January 29, 2004

• As the typical NZ woman, I would kick ass if I had a bunch of friends over who couldn't put their diet on hold to eat something I'd spent hours making. I admit I considered the Atkins Diet, but since I'm only unfit, not overweight, it would have been pointless and I'd never be able to enjoy a full meal without worrying about how much protein/carbohydrate/sugar was in it. Screw that.
• I'm a big believer in cutting out a lot of processed food (white flour, white rice, white bread, sugar, potatoes) in general. I feel better when I do it, and I lose weight. HOWEVER, we're talking about living your life and if you're going out to a nice restaurant or a dinner party it's important to lighten up. The trick is moderation. Sample a few things that may not be on your diet and rave about the cooking, but don't stuff your face. It's not that difficult. I think getting snippy about someone who doesn't want wine or bread at the table is a little over top on the other end, but I agree that it's rude to bitch about the food when you go to a party. I actually don't understand why you'd want to be in public with an attitude like that. It's like they're using their diet as a badge of pride. Annoying.
• Everywhere I've eaten in France, you pretty much get bread with the meal, and a table win is the normal drink. Complaining about getting bread in France is like going to a sushi place an telling them you can't have rice.
• Sushi - rice = sashimi ;)
• I should add that if you go to France and snub their bread you're CRAZY.
• "I have very good friends that I love who are well-educated people, but when I go with them in a restaurant in Paris, I'm ashamed every time," she said. "They're polite, they say please, but they never want a meal the way it's served, and they call the server over ten times to ask things that French people would never dare ask--Dressing on the side! No ice cubes! No sauce! No butter." This is text-book igly.
• Er, that should read "igry".
• Quite frankly, her friends need a good solid dose of cock-punch. sorry.. I just had to say it.. I've been wanting to for so very, very long...
• I second the cock-puch suggestion. People need to STFU about their goddamn diets already.
• I igree with Wolof -- all very igly indeed.
• The worst horror story I have from my friends and aquaintances, incidentally, concerned not a slimming woman or someone with bizarre eating preferences, but a bloke I know who, on going to meet his girlfriend's parents for the first time, managed to rather blot his copybook. Said friend was something of an amatuer bodybuilder for whom the word tact was an unexplored part of a dictionary; he started providing detailed analysis of the fat content and healthfulness of the meal. At some length. And it wasn't a favourable commentary. Oddly enough, they didn't last.
• To me it sounds like her friends are rude, regardless of their diets. But Laura is an ass. By her reasoning when I'm hanging out with some of my friends who happen to do drugs, I should just cut loose and enjoy the high. Bullsh*t. And since when is being obese NOT a health issue?
• By her reasoning when I'm hanging out with some of my friends who happen to do drugs, I should just cut loose and enjoy the high. And who would have thought that when they invited you around for a drug party there would be actual drugs there?
• Well, even at a drug party, one may say "No, thank you," and smile enigmatically, perhaps giving the impression that one already has plenty of drugs in one's system, and to imbibe further would be just piling on, bogarting a buzz that some straight newcomer could have copped.
• That's the joy of drugs though. You can never get to buzzed. Well alright, clearly you can in the literal sense passing out and whatnot, but you always miss the jay or brew that got away.
• I admit it, I'm an uppity freak about both drugs and the American diet. But I'm an individual and I should be able to decline graciously without feeling pressured to consume what I prefer not to. It seems to me that the author isn't offended JUST by her guests rudeness of speaking openly about their diets, but also by the idea that they would not wolf down the meal she prepared. She can't have it both ways.
• Well, the dilemma is actually simple. The guests should try to inform oneself about what's going to be offered and try to accept whatever is offered to eat or decline politely for very good ethical, religious or health reasons. And the hosts should also try to know beforehand the preferences of the guests and make the correct preparations. Anyway, it's just a dinner. People won't get mad forever if things don't come up as expected.
• why does this thread make me think of the german cannibal? oh, never mind.
• Two. Words. TACKY BITCHES More. Words. And controlling obesity has little or nothing to do with it. She didn't serve Kraft Mac n' Cheese and a side of McDonald's McDownerBurgersTM with a helping of meth, she had wonderful, healthy, freshly-prepared food lovingly made and offered in a genuine gesture of friendship and hospitality. Wouldida killed them to tell her it all looked wonderful, take a tiny bit of everything and a forkful to taste it, then sit there with their traps SHUT about their damn diets, occasionally taking itty-bitty sips of water? I can see the woman being frustrated as well as hurt that she would offer this in a gesture of goodwill and have it be rejected in the rudest possible way. Can you say self-righteous and condescending, boys and girls? Oh no, them American wimmens got tell everyone in public how they diet, then go home and eat a quart of Ben and Jerry's in one sitting. Eat. Puke. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. Oh yea and I'm a chubby 50 year old broad who does NOT eat chocolate anymore and I'm trying to kick a sweet crab/major cookie habit as well as a coffee Jones and I decided I'm pretty well off meats if I could just get my hubby The Cook to put aside a serving of food for me before adding meat to his portion and yadda yadda yadda and I gotta get my lard butt in shape for endurance season so I don't be DYING on a 50 mile ride and having my horse sag in the middle and it really is all about memememememememememe and like y'all give a rat's roasted ass served au jus and would like to listen to this interminably and monotonously over YOUR dinner. Just Plain. Selfish. Oh, and cooks RULE. signed, Lubs to eat good food; hates to cook.
• Right after I posted my rant I tabbed over in Firebird to my Hotmail email and found this from: http://www.ruminate.com Copy. Paste Ruminations for January 30, 2004 -=++=- For six months I've been on this Atkins meat-based diet,and although I'm losing weight, it's beginning to get difficult to stick to the diet. Before too long, I'll have to move on to another town to find more Atkinses. (Brad Simanek) Cracked me up.
• IgnorantSlut: If you don't want to eat, don't accept dinner invites. The woman isn't being an ass, her friends are being lousy guests. And note the French behaviour she lauds is not to mindlessly consume, but to sample politely and not make a fuss. You know, manners and stuff. I have wholesale allergies to most seafood. I make sure people know about this. I don't turn up to dinner when someone invites me and spend the evening bitching about the fish they cooked.
• rodgerd - I think you may be barking up the wrong tree here. I see a flaw in Laura's logic (lemming logic) and I think she's over-reacting by stating that dieting as a behavior is rude. Her guests were thoughtless and rude, absolutely (as I stated above). For what it's worth I happen to eat a reduced carb 'diet'. It's the way I've eaten for almost two years now and I'll continue to eat this way because it helps me to stay healthy and keep that extra 50 pounds off. I eat a greater variety of foods including meat, vegetables, whole grains, some fruit, etc. than I did when I wasn't eating this way. I routinely pass up bread, rice and a host of foods I just don't care for. If I ever make it to France I imagine that I might break some bread while there. But maybe not. I'm originally from Chicago and whenever I know I'm going home I salivate about getting good pizza. Then when I'm there it just doesn't seem like a big deal to pass on it. I know what it would do to my body and it rarely seems worth it. Instead I go out to a really great restaurant and have a feast of lower carb foods. Mmmmm. Cafe Ba Ba Reeba. [Mental note, make reservation for next visit]. In the past almost two years I've been to just one dinner (Company holiday party 2002) where I couldn't eat anything. I knew that going in, but did not have the choice to skip it for company political reasons. I ate a small meal before hand and sat and enjoyed the great conversation while having some diet soda. And this past year? I offered to help plan a menu so that others like myself would have some options.
• Well, there are some bad behaviors associated with picking a diet. Sometime after we moved from California to New Jersey, my daughter invited a Cali friend to come visit. When the friend arrived, she announced that she had become a vegan just before making the trip (or maybe on the plane?) and was quite comfortable in assuming that I would be really anxious to cook separate meals for her during the couple of weeks she was staying. I, of course, in my most sensitive and caring manner, explained to her that not only was I not going to even try to figure out what in the hell vegans eat and check every product I bought to make sure it only included green things and air, but that cooking, for me, is like gift giving, and she would be really rude to refuse my gifts - especially as a captive recipient. She managed to be quite well fed while she was there. Then, another buddy took up my invitation to stay with us while going to college in NJ (free room and board.) When he arrived, he announced that he'd become a vegetarian just before ...etc., etc. Later on, yet others of my daughter's friends, having heard me rant about those and other similar experiences, gave me a bumper sticker which said "I eat vegans." It's true, you know. MMMMMM, leg of lamb! On preview, what a lot of you said.
• path: I can understand where you are coming from. But I think there is a fundamental difference between 'lifestyle' diets and those who eat a certain way for health reasons, whether those reasons are disease, allergen/intolerance or obesity related. Which is not to say that I don't respect 'lifestyle' diets. I used to make Swedish wine every holiday season. I didn't foist my gift upon those I knew to be recovering alcoholics. Likewise, as a meat-eater I don't force my vegetarian friends into starve vs. eat meat decisions. I have friends I stay with back home who are mostly low-fat and it was difficult for me to address the issue of my food choices with them because I didn't want to offend them or rebuff their generosity. They are great friends, but I still felt odd about it. I eventually brought it up about a month before my first visit after going low-carb. I explained that I had changed the way I eat and what was different from the last time I visited. I offered to go shopping and do a lot of cooking while I was there. It turned out great. I was able to cook wonderful healthy meals with food they loved and I could eat.
• Extremelysmartslut - I agree, 100 percent. It's just that not everyone who comes to visit is that grown up.