August 23, 2005

• I'd upgrade my teeth.
• Do they have a goblin remover?
• It wouldn't be cool to just have your arm replaced for fun. The cool kids would lose their arm in the Great Robot Wars, and then be forced by the military to have cybernetic replacements so they could return to combat. After the war you would sit in a bar and drink. A local thug picks a fight with you, which no one thinks you will win. That is when your seemingly normal looking arm powers up and you kick his ass. Afterwards, however, you lament about the fact that the government tried to turn you into the thing that you hate the most, a robot. That is how the cool kids do it.
• iPenis. There. I said it.
• My robot teeth would all be straight, and laser guided. There would be little saws in each to cut through chewy stakes, and my overbite would also be romved. They would blow grey smoke when I'm angry, and blow blue smoke the other way when I'm calm. Also, my crooked smile would be repaired.
• Two words regarding my post above: Shocker Mode.
• I'd want just one arm and one leg. That way I'd look all cyborgy. The arm would allow me to reenact scenes from Army of Darkness, and I'd have the leg designed to house a squirt gun so I could play Robocop. Robotic eyes would be cool, too.
• The slightly wonky little finger on my left hand.
• I expect that the biotech advancements in our lifetimes will parallel the computer/industrial advancements in our parents and grandparents lifetimes. I doubt that purely "robotic" replacement parts will ever be a big/common deal, but that biotech enhanced organic parts will be. I think that very many people in my (Gen-X) generation will not be able to accept large changes. It is too much. They/we'll accept medical advancements, but not like the stuff the youth will do. Extreme body modification will be common within my lifetime. Personally, I'd like a significantly enhanced immune system, a better digestive system, and more efficient muscles which are not as subject to random pain and which do not require regular maintenance. In addition, I'd like the ability to regulate my body fat without resort to brute-force cutting or suction, and without requiring hours of mind-numbingly-dull exercise. I might like horns, I'm not sure about that. It would be fun, especially if easily reversible. I would like wings, especially if they were not permanent.
• I would like a pair of robot eyes, please. Being able to see when I wake up in the morning would be lovely. Oh, and if you could put heat lasers in them too, and x-ray vision and night vision and infrared. And I want one to be a mirror, and the other one a snow globe with a tiny Santa in it. Thank you. And one robotic buttock that can play MP3s. Thanks.
• I'll tell you what, MCT's right: I could do with some eyes that had built-in, a picture-in-picture rear view, nightsight and a little scrolling bar at the bottom with time, weather and GPS.
• also, Kokoian heat lasers.
• I'd settle for long-live, high-performance, maintenance-free joints. All of them. /old, not joking
• Heavy-duty digestive system. Perfect eyes. And a tail. A long, thick, prehensile tail. Useful for opening the door whith both hands full of groceries, and for, eh, play. I would like a tail.
• This arm is your arm! This arm is iArm! A brand new forearm, we can supply-arm! If you've been mutilated, or amputated, iArm has charm, and it's quite lightweighted.
• Ooo, yeah, a long prehensile tail. That would rule.
• I just could`nt bring myself to post Ipenis, I tried several times, but backed out each time. However now that it`s been said I want to be second in line.
• Third the long, prehensile waggable furry tail.
• (fucking Furries.)
• iEyes: aye.
• Never thought I'd have to get in line for an iPenis. However, I'd require mine to be prehensile. Screw this prehensile tail stuff... I want to crush the throats of my enemies with my penis. Effective AND embarrassing. Heh. And naturally, with any bionic parts, I'd need Col. Austin's sound effects. Get my penis to unzip my pants, and 'shzngshzngshzng!' Awesome! Hopefully, it won't look like it's in slow-mo, though. (Hey -- kit -- I've got a slightly wonky little finger on my left hand too. Matches the one on my right. BOO!)
• Aah, who am I kidding? I wouldn't upgrade my penis. I've grown attached to it. Just tell me the Orgasmatron will be developed in my lifetime...
• Well heck, if we can add parts rather than just replace existing bit, then I'll take four additional arms. Like Ganesh. I could then practice the piano and pet cats at the same time. Now that's what I call real ultimate power.
• Capt. Renault, don't look now.... I would like kitty cat ears, definitely better eyes and a detachable third arm. The third arm socket should fit stuff like laser, USB plug, egg-beater, etc...
• From a link on that BBC page, I ended up staring at the Vielle stimulator. Oh. Boy.
• Flagpole, ???Look at that thing? From Alnedra post "Dr Stuart Meloy, from North Carolina, told New Scientist: "I thought people would be beating my door down." hehe "beating my door down."
• Alnedra -- I read the headline too fast, once again. It came across as: "...scientist claiming to have invented a device which produces orgasms...can't find button..." I thought that would have been the first problem they solved, but upon rereading it correctly, it proved to be much less amusing. Thanks for the link, though!
• Kinda puts this this one to shame now, doesn't it! I'd prefer to see the feline version of this: the iPaw!!! Imagine swiveling paws with titanium claws that could pierce the thickest of skin within nanoseconds.
• Brain. Upload current mind to a machine, install machine in head. Multitasking several copies of one's mind would be useful.