September 19, 2005

• Looks like I'm in for a trip to the pirate store tomorrow for a good mopping.
• avast! time for the chumbucket!
• I think of eerybody here as my chums... oops.
• Monkeyfiltarrrr! I gave my own website a festive pirate theme.
• Cali, I volunteer at 826, and if you haven't been there it's a great place.
• Blow me down!!
• Heave to!
• Shiver me timbers!!!
• They recently did the morning announcements in Piratese at the school where I teach. Didn't work too well. ("Yarr! There be a meeting of the newspaper staff at three bells today.") TPCQ: "Captain McCallister. Isn't it true that you're not a real captain?"
• Arrrgh, I be wondering... Kin ya tell an old salt why Peg Boy didn't appear on the list of "The Worst Jobs in History"?
• Yarr! I be celebratin' this fine day by battin' down me hatches and loadin' me down some pirate-related digital booty! That's right, ye scurvy monkeys, I be meta-piratin'!
• That be double-piratin', not meta-piratin', land lubber! To the plank with ye! Yarr.
• QQQQQ, mateys, QQQQQ
• Arrr, me needs be askin' me lily-livered Frenchie pollywogs if they done know pirate speak in French, arrr. Not a one o'those scurvy curs is gonna understand me t'day.
• Arg, everyone's always after me lucky charms.
• Avast! I nearly forgot! Many thanks be to ye, Mate Skrik!!!
• Arrrrh, I don't know what I'm doing. Yar.
• I say, ye scoundrels and blackguards! Each cutlass and cuirass in the deep, else we'll grapeshot your sails! Prepare to submit to the lawful authority vested in me by his rather financialy strapped majesty, King George II! /privateer!
• Argh! We'd be yieldin' no quarter to a lapdog of the House of Hanoverrrrgh! This be a call to have Fes keel-hauled! Yargh-hargh-hargh!
• I am innocent of the blood of this just person: see ye to it!
• shit wrong day
• *SQUAWK!* I'm on holiday today, ye waisters! *SQUAWK!* I be sittin' in my jammies drinkin' grog!* *SQUAWK! whistle!* *coffee
• Curse the doxy!
• Can I talk like a law abiding sailor?
• Shiver me timbers, whatever happened talk like a UNIX Pirate Day? Arrrrrr,mateys, I've got to go now-I hear that god forsaking ticking again which can only mean that infernal crocodile is upon me again, AAEEEEEIIIIII.....
• Yarr! I be trying to get me office mateys to join in...it be harrrd to talk like a pirate when I haven't had me coffee...
• Yarr. The grog was poured a little too easily last night, and now there's a poundin' in me poop deck. Yarr. Ouch. Yarr.
• Middle Clas Stool - Always beware a pounding in the poop decks, lessen' of course, ye dinner's been bought. Aaaarggh!
• The altimiter's stuck! We're in a steep climb! Quick, release the surplus fuel, we've *got* to pull back on the stick and get this puppy right! pretty good for talk like a pilot day eh? What?
• Stand back lads, the cork is 'bout ta burst!
• Pete, I'm afraid I don't understand that banter at all. Arr.
• Pete's channeling Pirate Walter Mitty methinks...
• What I have written, I have written.
• Ecce homo!
• Seaman Staines! Grapple the midden and bind the batten lest I beat ye off with the belayin' pin! Arrrrrrr!
• That's it, goetter - to the plank wit yerself. It's PIRATE DAY, not PILATE DAY.
• Shamelessly stolen from everything2.com. But that's what pirates do, is steal... More pirate vocabulary: * Arrrrr: Much like the Hawaiian "aloha," it can mean hello, good-bye, etc. * Ahoy: Hey! * Avast: Stop! * Aye: Yes. * Fathom: depth measurement of six feet * Go on the account: to embark on a piratical cruise * Grog: A pirate's favorite drink. * Jack: a flag or a sailor * Landlubber: "Land-lover," someone not used to life onboard a ship. * Lass: A woman. * League: three miles * List: lean to one side * Loaded to the Gunwhales: drunk * Matey: A shipmate or a friend. * Me: My. * Privateer: a pirate officially sanctioned by a national power * Scallywag: A bad person. A scoundrel. * Son of a Biscuit Eater: a derogatory term indicating a bastard son of a sailor * Sprogs: raw, untrained recruits * Squiffy: a buffoon * Squadron: a group of ten or less warships * Sweet trade: the career of piracy * Thar: The opposite of "here." * Yo-ho-ho: Pirate laughter Double up on all your adjectives and you'll be bountifully bombastic with your phrasing. Pirates never speak of "a big ship", they call it a "great, grand ship!" They never say never, they say "No nay ne'er!" Drop all your "g"'s when you speak and you'll get words like "rowin'", "sailin'" and "fightin'". Dropping all of your "v"'s will get you words like "ne'er", "e'er" and "o'er". Instead of saying "I am", sailors say, "I be". Instead of saying "You are", sailors say, "You be". Instead of saying, "They are", sailors say, "They be". Arrrrr....
• It's the prophet flashboy's fault. I, um, know not the man. *denies three times*
• um...argh?
• Yaaar! Thinks ye that if I talks to me students this way all day they'll believe my sanity has walked the plank? Ha HAR! of course, I am teaching on the internets, so I think it's highly appropriate!
• Pirate-talk is a lot like Ebonics.... /ducks
• Scurvy Squidranch! Ye've taken all the fun out of 't with yer book larnin' bilge! Why, I'll spike ye with a .. spikey thing.. for turnin' pirate day inta such a geek spasm!!!
• um... ehem... Yar?
• I thought I was the bally table king, me hearties I just handed my pinball crown to him.. ahoy!
• Arrrrrggargleargle wait, let me try ag'in Arrrrgehehgheghe Crap, that's not it Arrrrrggggagagagagag hock hack PITU! *spits hairball damn ye', ne'r ye mind
• Leftenant, train all our cannon on this lawless rabble.
• *boatswain's whistle*
• HANOVERIAN SCUM!!! I's got a cannon of me own trained on ye RIGHT HERE! *grabs 'sabre', rattles*
• Everythin' I be knowin' about pirate-lingo I be larnin' from Pirate Jack Sparrow. Yarrr, he be welcome to shiver me timbers. *watches Pirates of the Caribbean a dozen times, swoons*
• Yes. Well. Gentlemen? Do add a pair of three-pounders to that tiny culverin the loud, gamy fellow is holding onto so dearly and complete the set for him, yes? A cannon just isn't complete without a ball or two, and these sodden rapscallions so rarely have any at all.
• 
• Yargh, uh, yer goin' to have to speak English there, college bai... Yargh!
• YO HO HO! Stacy Keach be starrin' in a made-fer-tv movie 'bout Blackbeard! YARGH! Set yer VCRrrrrrrrs! 'Tis a fine, fine thing to see Stacy's spirits all afire, 'stead of playin' nice bai like... Seriously, a nice prison warden? Can't we see him kick some guard dogs or somethin'? What's up with that? I mean, YARGH!
• Send them to the depths, sir. Cap'n Fes, your glass. *readies the main brace* Full to port, sir, firing lines ready. *Fes peers through the glass as the scurvy dogs across the main prepare to meet their Maker.* And sir, might I request you sign this affadavit declaring the pirates were indeed the famous marauders listed in our charter mission statement? Thank you. Give the word, sir, and we'll send these lads to Hell and its spawn.
• Arrrrrrr! Avast ye scurvy dogs! Ready the long twelves, chain shot to dash their riggin' asunder! To the bottom with 'em! Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
• YARRR! We've hit 'er in the futtock shrouds!
• 
• Oh i get it. You guys are talking like pirates!
• Yay! Eastendarrghs is acomin' in! Partagggghy hartagghty charvagggghy!
• *lowers spyglass, nods, signs* You may proceed at your earliest convenience, Mister F8x, and continue at will.