Meet Pontifex vonHummer, musician, lobster headgear aficionado, and host of The vonHummer Hour. "Describing the vonHummer Hour is like performing a strip tease for a roomful of blind eunuchs: it's not a total waste of time, but it might as well be." You can listen to the theme song, the songs of the month, or catch clips of the show on the downloads page. Live in or near Portland, OR? Watch the show. Better yet, come see vonHummer live on February 5th.

One weekend, I stumbled onto this local Portland cable access show called The vonHummer Hour, and I was instantly transixed by the indecipherable antics taking place before my eyes. A man, wearing four lobsters on his head and sunglasses with eyes glued to them was conversing with a purple haired woman, and they were speaking in a melange of various languages and made up words. The dialogue was subtitled so that viewers could understand (as much as possible, anyway) what was going on. There are always several music videos interspersed throughout the episodes. The first time I watched, vonHummer was singing an off-kilter song about "the kid not being his". The strange thing is that all the songs are in English, but the dialogue is always in vonHummer-speak. Occasionally, a painting of Sulu (yes, that Sulu) appears on the screen and starts talking about various things, sometimes related to the show, sometimes not. In the first episode I saw, I believe Sulu was giving bad advice regarding someone's love life. I think vonHummer is supposed to be an alien, but I haven't seen any of the earlier shows, so I don't know that for sure. It would certainly explain his getup, but I don't need that to validate the weirdness. I like it anyway, and I hope some of you will like it too.