March 09, 2005

• Poor guy probably suffocated under those six cashmere blankets that they want returned.
• I read that wrong the first time and thought that they did not know he was dead until the son opened the Old dude's mouth.
• "A religious group in Osaka said one of our prayers would be realized in a major way in the third month of the Year of the Cock (March, 2005), so we told the police about (the body)," the son said. Something tells me they weren't doing it for the yen.
• LokiSpeak I too misinterpreted that final sentence and was equally confounded! this is one strange story...
• Apologies for my confounded sentence structure!
• No need to apologize. Just don't ever let me catch you hanging around these parts again.
• Ha, the year of the cock, The rooster woke him.
• The unlived life is not worth examining.
• "He sure smells funny, doesn't he?" "Yeah." "He sure sleeps a lot, doesn't he?" "I don't think he's asleep. I think he's dead." "Really?" "Oops. Never mind."
• "Mommy I shook grandpa's hands and they crumbled to dust. Is he ok?" "Yes dear, he just needs some more lotion"
• "What's it like caring for your 107 year old Grampa?" "It's no trouble at all. No. Trouble. At. All..... So, did you bring some more gifts?"
• Punk'd!
• I recommend Japan file a restraining order on Ashton Kutcher immediately.
• You know what? It's a Japanese fellow who has(or at least had, haven't read guiness in a while) the world record for lifespan. He attributed his longjevity to "spirits", a glass a day. I wonder now if he was just a blooming lawn ornament.
• Bloody 'ell I just read the bloomin' article now. And I thought my feet smelled. Its not possible to have a maggot bag, in one piece for that long. Every rat from every district from every cat-fighting, back alley from 300Ks would 'ave been at the at the steak tar-tar buffet which was his bloody corpse. They must 'ave 'ad the bloody air' conditioning cranked. Mabye they bloody freeze dried 'im. It would take a lot of bloody liquid nitrogen. God' I can smell the stence from 'ere. So thats why them Japanese are vegatarians. Me mudder gets mad when I leave the milk out for five minutes, god 'elp me if it was a bloody corpse. Yeah that'll be the bloody day, "well what about you sis', you think we should just leave 'im there?" Sis "well his bowels are empty now, he should be good for a couple weeks" A couple weeks?, We should try to milk this thing, them yanks think we'z long lived n' that" "he smells pretty bad already." "Yeah, but I got febreez! He'll be fine." "they'll be 'ere with our free gifts soon, prop im' up!"
• this is one strange story ... about one strange family one strange son two strange daughters all in their seventies one strange father makes it to 107 only -- oops! -- for the last ten years father's grown stranger being dead and lying there on his strange bed in a ground floor bedroom at the front of one strange Japanese house where strangely clean kimonos freshly laundered were placed on the strange corpse no one wanted to think about or admit was there meanwhile the no less strange town in the last six strange years gave six cashmere blankets and other goodies they now think they want back and they seem about to raise a stink
• The unlived life is not worth examining. i feel unusual wins! heh.
• Let me tell a little story bout a man named Dead Lived so long, they poked inside his head Son said Shit! I thought Daddy was alive! So Son walked up the hill and he told his Auntie Live. Dead, he is. Mayor fooled, village shocked. [To the tune of The Beverly Hillbillies sitcom.]