June 27, 2005
Bee Bid Record Fails
- I tried to make that headline parse as beedly as possible in order to create a buzz.
Irish beekeeper Phil 'Mad Bastard' McCabe has failed to take the world record for attracting the most bees onto his body after only managing a mere 200,000-strong bee bodystocking. With pix.
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Let me bee the first to say: wacky!
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One single little bee quietly sitting on MY arm is a freakin' world's record, as far as I'm concerned. Two would involve a mad dash for a flyswatter and a gallon of insecticide.
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when I wears a queen upon my chin my mouth stays closed so the bees won't stroll in and this poor dear man at age fifty-nine can find nothing better to do with his time
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He's covered in beeeeeeeeeeees!
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Apart from that weird bit by his belly button - ew!
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Beeeeeeesswacky! Ye beee the one!
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Mad Bastard McCabe dared outgrabe The nameless hero of bee-covered fabe. The masses he swore to boggle Dressed in his underpants and goggles. But tho he wore the bee-knit sweater It's plain he could have done much better. How could he elevate his chance? Get to work on the bee-knit pants. (no really, check out the pic! If he had bee pants he would have won!)
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Listen, would you risk having 30,000 bees hanging off your tockley?
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Hmmm. Good point.
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Had Mad Bastard MacCabe only affixed a queen to his [censored] he'd become that most picturesque of birds, a beecock.
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*points to exit
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Here is a sad example of how NOT to behave if you disturb a hive. Cumulative stings can cause severe reactions even in people who have never had a serious reaction to being stung before. Get into a house, or a pond, or simply run like hell a good distance away from the enraged hive. For pity's sake, don't assume you can somehow 'ward them off'.