June 03, 2005

• Waste of good bier, if'n du fragst mich.
• ooo, i love chances to use an online translator! Drink or splash? This difficult question stands from immediately in the Austrian Tarrenz (Tyrol). For there the first beer-Schwimmbad of the world opens today. Vacation book • load minute: vacation on the last click • Top package holidays into the entire world • Cheap trip: Europe-Trips for little money • Hotels: worldwide the prettiest lodgings •Vacations park: price-valued families vacation • Rent vehicle: favorable prices vats large in 46 countries seven, filled with the favorite drink of the men – who does not dream there abzusaufen, already in the bathing strongly?
• Markus Amann (23), manager the „Starkenberger beer myth“: „I would swim than swallow rather, serve a fresh plug cool we then at the basin edge.“ Experience world of large Highlight the 4000 square meters including medieval castle: seven beer pools. Each is filled with approximately 20,000 liter Gerstensaft. To be sure the beer flows in no way fresh plug out of the rooster. The original Gärbottiche out of noble steel are filled with the so-called Biergeläger, that remainder yeast, that drops itself in the brewing in the beer tank.
• monkeyfilter: serve a fresh plug cool we then at the basin edge.
• Das bier steigt in meinen arsch!
• ha! you needn't speak german to understand THAT feeling, chy.
• according to Gizmodo, it's not proper beer in those pools, it's *wort* which is pre-beer - no alcohol, lots of bacteria, incredibly sticky. Sign me up! not
• C'mon, Fes, don't you want that smooth, creamy Sgt. Schultz complexion? Gizmodo has it wrong. The bath-waters consist of a spent beer-yeast sediment (Biergeläger) that (I gather) rises to the top of the fermentation tank during lagering, subsequently diluted with water. It's not raw sticky wort, ugh.
• If it's spent beer yeast, it's going to end up at the bottom of the fermenter. The lagering process actually helps that to drop out of solution, and the professional grade fermenters look less like tubs and more like big metal funnels. To aid in clarity for unfiltered beer, there's a little spigot thingamabob (auf Deutsch: "Spigottentingemebahb") at the very bottom of the funnel, where they let out the dead yeasties when their eating sugar/pissing booze/farting CO2 job is complete. Either way, I'm skipping the tubbin'.
• Create your own at home with a keg, a bathtub and a bunsen burner! Next week: fondue tub!
• My mistake: it does indeed fall to the bottom of the Biertank. I really should reread Papazian someday. Thanks, Fes.
• In a fondue tub, no one knows when you cut the cheese. Bwa!! get it?? GET IT? It's melted cheese in the tub, then you "cut the cheese"...! Comedy is wasted on you people.
• beer and yeast related factoid: most beers are "force-carbonated" meaning they pump CO2 through them until it dissolves in solution and carbonates the beer. Most small vat- and home-brewers leave the yeast in and add a bit of sugar to each bottle/keg/whateva to "bottle condition." The yeast smells the sugar, wakes back up, and starts eating again. The bottles are sealed, so the CO2 expelled from the yeast gets trapped inside the bottle and redissolves into the beer, carbonating it. Takes about a week. The interesting part is that champagn is also bottle conditioned. Most wines are filtered to get out the twigs, stems, yeast, mud, bandaids, etc, but champagne makers leave the yeast in and bottle condition the wine to get the signature bubbles (regular wine = no carbonation). But how do they get out the yeast? Same way (sorta) as beer brewers do - when champagne is bottled, they initially use a temporary seal. They have special racks to hold the champagne bottles upside down and, when the wine is bubbly, they remove the temporary cap, remove the yeast (now sitting dead in the bottleneck) and recap with the regular champagne cork. In related news, while most beer yeasts can only handle about 4% alcohol before it dies? Champagne yeast is much hardier, and often brewers will use champagn yeast to heighten the alcohol content of their beers (I once made a Kolsch that ran nearly 14% alcohol - we called it "two bottle kolsch").
• My pleasure, Herr Goetter.
• I take it that with lager, you swim at the bottom, and ale, you swim at the top? Either way, I'm not sampling the merchandise. Never has my fear of pool-urination been so great.
• A beer bath? Oh, that must be where Mr. Mickey went last weekend. And it's wonderful to see you around here again, goetter.
• A Mr.!?!? Mazel Tov!
• To be sure the beer flows in no way fresh plug out of the rooster. That's what I've been trying to tell you!!
• That fucking rooster. Plug that rooster or the beer flows out. Sheeeit. If you don't know that, you don't know nothing. I can't tell you how many times that rooster leaked out my beer. Gotta be a fresh plug. They don't tell you that in beer school.
• Is it just me, or does this whole concept bring to mind Guy Maddin's The Saddest Music in the World, y'know, those scenes when the winners of each round of the Saddest Music contest slide down glass slides into a huge vat of beer? Because, y'know, I've always wanted to try that.
• The rooster's such a cock!
• P.S. -- Solch ein Hahn des Hahns!
• P.P.S. -- The foregoing German statement, which I got from babelfish, translates back (on babelfish) to "Such a cock of the cock!". Ergo, I am led to believe that what we're talking about swimming in here is not in fact beer at all, but cockpunch. The Germans are an inscrutable lot.
• I emailed this to all my coworkers as a new and brilliant marketing scheme for our microbrewery (did you monkeys know that I work for a microbrewery? Yes!) and they are fascinated and horrified. I still think it has enormous potential.