December 28, 2004

• Couldn't this have gone in this link, you asshole?
• Up yours, drubky!!!
• elsewhere
• Pah! These gay penguins have a long way to go before they can match up the exploits of gay necrophiliac rapist ducks.
• Researchers claim they've found gay penguins December 25 2004 at 10:12AM it's a christmas miracle!
• > necrophiliac rapist Necrophilia fails the test for rape because the corpse certainly cannot give or withhold consent.
• teh pengwins r teh gay! Fuyugare: I am a Pyronecropedophiliac. There's just something about dead babies on fire that turns me on!
• Debaser626: Yeah? Well, I practice xenohomonecropedapyrobestiality. Not really.
• I for one welcome our Multiple-Personality Disorder-suffering overlords. Bad Smeagol. Down.
• I expect one of you will soon admit to writing gynophagia stories or being an alt.dolcett regular.
• (first link very NSFW if you follow any of the links from it)
• WHy hasn't this story been syndicated yet? Gay penguins are so hot right now, again.
• Necrophilia fails the test for rape because the corpse certainly cannot give or withhold consent. Or, you could argue, is de facto rape; the corpse can never consent, intercourse without consent is rape, so all necrophilia is rape. While there is a common usage implication that "lack of consent" restricts the term to cases in which consent could practically have been given, that's not explicit. Compare it with paedophilia; in some legal codes, the term "rape" is not applied to consensual intercourse with an under-aged individual, despite the fact that legally they cannot consent; in other codes (as in the US), the term rape is used, despite the fact that there is no possible situation in which such an act could have been consensual. (Obviously, your point could equally stand because we're talking about ducks, which also cannot legally give consent.) Anyhow, in the linked case the duck was killed attempting to escape a sexual assault by the other mallard, so the intention to rape was there during a period when consent could have been given, in as far a ducks can do so. The description of "homosexual necrophiliac rapist" refers to three distinct behavioural characteristics: homosexuality, necrophilia, and rapiness. And frankly, if the duck doesn't like it, he can sue me.
• The duck consents: Quack.
• Wow, I hope I'm missing some personal joke running between nostril and clockwork. That's pretty harsh, Nostril... Please, be civil.
• Nostril's just mad because he and Clockwork Orang are so alike. I get them mixed up all the time.
• in related news, was jesus gay?
• One of these days they're going to cause a rift in the space-time continuum, and then Mom is going to be sooooooo pissed.
• "Penguins in captivity "may be more likely to form same-sex pairs" due to the difficulty of finding partners of the opposite sex" if this were the case for humans, then there would be a lot more lesbians around...
• I don't really buy the captivity explanation. That sounds so much like they're trying to explain this 'horrid, unnatural behaviour'. Scientifically speaking, they haven't examined the animals' behaviour in the wild, so the conclusion is invalid. Many researchers claim that same-sex pairing has been observed in the wild in many species, though to what level I'm uncertain. It's been theorised as a response to higher levels of population as perhaps a natural evolutionary reaction. I would hazard a guess that it is entirely natural behaviour perhaps exacerbated somewhat by captivity. In any case, homosexuality is normal, natural, & occurs in nature, thus giving the lie to rabid conservatives who claim it is a disease or what-not. God clearly likes gay things, as he continues to make them. Good thing, too, I say.
• Monkeyfilter: living a rather lavendar lifestyle
• i really enjoy how stereotypes like "limp-wristed" and "benders" are antiquated and no one really has to be tongue-in-cheek about sexual orientation these days... oh wait. obviously, i was wrong.
• I think Pendek was riffing on a little MoFi argument that arose from another recent posting that used such colloquialisms. But it's difficult to tell, because Pendek is such a wanker most of the time.
• Is "lavendar" one of those 'ironic" misspellings? Or is it just that my laven-dar is down?
• hey, I just copy/paste right/wrong copy/paste
• How does one pronounce "poove"? Is it like puff or poof, does it rhyme with stove or roof? I don't plan on saying it aloud, but I'm wondering if this is the same word I've heard spoken in various British films.
• I'm pretty sure it's the same word you've heard in British films. It's not the same as poof which rhymes with hoof. Long oo as in boo. Pronounced like an upper-class twit. I don't know why Pendek chose to use this, I'm not sure if I've heard it used in anything but Carry-On films.
• Shut your mouth, tosspot!
• I hate you, Pendek.
• Pendek and Nostril are actually chutney ferrets with the hots for each other. And there's nothing wrong with that.
• Ah, me -- now I must enter the lists. Poof rhymes with aloof, proof, not with hoof. It has done so all my adult life. "It vanished -- poof! -- in a puff of smoke." As for poove -- could this be estuary English for poof? Or is it Strine? Or wot? I've not encountered this spelling until monkeyfilter, frankly. Words change. Canadians, even from Ontario, back in the fifties and sixties, used to pronounce toque exactly like toke, as in taking a hit of weed. But nowadays Ontarians seem to favour tuke as the way to pronounce this. Maybe something similar has been happneing with poof?/poove? Which, in my ignorance, I hypothesized was pronounced with a vee-sound at the end, not an eff-sound. Sort of like rhyming with Louvre. Sort of. languagehat, are ye there? Can you enlighten us?
• Poof, pooves Hoof, hooves Roof, roofs? Having been a kid in Canada in the 50's and 60's, I've always pronounced toque as "tuke", but I grew up in the west.
• Yes, bees, its a V sound at the end. When I say hoof, it is the U sound as in put, so in fact poof does rhyme with hoof, for me. I forgot, it's the Australian squashed vowels.
• I've never heard of it, but poove to me is poo with a v on the end.
• It's old fashioned. For example, satirist mag Private Eye in the 60's labelled Spike Milligan a "dirty, filthy, drunken, lecherous Irish poove". He sued them for libel. For calling him Irish.
• Monkeyfilter: Entirely natural behaviour perhaps exacerbated somewhat by captivity
• Trying to get three gay penguin couples back on the straight and narrow, zoo officials in the northern German town of Bremerhaven hoped Swedish penguin ladies would do the trick. So far, there's been no success.
• Someone fetch a priest...
• A young priest and an old priest?
• Gay penguin sweaters!!!
• Giant penguin found in NZ
• New Zealand, once home to the moa, another huge bird. Who is also no moa.
• Good-o, Bees! Magellanic Penguin Pablo Neruda Neither clown nor child nor black nor white but verticle and a questioning innocence dressed in night and snow: The mother smiles at the sailor, the fisherman at the astronaunt, but the child child does not smile when he looks at the bird child, and from the disorderly ocean the immaculate passenger emerges in snowy mourning. I was without doubt the child bird there in the cold archipelagoes when it looked at me with its eyes, with its ancient ocean eyes: it had neither arms nor wings but hard little oars on its sides: it was as old as the salt; the age of moving water, and it looked at me from its age: since then I know I do not exist; I am a worm in the sand. the reasons for my respect remained in the sand: the religious bird did not need to fly, did not need to sing, and through its form was visible its wild soul bled salt: as if a vein from the bitter sea had been broken. Penguin, static traveler, deliberate priest of the cold, I salute your vertical salt and envy your plumed pride.