What? Do you make Big Bird small? Do you tell the Count to start spelling things? Do you force Bert and Ernie to stop with the hot gay sex?
This is sacrilege.
This is terribly wrong.
I think you mean Differently Sized Bird.
I swear to God, it just amazes me, political correctness run amok. The whole point of Cookie Monster, the whole reason kids love him, is that he can't control himself! He does what they'd love to do but know they shouldn't! And because of that, he's valuable, as a place for kids to viscerally live out a fantasy (eat all the cookies! woo hoo!) they *know* they can't really live out. I'd go so far as to argue that Cookie Monster's outrageous appetite for cookies can help kids set boundaries and pursue moderation.
Not to mention that doing this kills the joke. The joke deserves respect, dammit! People with master's degrees in education should be banned from killing jokes!
Damn it, this pisses me off!
Next up, Monster playing smooth jazz with brushes....
He's going to try different kinds of cookies too. I hope they're not Snackwells. Those kind of suck. Peanut butter or gingerbread ones would be good. Bill Frist & Elmo. That upcoming episode with Alicia Keys sounds neat.
i say we organize some kind of boycott where everyone eats twice as many cookies as usual.
I think that this started it all. It's a slippery slope. Domino effect and all...
*shudder*
I'm really sorry. I promise I'll check my HTML next time.
Cookie Monster is meant to vicariously be the raging id that kids are learning to rein in!
He's funny because he scarfs down a plate of cookies, and then the plate.
There is nothing wrong with teaching children moderation. In fact, it is the job of adults (parents) and society to instill those concepts (moderation, health, delayed gratification) in its children so they can grow up to be healthy, well-adjusted, productive members of society.
Yet western culture would appear to have become a place in which no adult has the self-control or moderation with which to be an example for the young'uns. We are obsessed with the myth of having our cake, eating it and looking like a supermodel. We are bombarded with advertisements that promise that just such improbable things are possible (just take this pill!)
There is nothing wrong with Cookie Monster's lack of self-control, CM is not representing the adult world, he is a figure for children to identify with, a being who cannot always excercise self-restraint. It would appear that we live in a world in which such an icon (!) is deemed so threatening by the adult masses of tv & entertainment production that his very raison d'etre is being diluted & undermined.
I feel sorry for the children who are being raised in this culture. I hope their parents are able to find ways to undermine these pernicious messages!
Its a sad day for cookie-eating fools everywhere.
lowers cookie to half-mast
smallish bear, my shudder was at this topic, not your post!!
I think sesame st. is simply acknowledging that irony is really and truly dead. Cookie monster is obsolete.
Cookies weren't the problem. It was when Cookie Monster hit the 'hooch that he started to act weird.
"OhHHh! Bourbon da brownest of da liquors!! *Ahh-glug-glug-glug-glug-glug*"
/firmly in pro-excess-cookie camp
The point of Sesame Street is to educate kids first and to entertain them second. They have decided that Cookie Monster was going against one of the things that they are trying to teach kids. I have no problem in the world with this.
A few years ago they decided that Big Bird's friend, the brown elephant guy whose name was Mr. Snuffelluffuggus or something like that, was encouraging kids to have imaginary friends, so they decided to show that he was not really imaginary by allowing other people to see him. That didn't get as much press, of course, because no one (myself included) knows how to spell Mr. Snuffelluffuggus.
thanks pb, I am now craving bourbon n chocolate chip cookies in mid-afternoon....yikes!
This actually made me want to cry.
That does it! I'm never watching Sesame Street again!
It totally freaked me out the first time I saw the show and everyone was interacting with Snuffy. He's imaginary! Why is Bob talking to him?! sigh.
pass the bourbon.
Oh, please. Does anyone really think the old Cookie Monster caused kids to eat too many cookies? This is wasted do-gooder energy.
Won't somebody think of the children?!
sorry.
*pours a full glass, passes patita the bourbon*
A few years ago they decided that Big Bird's friend, the brown elephant guy whose name was Mr. Snuffelluffuggus or something like that, was encouraging kids to have imaginary friends, so they decided to show that he was not really imaginary by allowing other people to see him.
What's wrong with having an imaginary friend? I had one when I was a kid. His name was Maynard, and he was a pretty cool guy. I used to share my seat with him. Occasionally the fucker would shove me out of the chair for a laugh, but mostly he was a right guy. /notjoking
I am UTTERLY impressed that your childhood imaginary friend's name was Maynard...utterly.
I think Sesame jumped the shark around 1980 or whenever it was they changed the original theme music and the tracking footage along the road at the end. The 'pinball song' (sung by the pointer sisters) is the epitome of the best era of sesame.
And Elmo. When Elmo appeared, that was it. All over.
Let's have a cookie-eating sit down strike to protest this! We can do it from our homes. MMMMM, cookies.
But, yeah, when my daughter watched Sesame Street all those years ago, I really thought that Cookie Monster taught that those who would eat bunches of cookies by stuffing them into their mouths till shards fell out on the floor, were not very cool. I mean, he was the anti-cookie eater, in a way. Plus, unless parents are buying or baking cookies daily, where would the kids get their fix if Cookie was a real threat?
I really think that giving kids stuff for daily drinks like soda or KoolAid, instead of milk or water, is much more of a problem. That was common, in my experience, beginning in the '70s. I still see that relating to my grand nieces and nephews.
Maybe they should fight battles that are real.
I was always bummed that I didn't have any imaginary friends. I even complained to my parents about it. "Mom, how come I don't I have imaginary friends? It's not fair!" I wasn't going to make one up, though, cause that would've been cheating.
Maybe it's the butter that's being used in Cookie Monster's cookies? Is this really about the War On Drugs?
>The point of Sesame Street is to educate kids first and to entertain them second.
I have to take issue with this on behalf of Mr. McLuhan. The only thing you learn from watching TV is how to like watching TV. The point of Sesame Street is to give parents an opportunity to go upstairs for a while (not that I'm against that). Dispensing 'responsible' messages about cookies is a silly idea thought up by people who would like to appear to be Doing Something About The Problem.
The only thing you learn from watching TV is how to like watching TV.
Strangely, mine seems to dispense all sorts of useful and educational content, as well as a good deal of art. Should I get it seen to?
>Strangely, mine seems to dispense all sorts of useful and educational content, as well as a good deal of art.
Uh-huh. That'd be why the US is reknowned as a well-educated nation of artists. It's a good thing kids aren't growing up watching 7 hours of crass garbage every day- you'd probably see some effects from that in the Populace.
How's that for pointlessly argumentative and crabby? Sorry. Obviously it's possible to find decent stuff on TV once in a while, though you've got to admit the ratios aren't good. But people, particularly kids I think, don't generally watch TV because they're hungry for knowledge. They watch it because they're learning to enjoy spending a certain number of hours per day in a passive, semivegetative state, soaking up the booty shaking and the floating hamburgers and the strobing lights and so on. Calling this 'educational' is like putting on a foreign language tape while shooting heroin, and then claiming that doing heroin is helping you learn Spanish, and is therefore educational.
My television set is not located in the US.
stan, you will be hard-pressed to find someone more anti-television than I am. And I could not agree more with what you say about most children's programming being designed to hypnotize the kids. But Sesame Street, as I remember it, was not like other programming for children. I watched it because there was almost no programming on television for children outside of 8-12 Saturday morning. I remember it being educational. Now, with children's programming being on television 24 hours a day, I have to wonder how many kids are even watching television.
Plus, back to the whole issue about Cookie Monster, it is worth pointing out that Sesame Street is doing this of their own accord. They have not been pressured into this by the government or some lobbying organization. As such, it is not a sellout in my book. They are doing it because they think that it is the right thing to do. And, hell, it generated a lot of free press for their show.
Actually, that'd be a great FPP, Wolof. Some kind of presentation of the various states of different countries' television programming.
"The only thing you learn from watching TV is how to like watching TV."
Bullshit. Not only is this demonstrably false by observing the games kids play, and the things they utter, after watching tv, but I can tell you from personal experience that Sesame Street had a major effect on me, as a tiny kid, in helping me remember the alphabet, etc. In fact, I was reading before I went to school partly because of Sesame (although having parents who surrounded me with piles of 'little golden books' & other neat stuff was the major factor).
But isn't cramming biscuits into your gob and making a terrible mess what eating them is all about?
I learnt my table manners from the blue guy, ferchrissakes!
Actually, that'd be a great FPP
Well, away you go!
Wolof, I wouldn't presume to take the honor of creating the FPP from the one who truly deserves that honor. So, please, you go ahead.
Australians know as much about good TV as a Guildford-based gnat knows about Beijing.
Oi!posted by guildfordgnat at 12:21PM UTC on April 08, 2005
Perhaps the 'reformed Cookie Monster' thing is actually a mordant satire on the nanny state, lampooning the tyranny of political correctness? We need to ask a three-year-old.
If you don't like the new cookie monster, don't watch it. Problem solved.
I blame cookie monster for my uncontrolable habit of eating Letters.
>Sesame Street had a major effect on me, as a tiny kid, in helping me remember the alphabet
Yeah- but we are a nation of people who mostly know how to read, but do not read. Remembering the alphabet is not the same thing as loving to read. If you learn how to read by watching television, there's a good chance that you will know how to read, and love to watch television. And the information that is available to people who love to read is of a very different quality and kind than that that is available to people who love to watch television.
I'm not suggesting that Sesame Street is the focus of evil in the modern world, or anything. I'm just suggesting that a better way to teach your kids to read is to read books with them, and a better way to teach them not to eat too many cookies is to not, yourself, make a frequent habit of eating too many cookies.
>Not only is this demonstrably false by observing the games kids play, and the things they utter
Boy, you've got me there- they can also pick up foul language and inappropriately sexualized behavior at an early age. I forgot about that stuff...
Nice derail, Stan. We already had an anti-TV thread about two weeks back...it didn't go well. It seems people don't like to be told what to do with their own free time, or their children's free time. Go figure.
Let's look at the facts -- Cookie Monster has been gorging himself silly on cookies and plates for what, thirty-five years now? It would seem as though he's not subject to any major health concerns. Some may say obesity (the focus of this change of diet), but I would suggest that a) he was always that size, b) we shouldn't be projecting human requirements onto Monster physiology, and c) all middle-aged males can stand to lose some weight, anyway, so what's the big deal?
Compare Cookie Monster's 'bad' eating habits to that of clean-cut square Casey from Mr. Dressup. Where's Casey now? D-E-A-D. Years of healthy living didn't save THAT puppet.
Res ipsa loquitor. Q.E.D.
Chow down, friend.
As CM would say...That's good enough for me.
>It seems people don't like to be told what to do with their own free time, or their children's free time.
I would never presume to tell anybody else what to do with their spare time. I believe I will say what I think about it, though. I mean, I'll check with you first, naturally.
I just think it's irresponsible to expose children to these sorts of Anti-Cookie messages, that's all. It's all part of The Homosexual Agenda- mark my words...
We already had an anti-TV thread about two weeks back...
Au Contraire mon ami - it was not anti-TV, though TV indeed is a smouldering odoriforous dung-pile of moldy barf . . i digress.
At any rate, I think we can all agree that Mr. C. Monster affected us all in some way - hence our presence in this particular thread - and that that is in some way yet a reflection of TV's effect.
pass the bourbon cookies.
I am more concerned about the effect Cookie Monster's recent statements may have on childhood ungrammaticality. Surely that should be "Me eat fewer cookies"?
Cookie Monster is a testament to the fact that we all have a set-point regarding our weight. He has been downing mass quantities of cookies for more that 35 years and has never gained a pound! He has found a way to eat what he wants yet still maintain a weight which enables him to remain active and healthy. Let the friggin' monster eat his cookies!
lol! "Me eat fewer cookies." lol!
Oh, please. Does anyone really think the old Cookie Monster caused kids to eat too many cookies? This is wasted do-gooder energy.
I think this is the key misconception here. No one ever said that Cookie Monster was encouraging or contributing to the problem of poor eating habits in children. They acknowledged that it is a problem, and that's it- no one said anything about what causes or contributes to it. Regardless of the cause, Sesame Street producers are taking the opportunity to use Cookie Monster to help solve the problem. That's what they do. They take these characters that kids love, and they use them to teach kids good habits and manners and lessons and all that. Cookie Monster still eats cookies, so just relax! In fact, from what I read, it seems like his character is virtually unchanged. They just featured him in a skit to teach kids that they shouldn't eat sweets all day long. That does not imply that anyone thought kids were doing so because they saw Cookie Monster doing it. It doesn't imply anything about what the producers see as the causes of children's poor eating habits. I think you're all over-reacting a bit.
Smallish bear...he's called "Cookie Monster" for a reason fer chrissake! He's not called "Moderate Consumer of Baked Goods Ambassador"! He's a blue furry monster that gobbles down cookies. We don't want him to start preaching moderation. What next? Is he going to become the spokesperson spokesmonster for low carb diets? Sheesh!
For Cookie Monster, moderation might be the key to healthy living but it's not the key to happy living. CM's been forced to subject his true nature in order to fit in with the herd and he's never been about that; he's a free spirit. He was, that is. What's next? Putting Oscar the Grouch in anger management classes? Man, ever since Mr. Hooper died that block just hasn't been the same.
The show jumped the shark when Elmo joined the cast.
So true, rocket. Damned red menace.
Just went to jumptheshark.com to verify. Indeed, 122 voted for Elmo, with Snuffy being able to be seen by others finishing second with less than that. Then the next highest is 16 or so. I shall study closely to monitor who quickly the Cookie Monster thing ascends the JumpTheShark ladder.
I will turn in a full report to the Board of Directors at MonkeyFilter no later than June 4, 2005.
Elmo is the bane of all things good and bright.
That being said, aren't all cookies meatless?
>That being said, aren't all cookies meatless?
It is a little-known fact that bacon bits and chocolate chips can be used interchangeably in most cookie recipes.
Yeah, dammit! I'm so fuggin sick of that stinki' green grouch getting to shoot off his mouth and eveytime IIIIII try to say some tiny dog-dammed critical thing the polite police come pissin' on my doorstep. Well, sheeeet, I've had enough of this crap.
Bacon Bit Cookies? I knew the BBC were behind the Teletubbies, but this explains a lot.
About Cookie Monster: my fiance just pointed out that Cm never actually eats any cookies - he just crunches them, plate and all. All the cookies end up in crumbs on the floor. This explains the lack of weight gain.
About Mr Snuffalupagus: He was never imaginary - Big Bird just had this insanely bad luck about anyone ever meeting him. All the kids in the audience knew he was real. It was just like Polkaroo, only not quite so obvious. I had thought they ended the not being seen by other people because they felt the joked had been milked as far as the writers wanted to take it; this thing about imaginary friends is just stupid - imaginary friends help you develop your imagination. For whatever reason, Mr S lost most of his appeal when he stopped being the friend that we all knew was real but no one else on the show believed in.
That said, the whole of Sesame Street lost its appeal when it became 1/3 Elmo's world.
jb, are you saying Cookie Monster is... bulimic?
Gimme that damn bourbon.
Naw, just that he lacks an esophagus. Most muppets do.
That this silliness constitutes "worthy news" baffles me! We're talking about a mop of synthetic rayon fibers dyed with Blue #400! This was front-page news on many U.S. news websites (perhaps people are getting bored of the "Jacko" case?), and has since made the front page of the BBC news website [though the Brits refer to his cookies as "biscuits"]. Gimmeafukkin break! As a child I went nutty over cookie monster![in a good way!] I loved his free-wheeling craziness. Perhaps those silly blokes at Sesame Street should worry less about putting Elmo in jogging shorts and focus on "keeping it real." Cookie Monster never altered my eating habits - I had a MOTHER who shaped that. Funny that they take on this new "Healthy Living" stance, yet they inject parodies in the new season as well: 'Desperate Houseplants' 'Grouch Eye for the Nice Guy' 'Donald Grump'! As if children don't get enough mindless dribble as it is... I'm waiting for Big Bird to come out in a Visa Check Card-endorsed sweat shirt.
cookies are biscuits? Then what are biscuits called?
Well, see, Americans don't understand scones. Scones aren't meant to be served cold, rock-solid and full of fruit. They're best straight from the oven with a big glob of jam and some whipped cream. Scones as I know 'em are halfway between biscuits and scones in the US. My favourites have cheese in them, which you'd think would be weird with jam and cream, but isn't.
They also rhyme with "gone".
Australians know as much about good TV as a Guildford-based gnat knows about Beijing.
The modern world seems to be passing somebody by.
They also rhyme with "gone"
But I've heard people in UK pronounce it like it rhymes with "stone".
You think that's confusing - in Canada, we have a third set of names! (Okay, we just basically call what the Americans call biscuits and scones - I've been told the first is savory, the second is sweet - all biscuits. And my mom's baking powder biscuits are better than even the best scones I've had in England).
I think Sesame Street totally is worthy news. It's a really important cultural phenomenon. And they always had silly parodies - the only difference is that now we are the adults who understand them. (Actually, for some reason, I always got the "Monsterpiece Theatre" parody, yet I didn't watch the real thing until I was much older - though to day, I always hear Alistair Cookie instead of Alistair Cooke when thinking of the phrase "And now, welcome, to Mooonsterpiece Theeaaatre!").
I love the Sesame Street memories - but only because I'm a 70s baby, 80s kid. We all love the era we grew up with best - for me, that was secret Mr Snuffalupagus, Mr Hooper, then Dave, lots of Ernie and Bert. And the Tweedlebugs! Elmo is a little annoying, because his character is really more like something from Blues Clues - designed for children alone, not for adults and children together. But a new generation will really like him.
so wait - "skuns" for breakfast? cookies are biscuits??
Waaahhhhh!
*runs to GramMa*
Actually - I said that confusingly. I meant a third way of naming, with only "cookie" and "biscuit" - "scone" is only used by Anglophiles wanting to sound posh, or to (rarely) to refer to the Scottish oatmeal scone, which is hard and dry.
You strange furriners!
Scones (said like 'stones') are a type of fried sweet bread that you slather with butter and honey before having a heart attack.
Cookies are cookies, served for desert (my favorites are Oatmeal and shortbread.
Biscuits are like bread and served with a meal.
Crackers come in Saltines, Wheat Thins, Ritz, and Grahams
There there, Pete, have one of GramMa's homemade oatmeal-raisin cookies. Or Toll-House, if you likey the choco-chips.
scones (ryhmes with gone (s)) are like a stodgy cake, delicious with jam & cream like the bashi says. I happen to like them more the next day when they've gone ever so slightly stale.
biscuits are smaller, flatter, crunchier and thought of by Americans as cookies.
Cookies are bigger than a biscuit, sometimes a bit soft, and usually full of choc chips.
Dat's what I think.
Don't get me started on muffins though...
Muffins are oversized cupcakes, aren't they?
*dodges out of kitfisto's way
RaaAAaaaaaarrrrr...
*goes all the way up to eleven...*
"Muffins" are a woman's breasts, and are usually not crunchy or full of chocolate chips. They are often best served warm with jam and cream, though are also delightful if served slightly chilled and rubbed on the face. I'd recommend a lager or pilsner to accompany it, something with a clean finish.
I feel soiled just reading that...
MCT and kitfisto win the coffe-nose award for this thread. Hoo!
Okay, seriously - who buys me the new keyboard?
Thanks GramMa, oatmeal raisin suits me just fine . .
from dictionary.com:
Muffin: A small, cup-shaped quick bread, often sweetened.
Cupcake: A small cake baked in a cup-shaped container.
Quickbread: A bread made with a leavening agent, such as baking powder, that expands during baking and requires no leavening period beforehand.
Cake: A sweet baked food made of flour, liquid, eggs, and other ingredients, such as raising agents and flavorings.
so, in all, muffins are less sweet.
That's what you may think...
English muffins are the thinner, more bread like ones. Nice for brekky with jam and peanut butter (curse you, America, for showing me that).
American muffins are like big cup cakes and nice after your tea. Asda sell nice choccy choc chip ones, 4 for £1.20 or something.
Did you know that the Count is actually a Russian mobster?
Since this is the internet, of course there's a petition...
Only 357 signatures? Come on!
*signs electronically*
Muffins are not cupcakes!
And scones are baking powder biscuits. Or deep fried Ojibway cornbread.
Hmm, I have been told that in UK, muffins are same as muffins in US, but not as large. "English muffin" is a misnomer. A cupcake is just a convenient method of delivering "sugar-crack" to your blood stream without having to resort to using syringes... Alas, they are known as "fairy cakes" in the UK.
And DAMNIT! No one has mentioned crumpets!
Hmmm, so crumpets here in the US go 'round disguised as English Muffins? I see the plot against us now! You Brits are trying to drive us crackers.
Make mine a bagel, please.
I've seen some things here in the US called "crumpets", and they're sort of like what we call English muffins. but thinner and bubblier. Let's all go to England and get the straight skinny.
For now, neither Big Bird nor Snuffleupagus appears to have radically slimmed down, though Cookie Monster looks trimmer when singing alongside Wyclef Jean. - C is no longer for cookie
...One of the corporate sponsors of the campaign, ironically, is McDonald's, whose menu is not the pinnacle of healthfulness. But it's no more ironic than a bid for activity that occurs on that most passive of media: TV.
aah, so the Americans call crumpets English Muffins. Sorry, I thought when they said 'English muffins' they meant English muffins.
My bad (I think, or am just apologising cos I'm English? Sorry)
When Americans hear English men refering to "crumpets" we think they're talking about loose women.
And here they were hungry for biscuits all the time.
BlueHorse... now u done gone and confused me all over again!
I like my strumpets well buttered.
The crumpet should not be confused with the sweeter English muffin.
People, people - First you click da link and den read da Wooooorrds! Yah! Den find da key to da liquor cabinet! Ahhhhh . . . sweet bourbon! *glug* *glug* *glug* . . . *urpp!* . . AAhhh*glug* *glug* *glug* . . .
spokespersonspokesmonster for low carb diets? Sheesh!