February 07, 2005
Double Package Post: Maria McKee & Alcohol Enema
Two Monkey posts for the price of one.
There is a huge archive of rare and (many) live videos of former Lone Justice singer Maria McKee. I had a crush on her in high school when I saw the cover of the first Lone Justice album. *** The following goes in the don't try this at home department.
ANGLETON - Investigators say a Lake Jackson woman caused her husband's death by giving him a sherry enema, causing his blood alcohol level to surge to 0.47 percent - almost six times the legal intoxication limit. Tammy Jean Warner, 42, was indicted on a charge of negligent homicide. She is also charged with burning the will of her late husband, Michael Warner, a month before his death in May.
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May we infer anything from your connection of your high school crush and the booze enema Sullivan?
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Hey, don't knock and high school crush and booze anemas.
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Who's knocking? Sounds like a well-spent youth to me.
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I meant "Hey, don't knock my high school crush and booze anemas"
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Wow -- thanks for reminding about McKee -- I haven't heard any of her music in years...but I'll admit that I'm baffled at the "two-fer" post.
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Monkeyfilter: high school crushes and booze enemas
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Once again, I am reminded that all of us ought to be more circumspect about what we put up our butts.
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It's a good rule of thumb. Speaking of thumbs, they fit pretty well up your butt.
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The sheer logistics of this frighten me. How do you fit 3 liters of liquid up your butt? That seems like a lot. Also, wouldn't the sherry burn? Also also, how does one keep it in? ... Maybe I don't want to know?
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meredithea: with a butt plug, perhaps?
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This sherry tastes like shit.
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MonkeyFilter: All of us ought to be more circumspect about what we put up our butts. *covers eyes and reinserts fingers in ears La la la la lala
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s/ear/anu/
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You mean this thread isn't about putting things up Maria McKee's butt? I am so officially bummed....
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Nomen Nescio: I figured as much, butt-plug wise. I just wasn't sure about the ... hmmm... gripping power necessary to hold back 3 liters of sherry. I would think that would want to come out really badly.
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gripping power I believe the medical term is "clenchitatory response."
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Used in a sentence: "Case Number 4: a man with an ungodly amount of sherry up his butt was able to hold it in for awhile due to his having put other ungodly amounts of stuff up his butt and, by degrees, had increased his clenchitatory response to similarly ungodly levels, to the point that the ER proctologist lost a pen and two little maglights to breakage during the initial examination."
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As an aside, I SO hope the attending nurse's name was Sherry.
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We've all heard of the breathalizer, but I think this calls for new technology... Ladies and gentelmen, I give you the "flatulizer"!
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And cops pulling you over and sniffing your breath?
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Now when Uncle Roy lights his farts you can *really* get a show. On a side note, I'm told that Motley Crue drummer Tommy Lee has a relevant anecdote involving groupies, champagne and a chandelier? Anyone? okay which one of you monkeys is Tommy Lee?
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but I'll admit that I'm baffled at the "two-fer" post. This is not the first time I have done a double package post. See here and here.
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Fes, if the nurse's name was Sherry, that would prove that the universe has a purpose, and that it smiles upon us. Also, clenchitatory response? Hee hee hee :)
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butts are funny.
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you butthead.
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Maria McKee was supposed to be a big old superstar. Dang. I forgot about her. She sang the hell out of something, sometime, somewhere. I believe she did a duet with Dwight Yoakam on his first or second album.
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Yep, she can sure sing. I liked her work with Robbie Robertson.