April 25, 2005

A celebration of non-penetration
WARNING: This site contains descriptions of graphic sexual abstinence and offers abstinence-only education based on the strictest most literal interpretations of the Bible. This material is not suitable for the young or easily offended.
Look out for the pix!!
posted by Skrik 19 years ago
  • Here's some fun things that faith partners can do besides have sex. 1) Go out to a movie or watch TV! Make some popcorn and have a popcorn party! 2) Engage in wholesome sports activities or play board games like checkers, chess or Monopoly! 3) Rigorously rub your face, body and genitalia against those of your faith partner until orgasm. (Also known as 'faith-fucking') Heh, there's no way this is for real. A popcorn party, full of faith-fuckers?
  • For the gals: When hugging or kissing your faith partner, you may have noticed a little something getting hard inside his pants. It's called the penis and it means he wants to marry you! That was hilarious, )))
  • "As far as the Lord’s concerned, it’s Beaver Season all year ‘round." Hallelujah! Praise Hee-IM!
  • And don't miss the Ask Dr. Frist: "Dear Doctor Frist, You recently implied it was possible to contract AIDS through tears and that simply touching another persons genitals could result in pregnancy. Is this true? Signed, Young and Scared Dear Young and Scared, When I said that you could get AIDS from tears what I meant was that getting AIDS could make you cry. Also, you CAN get pregnant from simply touching another person's genitals, providing they're ejaculating and you're touching them with your cervix. I hope this clears things up for you. Remember also that whenever you masturbate, God kills a kitten. Yours Truly, Senate Majority Leader, Dr. Bill Frist"
  • Hilarious stuff! "Beaver Season all year 'round" Thank the sweet and juicy lord!
  • I love the anal abstinence pictures.
  • All I know is that one woman I was with for awhile had "abstained" for a lengthy period in her younger days... and she had skills I could not freakin believe.
  • God loves to watch people have sex.
  • Remember, the keys to heaven are in your pants. ...as are the keys to a few other things...