December 28, 2004

• Do you want to see a bad post and resulting bad thread? Go no further back than this.
• Things that people have said in the past (paraphrased): a) The post hasn't got enough words. b) The post has too many words. c) The main link has no supporting links. d) There are too many links. e) It belongs on fark. f) It's too depressing. g) It's posted by someone I don't like. h) It's been on Metafilter. i) It's more than x years old. I should start a compendium. A good/bad post is almost entirely subjective.
• Then, of course, there was that neat trick of fooling us all (well, I was flummoxed, so everyone else must have been, too) into thinking that St. Tracicle had grown tired of our sinful ways.
• sarc
• On preview - don't worry about it - if you need to know something, then ask - if you see something that interests or amuses you, just tell us. I've had posts with no comments made, but I survived. A quick search is all you need, in my opinion. Double post are bad. The odd kitten now and again won't hurt either. Get stuck in. Have a Morrisey-shaped banana on me.
• Well, there's this (Although it's not "offensive" anymore. Just AOL bashing (in the audio) with pics of a stuffed hamster, I think. I can't tell as it still shakes the crap out of your browser window) And I guess this would be a bad post: I totally agree with these adorable girls!!!! They're soooo right in every way! And, of course, the worst offender of all is: This pile of shit thread. I don't know what kind of jackass would post something like that. People are just stupid, I guess.
• Anything that pisses off fuyugare and/or nostrildamus - although I realize that doesn't help define the actual criteria.
• 'Baser - you just haven't met the right kitten yet...
• I'd forgotten about that one, Skrik. It could have been funny if he hadn't picked the day I wanted to die because I was feeling so crap. I've been trying to think about what I consider a bad post - bearing in mind that my opinion here is no more or less valid than any other monkey - and the ones I like make me laugh or think (or both), don't have screwy HTML, have an attention-getting title, and generally start off an informative and friendly (!) discussion/debate. I'm not really picky.
• Newsfilter is generally discouraged and could well get you a snark or two, but then there are exceptions to that as well. Thank Christ the US election is over.
• What election? Not the Prom Queen?!!
• I was searching for some good pointers, and also hoping that some bad posts would be linked. My fellow monkeys came through on both of those counts. However, I was also hoping that some creative Monkeys would make-up some intentionally bad, over-the-top, stupid posts and put them in this thread.
• It's a trap!
• Here's a hint. If your post involves an internet site that ten million blogs linked to in 2002 (blackpeopleloveus or realultimatepower), it sucks. Please don't stop at searching here. If you look it up and it looks like EVERYWHERE BUT HERE has run a link before, odds are we've seen it. I don't think monkeyfilter is anyone's sole internet destination.
• a href=monkeyfighter.com"This is so kewl.>/a oh sorry, I meant click here ok this is it DAMN !!! @#!#@&&&!!!! seriously
• Since you asked... Tracicle's blog is probably a better place to post these sorts of questions. BUT DON'T EVEN BOTHER APOLOGIZING, BECAUSE IT'S TOO LATE, NOW!! /picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue
• -
• one last post Curious George: I have a enflamed bump on my right nut sack. Everytime I squeeze my balls, a viscous, blue-cheese smelling syrup slowly leaks from a quarter inch hole located at the bottom of the testicular region. I was just wondering if any monkeys had this experience previously. I've found that the fluid goes great with buffalo wings, and was wondering what other foods it would add flavor to!
• BITCH SHUT THE FUCK UP AND GO MAKE ME A SANDWICH verry verry bad
• Curious George: Does anyone know of a really good rectal thermometer? I have tried all of the name brands, but I find that they either snap off or get pulled up all the way. I absolutely need to know what is going on in there, and it would be a bonus if it was mint-flavored.
• Curious George: Do these pants/dress/etc., make my ass look fat? The correct answer is: no, your ass makes your ass look fat. Those pants/dress/etc., just accentuate/enhance/etc. the effect.
• The quickest and easiest ways to become a monkeyfilter legend: Post a picture of your ex boyfriend having a wank. Or, failing that, post an odd, almost incomprehensible essay about science and religion, followed immediately by another fairly incomprehesible post consisting of random quotes and sweeping insults. But no links. Anywhere. But, really, if you want to win our hearts and minds, and live on forever in our jokes and taglines, you'll have to come up with something new and special and imaginative and generally insane. Just linking to your weblog while asking rambling questions which make little sense won't work - we'll all have forgotten that within a couple of days.
• Curious George: Where is my sock? bernockle, I think you are fine, please don't be discouraged posting again. Maybe we can ignore realultimatepower & you can have another go? Folks here seem to like mid-level intellectual arty stuff, fun, food, ky00t animals, booze & humor. Heavy stuff or deep nerdy stuff seems to go by the wayside. Steamy stuff sometimes gets a bite, but not too much or Monkeys start getting excited. People posting about themselves or being toolish seems to be unpopular. Heavy emotionalism also seems to be ignored. That's just my take. btw very little pisses me off on the site & I don't like to think that I have any influence here other than being a poster.. I know I have a loud personality.. so, sorry
• Have you forgotten dng? Have you?...
• Curious, George: why does everyone hate me? Do I smell?
• /sniffs
• Any post that you feel is valuable enough to share with the group is okay by me. Don't worry about the other 2,613. Screw them. Do I smell? Try an Ass-tringent
• The worst Monkeyfilter post in my opinion is: Metafilter is down! And a bit crankier: "I have a problem but i'm too lazy to look it up on google so i'll ask it here" type of posts tend to stick in my crawl, but I can just ignore them, so they aren't too bad.
• In your crawl? Craw, you mean.
• Not the Craw, the Craw!
• I wish he should of used gud grammer & speling like what I does.
• three words: Wacky. Ebay. Auction.
• We could do without garbage like this.
• Hey Rocket, I took his warning seriously and didn't click the link, just the comments. Even those were mentally gag producing. But I have this magic mouse that made it all go away. My personal opinion is that type of post lowers the tone of the joint, but, hey, thems that want to read it can go right ahead. I'm easy to live with.
• A lot of these "guidelines" seem like people are speaking on behalf of the otherfilter, instead of here. It really doesn't seem that too much is insisted upon here for the a post to be worthy. Make a complete sentence, capitalize the first word, and don't screw up the link. Meet those three things, and you've probably made a decent post, I think. There's no bar to pass as far as "quality of the link" goes. The diversity of mofi ensures that there'll be some links I don't find interesting. So I don't click on those ones, and I stay out of the thread, leaving it for the monkeys who do dig it. It seems to me that most other monkeys behave the same.
• Worst. Post. Ever. Wait. Was I not using my inner voice?
• Sweet. That is what I was looking for. Now I know just to do the opposite of what I would do and I will be fine.
• BlueHorse: I don't buy that argument. I know plenty of disgusting shit exists on the internet, and I know how to avoid it, for the most part. As a quasi-self-policing community, we all have a say in what's appropriate on Monkeyfilter. I don't want to have to navigate around porn links (and worse) here, and labelling them NSFW doesn't make it OK. People who want to see that crap already know where to go to get it. Sometimes I browse Monkeyfilter at home, with my kids buzzing around, and my daughter has seen the front-page logo and asked what I was doing, and I tell her that it's just a site of (mostly) interesting links, and discussions, and that it's (mostly) adults, and she wouldn't be interested (all of which is true). But what if she decides to check it out for herself, because she knows Dad likes it, and sees something like Nostril's post? I know I can't shield her from everything, but if she sees something like that and associates it with me...well, you see where I'm coming from.
• So I take it that a Curious George: Favorite sexual technique? post is not welcome? (gently rolling the clit over the teeth)
• Rocket, I do see your point, however, there's a lot of crap on the net, period. Whether she gets to a site through MoFi or through accidentally clicking the wrong links elsewhere, it pretty well works out the same--she's somewhere she shouldn't be. That, I'm sure, is your primary consideration. NetNanny or one of the other screening agents would be a good idea. MoFi is a loose knit group of (mostly) literate, (mostly) adults. As I stated, my OPINION is that certain sites are not that desirable, but this is a group (not a mob*) so I'm open to a group consensus. Ignore it. It might just go away. *hands out torches and begins moving toward the castle, chanting, "Kill the monster"
• My primary consideration is her seeing that stuff linked on a site that she knows Dad hangs out at. I don't want MoFi to be one of the sites I can only access after the kids go to bed. Same goes for recommending MoFi to friends. I can't do that because it might reflect badly on me.