May 24, 2005

• (oh, yeah, audio is NSFW)
• Whoa. I've heard clips of these set to music and incorporated into a brilliant mix.
• Is it possible that this guy posting fifty-odd voicemails to a custom-built website shows just as much compulsive behaviour as the girl making those calls in the first place? Just askin'. And if I can give buddy any advice -- don't poke the bear. Seriously. Dude. Do Not Poke The Bear.
• Wow. Fucking Therapy.
• There are sites up now dispelling this as a hoax, but I dunno...sounds real enough, and hits close to home. I had an ex leave 39 messages in one afternoon. They also ran the gamut, from "How could you do this to me" to "I just took a bunch of sleeping pills" to "I hate you" to "I love you" to "I'll ruin your fucking life" to "Please, baby, call me back". I get nauseous even thinking about it now. And yes, she was beautiful to look at.
• Capt.Renault:Is it possible that this guy posting fifty-odd voicemails to a custom-built website shows just as much compulsive behaviour as the girl making those calls in the first place? I think they should get together. A perfect relationship in the offing there.
• I hear calls like this all of the time for Harrassing Phone Calls cases that I represent people for. It is routine. If this is a hoax, it does not really matter as this happens all the time. It is yet another downfall of cellphones. People are less likely to leave these messages on a regular phone as there is a chance someone else might hear them. I had to listen to tapes of a client of mine just last week. One message itself said something like, "You better come over here and get your stuff now, you fucking cunt. When you get over here, I am going to beat your fucking ass." That just makes no internal logical sense. If he wants her to come over, surely he does not think that telling her he is going to harm her when she does is going to give her any incentive to come over?
• Another thing about the pretty ones: they also rip the stankiest farts. I was introduced to the concept of the "dutch oven" by a girl who did catalog modelling, and let me tell you, she was pretty as a lark, but she could knock the same right out of a tree on a day with no wind.
• too much information!
• And to answer the question: The pretty ones are always insane because they have spent the better part of their lives focusing on what they look like and what others think of their appearance than they do anything that has any real meaning.
• I have to agree with that. There are always exceptions of course.
• If there were no exceptions, then we would need no rules.
• It may be factual, it may be cruel... (come on, we're on an Aaron Neville roll here)
• what happened to the poor cat?
• Don't kid yourselves...they're all insane.
• If there were no execptions I'd only eat salad.
• So, what are you saying rocket? That you don't want to be with me? I keed. Really. Ex-husbands do this too. *shudder*
• All I have to say is that they're both shmucks (if this is true). From the context of several of her early messages, this douche was stringing her along... probably for booty calls, and preying on her co-dependency and vulnerability. Fuck 'em both...
• It's not so much that the pretty ones are insane as that the nonpretty insane ones aren't on the market in the first place. As a member of this demographic, take my word for it. I'm doing you a favor. ;) Guys will still gladly date a flaky or even psycho girl if she's hot enough, so guys' only brush with Teh Crazy is through this avenue. As for [sane, hot], well, I'd guess they're taken.
• And that is another issue. If a woman is truly cruel or crazy and she is not attractive, then she is going to have a very difficult time finding people who will put up with her behavior. If she is truly cruel or crazy and very attractive, then she will have no problem finding people who will allow her to act that way.
• I married an exception. But she only farts while laughing uncontrollably or working out.
• Another thing about the pretty ones: they also rip the stankiest farts. In my experience, the only thing worse than a woman fart is a dog fart. Which is why it's good that women don't eat dog food.
• "Another thing about the pretty ones: they also rip the stankiest farts." Nothing says lovin' like something from the oven.
• about the pretty ones: they also rip the stankiest farts Everyone's flatus are gross. It's that hot women know they can get away with them. "Oh, dearie, that was cute..."
• We aren't, you fucking bastard! Seen your cat lately? *does 17 lines of coke, cuts your face out of all the 'couple' pictures, cuts wrists, changes mind, puts on Band-aids, goes to club for all the free drinks the suckers will pony up before I start throwing glasses at their heads*
• The original site was around a long time ago, under www.psychoexgirlfriend.com. After awhile, he took some of the MP3s down ... but only after I had copied them to CD. I didn't check each link here (any actually), but if any are missing, I have them all saved if anyone wants them :)
• *does 17 lines of coke, cuts your face out of all the 'couple' pictures, cuts wrists, changes mind, puts on Band-aids, goes to club for all the free drinks the suckers will pony up before I start throwing glasses at their heads* Unless your significant other is suffering from a cold, decides to clean a gutshot muskrat, decides to do just that while you collapse, green gilled and deeply disgusticated, to the floor. Then your take on female farts tends to become a bit more magnanimus. I feel lightheaded just recalling this episode (okay - I feel lightheaded most of the time.)
• if it is a hoax it isn't funny, if it's real, this Rick shithead (yep, just look at his picture, you can tell!) is a jerk for putting someone else's bad relationship online.. either way, after two it was boring....
• *walks into club, looks around, sees girl at bar with band-aids on her wrists* Hi...can I buy you a drink?
• "which is why its good that women don't eat dog food" mct, if you weren't already married, and I weren't already married...well all I gotta say is that I KNOW that nothing says love like a dutch oven (ask mr. medusa!!! go ahead, ask him) as far as I am aware I am generally considered pretty, and pretty fucking crazy >:D cue maniacal laughter
• see? I told you guys...
• "either way, after two it was boring...." Well, I don't know about that. My wife and I have been stalked by my wife's youngest's ex for the last couple of years. We've been approached by her while shopping for groceries and whatnot as well as hassled over the phone at odd times. For such as us this might just apply in some way. You tend to feel for all parties involved, but it might be useful to get some feedback from others who have experienced similar situations. I wouldn't dismiss it all as rank paranoia, myself; there's a lot of nutjobs wandering around out there, so I personally believe this may be of some value, approached with critical thought in mind. Long's she doesn't show up with a gun's what is all I'm saying . . . It's a challenge not to give in to paranoia, certainly - extremes only offer more of the same, really.
• *checks out Medusa, nods appreciatively* *runs away screaming*
• All these messages and no one has mentioned our very own crazy ex-girlfriend????
• Thought that was gonna be a link to "best of the web, this ain't", for sure!
• I remember there being one message about "Give me back my cat, Mark" spawning a t-shirt that said "All your cats are belong to Mark"
• What is this "dutch oven" you're referring to? Or should I know?
• ok, my husband's name is Mark so now I REALLY want one of those t'shirts!!! cynnbad, ask yrself...do you REALLY want to know that??
• cynnbad- imagine constructing an oxygen tent, wherein the walls are actually bedsheets, and the 'oxygen' is actually, well, methane. Imagine living with someone who finds it fun to produce vast quantities of said methane the better to force you to be confined within said tent. Voila - Dutch Oven. Good times, good times.
• "Bandwidth Limit Exceeded"
• Dutch oven? Prelude to the cleveland steamer?
• Our whole damn bedroom turns into a dutch oven when my husband is in there. I refuse to enter until a torch has been lit to burn off said gasses. The room practically floats at times!
• The not-so-pretty ones? Just as crazy.
• The not-so-pretty ones have had some previous experience of rejection and how to deal with it.
• Yeah, but we're still crazy.
• I mean they are! THEY ARE! THEY'RE STILL CRAZY!
• From a Patton Oswald performance: You want crazy? This is crazy. I wake up at 3 in the morning, and my girlfriend is carving my name in her arm with a bobbie pin. "What are you doing??" I ask. "Oh, don't worry about this," she says. "This is just so I can come when you punch me."
• The pretty ones are indeed crazy. Most of my exes were nuts in one way or another. Then again, I'm not exactly stable...
• Hence the name 'surlyboi', hmm?
• All crazy girls are pretty /= All pretty girls are crazy. Personally, I'm both. Just don't break up with me and everything will be fine. Fine. Really fine. But I've always found that maybe 4 or 5 psycho phone calls, a couple letters, and possibly one slightly evil stunt suffice. Bwah. &etc.
• Letr's face it, it's their wackiness what lures us, lusty, unbalanced male monkeys. And then we wonder and get surprised when they fling glasses at the wall, threaten with waking up the neighbours in their pj's and show up at work unannounced? Meh. /takes out strand of purple-dyed hair, sniffs it, locks it away