of newspaper stories -- "journalism is the first draft of history," and all that.
• I long for a New Renaissance, whatever that would mean.
• And then God said, "WTF was I thinking?" and created the cosmic delete key. I'll go with that one.
• "After the fall of communism, a major event in the history of the world, things continued relatively smoothly. There were some terrorist attacks, a minor misguided war, etc, but these things were very insignifigant in the grand scheme of things. Although many people chose to tell themselves they were living through the worst era in history, in reality people in the first world continued to live the easiest and longest lives of any human beings at any time in history to that point."
• Oh and "grunge music and the works of Quentin Tarantino were briefly and inexplicably popular."
• The Quidnunc Kid's answer made me LOL SO HARD I spit noodles out onto my keyboard. I really need to stop reading Mofi during my lunch break.
• What the Rocket said, and drjimmy elaborated on. People will look back and say, "Man, they were a tetchy bunch, weren't they?" Then they'll shake their heads with amusement, stifle a giggle, and return to text messaging each other on their phones while they sip really REALLY good margaritas.
• aka: "The Golden Age of the Scrolly Just-Above-The-Ass Tattoo."
• 1990-2000 - The Roaring Nineties 2001-2005 - The Skirmish with Islam 2006-2015 - The Second Great Crash & Depression 2010-2012 - The Rise of Chinese Fascism 2020 - The Second Nuclear War. Other than that, it's pretty smooth sailing.
• The Last Era of Mankind or The First Era of the Cockroach Empire. Personally, I shall call it The Bobster.
• I prefer Toby. Or Linus. Yeah, my wife won't let me name our firstborn Linus, so that goes to the era.
• I'm more interested in how future history will describe the quidnunc kid. he is the lolercoaster.
• croakfilter
• With our attention span the way it is, "our era" is a few minutes between "OMG Bushie is such a fuckwad" and "what skin treatment is there to make me keep my youth?". Ya dig? There are a few tight and fast historic eras, e.g. extraterrestial impacts, but mostly history deals with a broader brush. So how will history describe our era?....heavier than air flight, the links of the internet, and the "I me me mine" sense of time.
• Let's cut to the shizzle; we all have a vague suspicion that the world didn't really exist before we were born. It's as real as anything you read in a book or watch a documentary about; in other words...not so much. There really isn't anything other than the "I me me mine" sense of time. How can there be? We've not experienced anything else.
• Perfectly acceptable, it is, nothing existed before me or will after me.....I am the walrus...goo goo ka joob! So talk of history or of what will come after my existence here is ended is moot, eh? In that case case, why worry, be happy, the world will end shortly....another 50 or 60 years, max.
• Do these pants make me look fat?
• Just your ass, honey. Just your ass.
• So I have 50 or 60 years to tighten my buns. Cool! You guys are too depressing anyway, what with this legagy and sustainability bullpoop.
• Exactly! You wanna die with tight buns so that the generation after you says.."doesn't she/he look good??" Of course, once decomposition sets in, ya won't look so great but who cares?....we live and die and the here and now.
• that should be..."in the here and now"
• 1917-1990 Reefer Madness & War 1991-1995 Renaissance of the Information Era 2001-2043 Reefer Madness & War
• Until I spotted the '90s there roly I thought that was your planned schedule for a cracking Saturday night.
• WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? DON'T MAKE ME RETRACT THIS RETRACTION STOP
• Cool it, cynnbad. That fat ass of yours is getting EXPLOSIVE. But seriously, hasn't every generation thought they were the fulcrum of the universe...the place where it made sense to carry signs saying "repent, Bill Gates is a fuckwad". I think those writing from 2050 will consider this time to be of normal stupidity, kind of like 1865 BC when those religious fundies took over the nation.
• Let's cut to the shizzle; we all have a vague suspicion that the world didn't really exist before we were born. It's as real as anything you read in a book or watch a documentary about; in other words...not so much. And you will all cease to exist after I'm dead.
• The Glorious Era of Cheese
• here really isn't anything other than the "I me me mine" sense of time. How can there be? We've not experienced anything else. Solipsism is never having to say you're sorry.
• When the enviroment finally slapped the human race back., When we finally destroyed the earth.
• OK, I've settled down. Isn't this the age of i's? Ignorance, insolence, isolation, insipidness, idiocy, irregardless, irradiation, irregularity? Oh, I forgot. Iteration. Never mind.
• You forgot 'impotence'. oh crap...
• The Reign of Lord Sludge (aka, Reefer Madness and War...)
• > When the enviroment finally slapped the human race back. When we finally destroyed the earth. ha! that'll show the environment for messing with us.
• Rocket88 wrote: And you will all cease to exist after I'm dead. Let me share the truth about the universe with you --it boils down to the secret word: REINCARNATION. Reincarnation is bullshit but that's because it's meant to hide the truths within. What you do is *take away the first two letters*. You get "incarnation". You see after you die, you come back again but not as *you* but some other totally unrelated you. I can't be sure about this Rocket88, but you would incarnate as a beekeeper. Now stick with me, it gets even better: *Take away the next two letters* and you get "carnation". My secret word predicted the automobile. I picture you driving around the country drinking condensed milk products. See? Okay next take away three more letters and you get "nation". No surprise there (see driving above). But remove three more letters and lo! "Ion", the basic building blocks of the universe! You are some ions. Now take away two more letters and "n" is all that's left. Which i admit is pretty baffling.
• When you put it like that, it makes a lot of sense.
• I alwasy knew those 'Add N to (x)' guys had the solution to life, the universe and everything.