March 14, 2005

• Dear Malawi, Your president appears to be having some sort of psychotic episode. Out of interest, in addition to feeling the invisible rats crawling over his body, has he ever complained of a strong metallic taste on his tongue? Buzzing noises? How about seeing spiders appear and disappear in his peripheral vision? You, er... you need any help with him? Or have you got it covered? Just, you know- well, call if you need anything. Like if he starts accusing everybody around him of being robots or witches or something. A hint: if he starts obsessively tapping his teeth and muttering about people needing to be "purified", invisible rats will shortly be the least of your problems. Anyhow, good luck with everything. Keep your spirts up (as it were). Lots of love, f
• The details of the article read like a Shakespearian play. Intrigue, greed, psychosis... Gotta love the ruling class!
• Me buddy's father built raod to nowhere in Malawi. They got nice furniture/craftsmen there. Whats this about ghoste's? Mabye someone whodoed vodoo boo! I hate it when that happens. HAaaa [sinister laugh.] It shall now be the peoples mansion! For too long Chiefys keep moneies from the peoples ghoestess mad! no Rich man no live in no 'ighouse. [lighting ]
• Best guess: President has DTs, a malady in which invisible insects and/or other disagreeable fauna are alleged to crawl over the afflicted one's skin. As if these pests had nothing better to do. Suspect the footsteps, though, may be ghosts. Of failed legislation.
• While this man certainly sounds unhinged, I'm finding it hard to be amused when there are plenty of influential people within our own government who are basing their decisions on an imminent rapture. At least his form of madness isn't accepted as ideology. (I hope.)
• I hear you, maryh. The first thing I thought of when I read this article was 'How close the U.S. is to this nonsense.' In particular, here's the fifth paragraph, slightly revised, which I'd not be shocked to read in the newspaper none too far in the future: "The Rev. Jesse Helms, the presidential aide on Christian affairs, told reporters ghosts would not be allowed to harm President Bush. He added: "No strategy designed from the pits of hell will prosper against the President because we have asked for divine intervention to cast the blood of Jesus against any evil plots against the President."
• Um, this post has absolutely zero to due with the US or its government, and in fact the article deals in its entireity with an African country. Can every single thread not turn to, "yes interesting article about zebra mating habits, that really reminds me of how dumb Bush is and the US is the most evil country in the history of the world..." Please?
• And why not? Surely you are not suggesting that Americans unironically make fun of other countries and their lunatic heads of state? (Of course you non-Americans do enjoy the luxury of being free of this particular kind of ironic shackles.)
• DrJimmy,sorry, but I can't goof on those 'crazy African dictators' for thier silly superstitions when you've got the same kind of nonsense going on in your backyard. And why does "Bush Dumb= US evil"? That's your equation, not mine. I don't think the current administration defines what the USA is, or what it will be. Hugs now?
• I guess you'd like me to check in with you every time I might want to observe what a lunkhead Bush is, drjimmy. Given that my birth certificate is from Missouri, I have as much right to comment on these issues in the way I find appropriate as you do. Then again, I think we all have the right to do so, no matter where we were born or what negative or positive things we might have to say about utter nonsense or important matters. If I had knowledge of superstitious silliness displayed by other world leaders, I'd have brought it up here, too: when purportedly sane people in charge of entire nations start hollering about jesus, ghosts and ufos, I think it should be exposed.
• Brought up in an even more condescending way on the blue.
• What drjimmy said. It's getting tired.
• The USA is my country: I missed it terribly when I was overseas. I support our troops. I have many friends in the military--some at war. Bush is an utter and complete greed-driven asshole. That is all. Oh, and BOO! Bingu
• Number of posts to Republicans = Bad: Metafilter: 6 Number of posts to Republicans = Bad: Monkeyfilter: 6 I'm with drjimmy. You want to rag on Bush in every thread, spend the $5 and go to The Blue. (Hmmm, I just noticed that. Metafilter = The Blue. How funny) :: On Topic Mr Mutharika ... threw Malawi's parliament out of the New State House and claimed it for his personal use ... Now clergy from the Roman Catholic, Lutheran, Calvary and Faith Of God churches have all been asked to offer prayers for the building. Perhaps they have been doing just that all along.
• And that's kept the phantom rats away how?
• My guess is a little too much okey-doke.
• I would second/third/whatever drjimmy's point; I am sorry to say that I don't know anything about Malawi, but there is corruption and evil in politics in Africa that far outweighs anything the Bush government may or may not have done. Even in countries without death squads and civil war, the disparity between rich and poor is insane, and you can put most heads of governments up there as the richest of the rich. This very house is a symbol of that - according to the article, the second president (after the first ruled as an autocrat for 30 years) refused to live there because of it. Making this, yet again, about American politics is just being arrogant, insular and self-obsessed, like saying that African issues and politics aren't important enough to be discussed on their own grounds. Fine to make the point that decisions made on faith or belief that some consider irrational are by no means strangers to the Western world, but leave it at that. There is also a lot more to this story - the house had been used as the main Parliament building, but the President forced them out.

  "Last May, when Mr Mutharika, 71, came to power, he threw Malawi's parliament out of the New State House and claimed it for his personal use, ignoring protests that he was reneging on election promises to cut government spending. Parliament has not been able to meet since September because of the lack of an appropriate venue, and is to reconvene in March in rented offices. Parliamentary committees have had to conduct their business in motels and at one point MPs have considered using a sports stadium for their debates."

  The president claims it wasn't a very good Parliament building (which it might not have been, having been built as a residence originally), but it's not like they had another venue.
• And that's kept the phantom rats away how? posted by maryh at 06:03AM UTC on March 14, 2005 I am implying that the religious leaders/organizations have in fact been praying for phantom rats and ghosts to haunt President Bingu Wa Mutharika and drive him out.
• Man lost his way, no turning back, he's coming under too much flak, this mansion is a huge drawback -- he's under phantom rat attack.
• ())) Bees!) Poor President Bingu! Phantom vermin surround him! Those ghostly tormentors harass him and hound him! We pray that his troubles will grow ever littler. Oh yeah - that reminds me: Bush = Hitler.
• HA! rolf mayo

• jb: Making this, yet again, about American politics is just being arrogant, insular and self-obsessed, like saying that African issues and politics aren't important enough to be discussed on their own grounds.

  But isn't that true? There has been a genocide going on in Darfur for ages now, and we talk about it how often? We have already decided that Africa isn't important, except to LOL every once in a while at the silly darkies. They don't even have any natural resources left to loot. Besides, it is good to see the apologists out in full force. When every discussion becomes a painful reminder of how awful the present day USA is, then we will have talked about it too much.
• Fuck you once for the term "apologists", which is baseless and immature; fuck you twice for suggesting we don't care about Darfur, when you know full well that we've discussed it long and often; and fuck you thrice for that "silly darkies" comment. Apologies for the intemperate language, but jesus - flinging accusations of racism simply because people are tired of every other country in the world being reduced to the level of "metaphor for Bush's America"... not only is it deeply insulting, but it's completely the wrong way round.
• Plus, some of us here are silly darkies.
• Who are these apologists, exactly?
• Mutharika's house isn't haunted, you see: It's just a big soundstage for Episode III. The frightened dictator relocates to Venice While Lucas is filming The Phantom Rat Menace.
• I'm sorry - I'm an apologist. It won't happen again. Sorry.
• I don't read the comparison as a reduction of the situation in Malawi to a "metaphor for Bush's America". Fakte, I read it as a direct challenge to any American commentors here to be aware that they are faring no better than Malawians. Perhaps we here in MoFi are sufficiently aware of this, but we here in the USA aren't. We here in the USA are, like, "Dar... what?" Yes, not everyone here is a goddamn American. They are encouraged to ignore us. We Americans just can't seem to get over ourselves; it is our worst fault and likely our imminent undoing.
• They are encouraged to ignore us Why are you referring to flash (and I) in the third person, fu?
• Well then, I withdraw my fucks you, but would politely request a little sympathy with those who find repetitive Bush chatter more than a tad boring. And less of the "apologists"...
• The quidnunc kid will note that in an unordered group of three, consisting of flashboy, the quidnunc kid, and fuyugare, the quidnunc kid is indeed the third person, just as much as are flashboy and fuyugare.
• quidnunc so notes. quidnunc talk like hulk now.
• I am fed up with all this excruciating discussion of wacky African leaders! Virtually every thread is hijacked by some hater who wants to bash this continent! Can't we all just agree that hallucinating despots are regular guys?
• Sorry about the bit about "apologists". I was misremembering the political colours of some participants here. (Luckily google has a better memory than I.) Anyway, now that we have established that this strand of the thread is teh ennui, let's move on.
• Watching this thread has been like watching those videos of an explosion in slow-motion, then the explosion regresses till you see the bomb again. Or something.
• flashboy notes that we shall mostly stick to insane heads of state from the former Soviet republics from now on.
• quidnunc desires only chocolate
• white chocolate, milk chocolate, or silly darky chocolate?
• quidnunc is non-prejudiced in such matters
• Well then, I withdraw my fucks you, but would politely request a little sympathy with those who find repetitive Bush chatter more than a tad boring. And less of the "apologists"... Seconded. Also, I'd like some non-racist chocolate.
• Oh - you mean the kind that BUSH never eats?!?!?! /da capo
• *kicks quidnunc in the Bush*
• I love the recent edit comment on the Bingu wa Mutharika Wikipedia article.
• This thread is an emotional rollercoaster.
• Monkeyfilter: I withdraw my fucks you.
• What if there really are evil spirits?
• Ah, so now we're supposed to dictate the content of our responses according to how a few people feel we should stop 'picking on' the U.S.? Yeah, that's going to happen. I made my comment and I stand by it and the reasoning behind it. Superstitious people beg to be mocked, and noting that there is more than one world leader who has the IQ of a broken pencil should be done, not swept under the rug and politely ignored because someone might get offended when you notice a painful inadequacy. p.s. your emperor is naked.
• It's not about picking on the US. And no one's asking you to back down or consult them first. It's just that sometimes it gets a little one-note around here, which is boring, and many of our non-US monkeys (of which I know you are one) get tired of hearing it, and they're requesting that maybe we stay on topic and not politicize every thread. They're not making demands. They're just asking for a little consideration. This post had absolutely nothing, nothing to do with the United States or its current government. If there was some political connection to the US, or if this was a remotely political thread, then some US-centered remark might make sense. But there's no such connection here. Surely we can find new and interesting ways to mock people? If nothing else, it's just good mental exercise. For God's sake, the man thinks that the ghosts of dead rodents are haunting his mansion. There have to be at least a a dozen ways to have fun at his expense that don't follow the same familiar just-like-Bush path that we've trod a thousand times, and any one of them would be funnier. But again, it's just a request.
• All right, that's it, everyone outside we're going to settle this like men. Last man standing wins. My favorite world leader is the guy that runs Guanno, or something. That guy is Pimp' man. They got so much money he pays people to exercise him! They put him on a bloody bike n' he does the tour round the track, "all hail the king of guanno" or something of the like. Oh Christ that's funny. It's named after Seagull Guanno, the island that is. Forget this Turkmenbashi, person, guy, the guanno kings much more ineresting, he even has a hungrey ghost of Rasputin.
• I hear your request, but feel it misplaced. We comment on what we know: I was born in the U.S. and lived there for over forty years. Hearing of a superstitious world leader made me think of one other superstitious world leader I was already familiar with. Is such a connection farfetched or hysterical? I think not. If I were a German, I might recall a superstitious German leader (had there been any in living memory). Had I been Japanese, had I been Venezuelan, had I been Australian... you get the idea. As for not politicizing threads, I wonder how one can comment on the leader of a nation without mentioning politics. If it were a post about fondue pots, would you think it germane to mention cheese or chocolate? Some things are inextricably associated with certain topics: to ignore them is beyond foolish. National leader = politics, sombreros = hats, ducks = necrophilia. Had maryh and I made no reference to the politics we are familiar with and only commented on ghost rats, we'd have ignored one half of the story. I suppose we'd have fewer cranky people in here, but that would be dishonest representation of my interest and reflection upon learning that the leader of a nation in the world in which we live is a superstitious nutjob.
• Making this, yet again, about American politics is just being arrogant, insular and self-obsessed, like saying that African issues and politics aren't important enough to be discussed on their own grounds. You're right jb, my apology for diverting attention away from the posted subject. We comment on what we know. Yes, true, and we comment on what is to the forefront of our mind. I believe many people are concerned about where the US is going at this time. I think many of us see some connection between an African leader who has extreme superstitions concerning death, and Bush, who's obsessively Xtian superstitions are being shoved down the throats of everyone in the US, and being used to justify the killing of anyone on his sh ... hit list. Given the tone of Wolof's post, I didn't really think he was inviting intelligent discussion on African politics. Just my HO. Others obviously took it differently.
• quidnunc thought everything was basically fine
• Given the tone of Wolof's post, I didn't really think he was inviting intelligent discussion on African politics. It's true. I was inviting intelligent discussion of ghostly rodents, but you fuckers wouldn't take the bait.
• Well, since I started this mess, I guess I should say something. I saw this posted on MeFi while I was doing a search on Eritrea, a country where the US may or may not have a strategic military base. It's hard to tell, because while the LA Times reported back in 2003 we did, there've been a couple of jokey new-stories since that made it sound like the hapless Eritreans were begging for a little Haliburton action....So anyways, I read this post as another 'silly African' story. Since so much of what I was finding on the web fell either into the War-torn or Wacky category, I did some inappropriate lashing out. My bad. I still think there's a lot of crazy, superstitious loons in the administration. But I won't run my yap off in an innocent post again anytime soon.
• But I won't run my yap off in an innocent post again anytime soon. Run your yap off here any tme you want to, maryh. It's all cool.
• Hey whats this about darkies? Isn't racism just something the losers use to complain about their situation? Jews, Polocks, Wops, they didn't bitch about racism, or at least too much. Whats the big deal? And another thing I knew this guy that had family in South Africa, then there was this riot right, then the "south Africans" or some call savages started killing people, white, black Asian, they wern't racist about it. So whats worse, being a racist or being a savge and mabye a killer. that's all thats in the crackpot.
• Charming.
• I like the way it comes right after I say "it's all cool".
• that's all thats in the crackpot Ah, I see the problem. I think you may need to move 'Zig' for great justice.