September 13, 2005

• "Hail Satan."
• "Go to Hell"
• "Thank you."
• Speaking of Ophelia, "Get thee to a nunnery, lion-fodder," might be, at least, on their level.
• I suppose it depends on your personal reaction to this (I'm assuming you're not a theist -- fair?), and what you want to convey to the person who said it. If it bothers/offends you, I'm sure there's a polite way to convey that. If you don't really care or accept it as good wishes, then a simple "Thanks" would probably do it. They're probably not looking for a "Praise Jesus Hallelujah" or "Allahu Akbar" in response. Even as a theist living in the South, it's always struck me as a sort of weird, forced Christian thing (like referring to fellow churchgoers as "Brother" this and "Sister" that), so I usually respond with "Thanks" or "Have a good one" as if they had simply wished me a good day.
• what MCT said. geez it's like i'm on the MCT parade today
• Mr. B, you can talk them about Solem We.
• "... and best of luck to you, too"? On a related note, is there a way to address/refer to a RC priest other than "Father"? He's *not* my father (AFAIK), and I don't particularly want to show him any more respect than I would to, say, a school guidance counsellor.
• Hesitate, then "Thanks."
• "Keep it real."
• I hear it in NYC too, primarily from African American women. I assume that they belong to an evangelical brand of Christianity. Both here and in the South (where I am from), I usually respond back with a hearty "Blessed Be" which is a common Pagan greeting. It usually gives them pause, beause they know something is off, but aren't quite sure what.
• "Go fuck yourself."
• "Keep it real, motherfucker."
• "Who gives a shit?"
• "Have you heard the Good News about Anal Leakage?"
• There is a very polite mechanism for refusing something offered to you that you don't want, and I use it in these situations. Just say "No thank you."
• "And may yours be lacking in Oatemal and Skool Sossage."
• =oatmeal /63 and can't spell oatmeal. Lead him to the knackers!
• "God is made up and when you die worms eat you."
• "Tryin' to quit."
• "May you be Touched by his Noodly Appendage"
• "My penis salutes you!"
• "You too." I'd play it easy. If that's what they want to believe, what's it to you? You can play a bit of self-deception on your part -- they didn't say 'blessed by Our Lord and Saviour' or something, so it's perfectly within your rights to assume that they intended your day to be blessed by the Lotto 6/49 Corporation.
• "Would you care to supersize that?"
• "Who gives a bloody shit?"
• I like kimdog's response. As for me, I'd just say thanks. It's not like their dual-purpose greeting (proselytizing to the unbeliever and "edifying" the believer) really is any more intent-driven than any other polite niceties. People asking "how are you?" usually AREN'T interested in the real answer, they're just being polite, and so it is with "Have a blessed day." Innocuous chatter begs to be responded in kind.
• I like kimdog's response. As for me, I'd just say thanks. It's not like their dual-purpose greeting (proselytizing to the unbeliever and "edifying" the believer) really is any more intent-driven than any other polite niceties. People asking "how are you?" usually AREN'T interested in the real answer, they're just being polite, and so it is with "Have a blessed day." Innocuous chatter begs to be responded in kind.
• *responded to
• middleclasstool: They're probably not looking for... "Allahu Akbar" in response. I like the Muslim response concept, I'm pretty sure that would shake a lot of "blessed day" types up a great deal. But I'm guessing that saying "Allah is great!" (i.e., same meaning, but in English) would be somewhat more widely understood in the US and more likely to get the point across. Or how about "All hail Discordia!"
• "Have a blessed day." "Fnord."
• fish, you can refer to RC priests as 'Reverend', although that may be a North American thing.
• CR- I thought that was only for Protestant clergy? Anyway, it smacks of reverence which I do not feel. Can I say, e.g., "Priest O'Malley"?
• OK, that HAS to be a regional thing because I've NEVEr heard that (or perhaps never hearing that is a regional thing). When I firest saw it, I thought, "What is this? Some kind of New Age Hippy greeting?" I would just ask them, "What are you? Some kind of hippy wican freak or something?" (Not to discourage people from living or behaving however they want or to stereotype hippies or wicans) I would assume that if these are some kind of conservative christian people the thought of being accused of being a hippy or a witch would be enough to make them stop saying that.
• "Thank you, but I have other plans."
• I used to work for this audio company that did a lot of PAs for Christian gatherings, some big some small, I'd end up mixing for all these things, and had all these people saying 'bless you' or some variant, such as 'jesus loves you' etc, and telling me about god in rapturous tones. Really, I can't stand people shoving their religion down my throat, but I could never come up with a witty reply; I eventually just ended up letting out a contemptous choked laugh, because by that time I couldn't care less if my job was on the line. And then I'd have to put up with my boss sitting down and going on and on about how he believes what the bible 'says' pronouncing 'says' to rhyme with 'saves', and showing me these ridiculous fucked up videos proving that Noah's ark is on Mt Arrarat or how the Jesuits are evil. Fuckhead. And he ripped me off for several grand, which is why I don't dig evangelicals or born agains at all because they are invariably full of shit hypocrites who drive me up the wall. Met hundreds of 'em and not one among 'em saner than a bucket of rats. I really *would* have liked the courage to just say "go fuck yourself" to these people with a smile, but I wasn't as rude and cunty back then. /sits down
• Oh, except for the time I told the head pastor of the WA 7th Day Adventist community that I was an Occultist. He really didn't know what to say and avoided me after that, which I enjoyed immensely.
• chimaera: did you say something?
• Oh, nothing, lagged. fnordNevermind.
• further to the FSM, perhaps "arrrr, matey!" would do?
• Last week some idiot at the bar was jumping all over my shit because I told him I was an Atheist.It's not like I go around bringing up religion, but he made the mistake of praising Bush for his religious values, blah,blah,blah. When I get the blessed treatment, I just ignore it, realising that alot of these people are unknowingly partially responsible for the deaths of innocent children worldwide by their political affiliations and social structuring. Organised religions are cults of persuasion.
• Gruß Gott!
• Use revised spelling, mare!!!! /spittle
• "Organised religions are cults of persuasion." Indeed. Typhoid Marys of the mind virus.
• That's what I thought too, fish, but then our bunch of local pedophiles and common bandits parish priests started using 'Rev.' on all their correspondence. I didn't go for calling them 'Reverend', as I didn't feel that they deserved to be revered, but nor did I like calling them 'Father'. I had a father already, thanks. And the 'Our Father' referred to only ONE Father, not one Father with a bunch of sub-contractors. So, long story short, I assume 'Rev' is OK, as it's more in accord with my own attitudes than 'Father', although I'm not happy with it.
• "Same to you"? It depends on the intention, I guess; is it a genuine greet, based on their beliefs, or like a hook, a codephrase to check you out, see your reaction, initiate discussion? On the first case, I'll show basic respect an that's that. Of course, as Chyren said, it's hard to be tolerant or respectful of hypocrite bastards that won't say god's name in vain but won't think twice of embezzling or adultery, as long as no one is the wiser...
• Everyone in Memphis knows about the "blessed day" thing, because it seems to be peculiar to a cult - er, I mean sect - called COGIC, or Church of God in Christ. About 100,000 of them descend on the city during their annual convention, all dressed to the nines. Some restaurants close during that week because COGIC apparently forbids their members from tipping their servers.
• Alright, I know they're freaks but I have rarely had anyone say that to me who didn't seem to mean it. It's kind of sweet and I feel for people whose emotional structure is underpinned by a lot of badly cross-referenced superstition. I just smile stupidly and move on. The thing I have a serious problem with is people whose first question is "And what church do you belong to?" since here in the south it means 'how much money do you make/are you the heretical pagan you appear to be?' Also: "no saner than a bucket of rats"-I'm so stealing that.
• Some restaurants close during that week because COGIC apparently forbids their members from tipping their servers. How financially convenient. Don't say anything in return bernockle. Just flash them the ol' Buddy Jesus.
• My hovercraft is full of eels.
• "I feel for people whose emotional structure is underpinned by a lot of badly cross-referenced superstition" Oh, man, that is an awesome turn of phrase and I hereby appropriate it to use in conversation.
• I don't understand why the heck some of you feel that it would be acceptable to be purposly unpleasant to someone who has simply said a harmless, inoffensive greeting, simply because you don't have the same beliefs as they do. Would you say "go fuck yourself" to a muslim who sad "Allah is great" to you? Just what the world needs. More bloody unpleasantness and nastyness. Grow up. Act like adults. Be polite. You really want to stoop to that level?
• Grow up. Act like adults. Be polite Be like me, insert a stick up your ass
• Depends on whether I know them well or if it's someone with whom I won't be interacting again (a one-time work-related call, etc.) If I know them well or will have to deal with this regularly, I'd try to gauge whether they're making a passive-aggressive point or whether it's just a reflex to them. Passive-aggressive point, then it's time to say something like "If, by some miracle, no pun intended, I do convert, it won't be because of gestures like that. If your Boss wants to step in, then He'll do it. Leave it to Him. So please stop dropping hints. Thank you." If it seems like a reflex, I'd probably ignore it or say "same to you, thanks." Caveat: this has never happened to me. If it's someone whom I don't have to deal with ever again - which I have had happen a few times: I don't feel like getting all aggravated and aggrieved over a one-time thing. I think it glosses over my brain, and I say something like "thank you, goodbye" as if they'd said "have a nice day." I am too lazy to make a fuss over anything short of missing limbs, and they aren't going to care about my opinion anyway.
• Half the problems in the world are due to intolerance and people acting like assholes. If someone is causing no harm by using a greeting like that, let it be. Live and let live.
• Indeed, fimbulvetr.
• And the other half of the problems in the world are caused by people who worship some invisible man, impose their religion on others and don't believe in the Flying Spaghetti Monster. (fucking heathens)
• Hmm, a stick up the ass. Would it vibrate? /ponder
• As a religious person myself, I'm pretty upset about the anti-faith prejudice on this site. It's pretty pathetic, in my opinion - and in certain respects I do take it personally. Basically, I'm a Jehovah's Witness. I go around my neighbourhood knocking on people's doors and when they answer I say, "Hello - is Jehovah here? No? Oh - OK. But look, if you see him, tell him I'm looking for him. Thanks." This Jehovah guy is always getting sued for some fucking thing, which is why he needs so many witnesses to say "it wasn't him", and why he had to make a special arrangement with the Jewry. I personally hope that he gets off, because I really don't want to go back to that other religion where they don't let you fuck goats.
• Wow. I am so worshipping the wrong God.
• "If someone is causing no harm by using a greeting like that, let it be..." But they *are* causing harm. I personally experience real physical pain in proximity to the yawning black-hole of stupidity that goes with such beliefs. It actually causes me measurable, objective injury to be exposed to cretins.
• Intolerance is from both the religious and atheist. And imposing your beliefs on others, whether it is atheist or religious is not acceptable. However, I don't think saying "have a blessed day" can count as "imposing your beliefs". It is a far cry from burning the unbelievers or locking people in a room and brainwashing them. You are free to take or leave a comment like that. Responding with a nasty remark does nothing but make the world a little more unpleasant. The only reason for doing it is tp be an asshole and stroke your ego to feel a little more morally superior than someone else.
• It actually causes me measurable, objective injury to be exposed to cretins Yeah but think how they must feel.
• Welcome to the internet. Your skin must be this thick to ride.
• Chyren, I am just as irritated at hearing "have a nice day" as I am "have a blessed day", but the fact is they are just meaningless pleasentries, appended to the end of a conversation. Judging people to be stupid or cretins because they do not share the same beliefs as you is just plain intolerance. Highly intellegent, thinking people, including scientists -- the REAL ones who accept facts such as evolution etc -- believe in God. And other, highly intellegent people do not. It doesn't mean they should run around demeaning each other over a difference in beliefs that really doesn't matter -- you won't find out either way till you're dead, anyways.
• If "Have a blessed day" gets your back up, what do you say when someone says "Bless you" when you sneeze? Maybe it's second nature to these people in the same way that responding to a sneeze with "Bless you" is to others. I got a card from a neighbour the other day in which she wrote "May God bless you and your family". I took it as a gesture of goodwill, nothing more.
• I usually insert a spurious deity name. My latest favorite would have to be (in a super-cheery voice that anyone who knows me knows I mean business), "Arioch bless you too!" Mostly because I just feel so silly saying 'Hail Satan' to most people.
• fimbulvetr: I don't understand why the heck some of you feel that it would be acceptable to be purposly unpleasant to someone who has simply said a harmless, inoffensive greeting, simply because you don't have the same beliefs as they do... Grow up. Act like adults. Be polite. On the one hand, I think maybe you've got a point. In my own experience, the people I've known who said or who seemed likely to say these things were loudly opinionated, fiercely intolerant, nosy, and often plagued with some debilitating character flaw. One in particular didn't hesitate to advertise her superior piety but refused to answer a simple "Good morning!" with anything other than a glare. When I read this post, I instantly filled in the role of the "have a blessed day" sayer with one of these actual people. So I suppose my instant, negative reaction is to that real person or persons. In the case of the people I've got in mind, "have a blessed day" wouldn't be "harmless, inoffensive," but just the tip of an iceberg of unwanted salvation that little miss "have a blessed day" is just dying to unload on me. Of course, what I'm doing is projecting my experience from a few people onto much larger groups - a common and handy sort of cognitive shorthand, but one which could be cast as discrimination of a sort also. If in future, I am told to "have a blessed day," I'll try to bite my toungue. On the other hand, how would you feel about someone who ended every conversation with a snappy "I shall inform Lord Vader!"? Wouldn't you tend to avoid mentioning Star Wars around them, for fear they'd just never shut up about it?
• "Judging people to be stupid or cretins because they do not share the same beliefs as you is just plain intolerance." Oh for fucks sake, please take this dollar and buy a sense of humour. "Highly intellegent, thinking people, including scientists -- the REAL ones who accept facts such as evolution etc -- believe in God." So what? I believe in a universal mind, a sort of God, as well. I still like to tell people to piss off now and then, I think it's actually warranted some times. I don't like born agains. Because I've met hundreds of them and every single one was a twit. I have no problem with people who believe in god or allah or whatever, but the fundos shit me off good and proper. That's just a little bugbear of mine. And that goes for hindus, moslem, jews or any other faith, don't invade my space with your beads and whistles.
• Oh, I've just realised that bernockle asked this question. "Owl semen", natch.
• I shall inform Lord Vader!
• Chy, you must hate evangelical ravers.
• You've got to be kidding, right? "Have a blessed day" likely means nothing more than "I ask my God to bless you so that you may have a wonderful day," aka "hope you don't get hit by a car." Whatever the specific mechanism by which this occurs (God, Bob or random noise in the universe), the sentiment is the same; responding with anything other than a polite word in kind is asking for a fight for no particular reason. In polite company, we call this "being a jackass." Seriously, just because the fuckwit in charge of your country happens to be a Christian doesn't mean you should feel free to piss all over anyone who practices the religion. And I say this as someone who will likely never step foot inside a church for a religious service.
• "Chy, you must hate evangelical ravers." Oh, I just hate everybody. It saves time.
• hehe, I start out hating everybody, then work my way down to where I just hate some people more than others. That way, I show no unearned cronyism. (I got to quit this thread)
• Hug them.
• Dryhump them.
• You say: "Thank you, have a great day!" A nice gesture is a nice gesture. Would it be better if these dastards just stuck their noses in the air and walked by without saying anything at all? In my books, that'd be much ruder. Damned if you do, damned if you don't... Don't get me wrong, I'm no pulpit licker. I believe life has as much of a point as a nerf ball, and when you die, you dead. But when my Grandma gave me a little decorative plate that said "God bless this messy apartment" did I smash it over her head and scream "Mine be a godless empire, biatch!"? No. I thanked her, and now I put my keys, pennies, and nicklebags in it.
• I really am glad that I've never heard anyone say that because seriously, it really does sound like something that someone wearing crystals would say. I don't htink it has anything to do with religion, i think it has to do with sounding really affected and something people chose to say, rather than "have a nice day" which is a meaningless phrase we say without meaning it (although it sounds like perhaps this blessed day thing is common in some areas, so perhaps they do say it without meaning it). There are lots and lots of people who are Christian who donn't mentione their beleifs every two sentences. Of course I'm Catholic so the people that are likely to say this phrase are probably likely to think I"m going to hell anyway, so it doesn't really matter...
• It's not the good wishes that are offensive, it's the method of delivery, the way of insinuating one's personal beliefs regarding a deity into the greeting, that's irksome. This is doubly presumptuous: (a) the greeters are speaking as if their deity is the greetee's deity, and (b) to assume that the greetee believes in a deity at all is fairly bold. Imagine what hackles would be raised if I were to go about chirping "Have a guiltfree, godless day!"
• As David Bowie once said, Wild is the Wind
• and restless are the eels in yonder hovercraft.
• The eels look quite calm over there, to me, but have you seen the ones one the sunken ferry? Mad and untrustworthy
• 'Shalom' Just because you have your evangelical religion, doesn't mean you get to stuff it down my throat. That's the beauty of a free society. Oh, turn the other cheek, like it says in the bible
• Oh, fuck.. listen, the hate speech in the bible outweighs any of that good stuff. My favorites are the rules about killing a woman who is not a virgin on her wedding night, and killing gays and people of other religions. There are no end of juicy commands to go forth and kill. Curse your parents? Death. Blasphemy? Death. Work on the sabbath? Death. Happen to be the child of a sinner? Death. In fact, kill all the family of a sinner, it's right there in black and white. Fuck that noise.
• Look! Infidel.
• Bug-eyed, mindlessly smiling coworker: "Have a blessed day." Me (putting hand down pants and beginning to pant rhythmically): "Yes. Yes. Say that again, please, yes."
• "ook ook"
• I don't understand why the heck some of you feel that it would be acceptable to be purposly unpleasant to someone... How would you rate this response? (a) High (b) Hello (c) Good evening.
• ...erm that is to say, what we say we're going to say is a whoooooole different story from what we actually say....
• "Time to die!!!"
• Speak for yourself, StoryBored, you ever-frustrated sniffer of crotchless panties!
• I doubt amybody's ever going to read this, but anyway: I'm a die-hard rabid atheist myself, but I have no trouble responding to "God bless you!" -- or "Have a blessed day!", which for some reason I haven't heard yet -- with "Thanks! You too!" or something similar. In those situations, usually in passing with someone you may never see again, I see no reason to be rude or ruin someone's day just because I don't share their beliefs. Is one's consistent application of ideology worth upsetting or insulting somebody who's only trying to wish you well? On the other hand, as someone who was repeatedly gotten out of bed on Saturday morning by Jehovah's Witnesses, I have little mercy for such intrusions: those people do not seek to wish me well in gratitude for telling them how to find Blueberry Hill, they actually invaded my private space to force their religion on my heretofore slumbering self. So I tried politely declining, arguing theology, or whatever, but they just kept coming. So one day I favored them with my best hungover grin and in a polite, reasonable and even affable voice explained that I'm a gay atheist communist with mental illnesses and bad habits that they would not want anywhere near their Kingdom Hall, that they have more chance of plucking my last nerve than saving my soul, and asked them to spread the word among their co-religionists that it would be better for all concerned if they all ignored me forever and passed by my door as if the Devil himself lives here. (Something like that; I'm sure I tried to be more poetic.) I distinctly remember this woman standing up very straight, getting that Offended Dignity look on her face and saying something like I clearly have a demon in me and she would pray for me but they will never come near my hellish hole again, and then they stomped huffily away. And no Jehovah's Witness ever knocked on that door for the remaining 3.5 years I lived there. And by the way, the Muslim counterpart to "Have a blessed day!" would typically be "Salam alaikum!", in other words "Peace, dude!"; the response is "wa alaikum salam" ("Peace to you too!")
• Most commenting in this thread need to learn to use a dictionary. One of the OED definitions of "blessed" is: Enjoying supreme felicity; happy, fortunate. It doesn't have to mean anything religiously.
• Christ, I just realized that all this time I been saying, "Thank your god I didn't get herpes," I've been assuming the homeless boys I picked up from the mission were religious. I'm so, so sorry...
• We have a "Jesus loves you" guy near the local grocery store. You can spot him a mile away, and he says it with this big, sloppy, sincere smile. I can't be mean to him. The most I do is catch him off guard by saying it to him first -- "HEY! Jesus loves you" -- he just grins back. And I'm one ornery anti-religious bastard, too.
• Jesus H. Christ on a stick, some people here need to get a motherfucking sense of humor. The rest of you are pretty funny, sometimes.
• "May your God go with you."
• If "Have a blessed day" gets your back up, what do you say when someone says "Bless you" when you sneeze? Maybe it's second nature to these people in the same way that responding to a sneeze with "Bless you" is to others. In one of my social circles where there are a lot of non-theists, atheists, and organized-religion-haters, the correct response to a sneeze is "platypus" and the correct response to that is "aardvark". Try it; it's catchy. I'm in the don't-be-an-asshole camp, although I've been known to say "Blessed be!" cheerily if I'm feeling particularly aggravated. It's social noise. Treat it like social noise, even if it annoys you.
• layne, lady layne, that was hi-fuckin'-larious. I see no reason to be rude or ruin someone's day just because I don't share their beliefs. Because your beliefs make you a better person than they are, and their beliefs make them unworthy of basic respect and courtesy! Duh! I love the "when they say X they mean YZABCDEFG and a pony" statements. I wish I had ESP like you. It'd save me soooo much trouble in daily life. Seriously, to many people it IS just a reflex like "have a nice day." 'Sides, if you mean to smash the regime and bring down the Man, there are other battles you could pick.
• And by the way, the Muslim counterpart to "Have a blessed day!" would typically be "Salam alaikum!", in other words "Peace, dude!"; the response is "wa alaikum salam" ("Peace to you too!") When my brother was in Iraq he told me one of his fellow soldiers started responding to "Salam alaikum" by saying "Lick my salami". It amused him, and the locals apparently just thought he had a bad accent. Of course one of these days that guy is going to meet an Iraqi with a better grasp of English, which won't be a pretty picture. It's better to err on the side of politeness with a stranger, to avoid unnecessary conflict. For me, I don't get offended so much by the religious overtones of a greeting, but by the person delivering it. If it's someone I don't know, well, no need to be anything but polite. If, however, the person delivering the greeting is someone I know damn well to be a rabid, fundy, fake tool, I'm much less likely to let it slide. Not so much because I feel they're shoving Jesus down my throat, but because I will generally make it known that I'm not comfortable with that - and after that point, their continued effort to bless my day will be less of an innocuous greeting and more of an attempt to force upon me an attitude that I have already stated I disagree with. So my point is be polite if it's a sranger, but (to use an example from my wife's workplace) if it's the woman in the next cubicle who continually blesses you (despite several emails explaining in detail how unwanted such blessings are, not to mention the atheist cartoons hanging in the cubicle) feel free to reply with "Fuck off, you fake bitch".
• It sounds a bit like mild Victorian Cockney swearing to me, as in "I was up and dahn them apples and pears 'arf the blessed day." So perhaps the correct response is: "And the same to you an' a many of 'em, me ol' cocksparrer!".
• On a Jehovah's Witness tangent, my father was once working under his car, and had called over his best friend (who was notoriously opposed to work of any sort) to help him out with it. From his vantage point under the car, he saw a pair of perfectly polished, black dress shoes walking up the driveway. Still under the car, he shouted, "You fucking ASSHOLE. You show up in your dress shoes and nice pants so you don't have to help me with this? REAL FUCKING NICE. I don't give a shit that you'll get grease on your good clothes, get under this car and help out." And the shoes started running away. My dad rolled out from under the car. Jehovah's witness. His friend did show up, and was in more appropriate attire, ten minutes later. The Jehovah's witnesses never did darken our door again.
• Nice story Musing!
• Speak for yourself, StoryBored, you ever-frustrated sniffer of crotchless panties! You are clearly possessed of a demon! Exeunt I command thee! Leave the innocent body of beloved HWingo! E Pluribus Unum! Exempli gratia! *HWingo's head starts rotating* Uh, Caveat emptor! Habeas Corpus!
• On a related note, is there a way to address/refer to a RC priest other than "Father"? ... Can I say, e.g., "Priest O'Malley"? You could always say "Mister O'Malley."
• Or just "the defendent"
• Chyren says: And he ripped me off for several grand, which is why I don't dig evangelicals or born agains at all Had something similar happen to me once, which is why I now heed William Burroughs' "Words of advice to young people": If you're doing business with a religious son-of-a-bitch, Get it in writing. His word isn't worth shit. Not with the good lord telling him how to fuck you on the deal.
• Someone feels they can bless me, I feel I can kill them.
• I will say that having a bad experience with an evangelical chrisitian is like a girl i once met who said she didn't trust black men because she once had a bad experience with one... However, I wonder how people feel about wishing "Merry Christmas" to non-christians? Everytime I've had religious people come to the door, I've talked to them if I had the time and they never came back! I wasn't even weird to them or anything! (at least not on purpose) I guess a single man isn't in their demographic...
• I will say that having a bad experience with an evangelical chrisitian is like a girl i once met who said she didn't trust black men because she once had a bad experience with one... Holy shit? That is such a non sequitur. You're trying to imply racism, not predjudice based on ideological empiricism. And, contrary to popular belief, it's ok to have an opinion of how to live one's own life. You need the Jesus to go up in that ass and do things to you, religiously. The difference between racism and ideological conflict is like the difference between To Kill a Mockingbird and 1984. Although, oddly enough they both have a big brother. Still, I don't think Jem watched Scout everywhere she went. That's creepy in the predominantly Christian south. Oh, wait, they're brother and sister. Sorry it was the same book. You're right.
• "Nice tits"
• What is the proper way to respond to someone who tells you, "Have a blessed day?" It depends on the results you wish for and how important you are, I suppose. If complaining to someone's supervisor is an option, it is open to you. I'm not sure I would take that tack if it was the only problem I had in interacting with someone. After Elizabeth Anderson "ignored a supervisor's warning to stop using the 'blessed' greeting in e-mail with a Microsoft worker who had objected to its religious overtones," [link] her employer instituted a broad no-blessings policy, and she took her grievance to the EEOC. Last I heard she was unsuccessful in court, but it may not be over yet. There are more facts about her case in this this court decision.
• The correct answer is "Thank You". When you progress past adolescence you'll understand. For those in the 'get a sense of humour' camp: Can you accurately gauge which responses above have been jokes and which have been serious?
• islander, you are *so* going to Heck.
• Aitch ee double-hockeysticks?
• "Don't tell me what to do!"
• "We love you Steve!" Oh yeah? Well let's screw.
• Shit in their mouth. It's the only way to be sure.
• When you progress past adolescence you'll understand. When you progress past adolescence you'll understand.
• good comeback
• I know you are, you said you are, so what am I? Oh man, this is bringing back memories of all those pre-teen comebacks, before I learned to swear.
• No, yours is a good comeback. I shall inform Lord Vader!
• The correct answer is "stfu rocket"
• Holy shit? That is such a non sequitur... Here's a related question then. When someone says to you "Holy shit, nice pants!!", is it socially ok to condemn them to Hell?
• I never damn anyone for admiring anything in the vicinity of my shapely buttocks.
• Here's a related question then. When someone says to you "Holy shit, nice pants!!", is it socially ok to condemn them to Hell? Thank you!
• This thread needs at least a couple taglines. MonkeyFilter: May you be Touched by his Noodly Appendage MonkeyFilter: When you progress past adolescence you'll understand. And because my last nerve is worn to the bone, just for MCT, I give you this one. MonkeyFilter: I shall inform Lord Vader! NOW will you STFU wid dat???
• Apparently, some have further to progress than others.
• Repetitious?
• "Had one yesterday. It didn't go well." Or you could always try the relatively harmless yet subtley empowering, "Thanks, I already am."
• No, yours is a good comeback. No, it's a greater honor for me.
• "Have a blessed day" is OK with me, but I cringe whenever they say, "Have a Bless day."
• No, yours is a good comeback. No, it's a greater honor for me. No, I am Don Francisco's sister.
• Repetitious?
• No, yours is a good comeback. No, it's a greater honor for me. No, I am Don Francisco's sister. Wheat... lots of wheat... fields of wheat... a tremendous amount of wheat!
• Repetitious!
• Wheat... lots of wheat... fields of wheat... a tremendous amount of wheat! That is so ... jejune.
• That is so ... jejune. Jejune?! You're calling me 'jejune?' Me? You have the temerity to insinuate that I'm talking to you out of jejunosity? Look, I'm one of the most june guys in all of Russia!
• ...which is to say jejunosity is subjective!