December 09, 2004

• Thanks, guys. Way to polish up the ol' image.
• Coulter: "I suppose it's always, I might add, the worst Americans who end up going there. The Tories after the Revolutionary War..." She's right there - English Canada was founded by Tories, or as we like to call them, United Empire Loyalists. We're quite happy that way, too. God Save the Queen.
• Ann Coulter makes me simultaneously angry and sad. More sad, these days. I mean, what a sad way to go through life.
• If they are so wrong, why are they so popular? Tell me, why does everyone hang onto their every word?
• For the same reason people watched Gallagher smash a watermelon with a giant hammer.
• Because they're good looking?
• Is this what's passing for political discourse down there? But to address her 'argument', what are these problems that the U.S. has with Canada? That we have different approaches on health care, drugs, marriage, etc., and we HAVEN'T blown ourselves up or degraded into civil war? Is the real problem that Canada functions pretty well despite having embraced all these scary liberal values, and may serve as demonstrable proof that right-wingers like her are just flat-out wrong? More and more, when it comes to people like Ann Coulter, I have to think of Lisa's duet with Paul Anka -- 'Just Don't Look, Just Don't Look...'
• are you guys serious? these loons are popular?

  ELLIS HENICAN [Newsday columnist]: We share a lot of culture and a lot of interests. Why do we want to have to ridicule them and be deeply offended if they disagree with us? COULTER: Because they speak French. COLMES: There's something else I want to point out about the French. Is it's fashionable again on your side to denounce the French. COULTER: We like the English-speaking Canadians.

  THAT MAKES NO SENSE!!!!!1 Doe anyone seriously tune in to these idiots and say 'Yeah! Right on!' or are they just kept around as some kind of freakshow of the mentally deficient?

  CARLSON: [A]bsolutely the countries will remain allies and there will always be politicians who see it to their benefit to stomp on Bush dolls [referring to action taken by Parrish]. But no, I don't think the average Canadian feels -- the average Canadian is busy dogsledding. [...] PARRISH: No, there's not a lot of dogsledding. There's a lot of dog walking, my friend. Not a lot of dogsledding. CARLSON: Welcome to our century.

  It's a load of cheap cross-border stereotypes getting national airplay. I mean, I understand that these shows they're airing their loopy views on are quite high-profile, serious current affairs/talking head shows. I'm down with that. But if an Australian pundit (and we have a few) got up on national TV, even on a show that only 2 1/2 people watched, and said things that dumb about New Zealand (for example), it would be fuel for angry letters to the editor in both countries AND political comment AND humour for the next 12 months. And the stupid pricks would be censured at least a little bit. This is proof that 'America' the concept (at least in the minds of your dominant politicos) is seriously screwy.
• Yessiree, tucker carlson, the bowtie that took over a human brain and lived to tell the tale. And Coulter who sounds like she should cut down on her diet of raw meat.
• Is this what's passing for political discourse down there? For what it's worth, not among those of us who manage to crack a fucking book at least monthly. Why are they popular? Well, there are people who agree with everything they say, but I'd say those people constitute a small minority. I'd say they get good ratings because they open their mouths and the most outlandish shit falls out. Same reason Howard Stern is popular, only they slap a thin coat of intelligence on it. It's a freakshow. For the record, most of the US has absolutely no problem with Canada. I have never, in nearly thirty years of living in the midwest and the south, ever met a single human being who had a real problem with Canada. They might grumble about socialist-blah-blah, but nothing like the level of bile and contempt that Skeletor and Orville Redenbacher are spewing.
• The truly sad thing is that both Carlson and Coulter are much, much smarter than this. Their images are both slickly produced packages of right wing zealotry designed to attract viewers. That's all. Advertising dollars. They are actors.
• "COULTER: We could have taken them [Canada] over so easily." Hmmm, I guess the War of 1812 and us burning down the White House isn't taught in the U.S.A. anymore.
• So I take it these guys are comedians, yes? They're not *that* funny. runs away quickly.
• They'll warm up to Canadians, the instant we cut off the flow of natural-gas and electricity. Its the only thing that keeps their giant, gluttonous, super-sized azzes from freezin' every frikken winter.
• These people are not especially popular in a mainstream sense. (although they seem to have quite an audience among liberals who enjoy making themselves angry) If you express just about any viewpointm some people will be dumb enough to agree with you (see also the 10% or so oh so liberal Frenchmen who voted for the neo-Nazi in the last election)
• The French-bashing is always quite amusing. If Coulter knew anything about what she was talking about, the francophones are generally more pro-American than the anglophones (partly because of the Loyalist fact, partly because the francophone culture is more secure than the anglophone from American dominance). Thus, she's shitting on her biggest Canadian supporters. Second, bashing the French is a longstanding tradition in the U.S., going back to when the States balked at having to help the French during the Napoleonic Wars. France aided the U.S. during the Revolution, on the basis that the States would help out France when they came knocking. But they didn't. Bashing the French became a way of disguising their own shame. Third, Canadian francophones and the French are two different peoples, and have been for a few hundred years. But simple geography would tell her that, and she doesn't have any maps. I gotta stop this -- she doesn't deserve serious consideration.
• What MCT said.
• There may not be many of us, but we're damn good shots. All that hunting. Bring it on, bitches. Also, we don't bleed, because we're Socialists.
• Which is to say to our Canadian friends: ignore these two dildoes. They are not us.
• fes They surely are not. I think nations of ideas are separate from earthly borders, and certainly Monkeyland (or the much larger Congenial Smartass Town) is not bound by geography.
• The truly sad thing is that both Carlson and Coulter are much, much smarter than this. This doesn't make me sad. This makes me angry. Both of them are extremely intelligent and well-educated people who could have gone on to make one hell of a contribution to their country and the planet at large. Instead, they piss it all away on sophistry and hatred, and they do it for money and attention. If there isn't a circle of hell specifically designated for this, there should be.
• In other news, shit smells. Film at 11.
• The look on her face after she made the "they speak french" snark totally reminds me of the look on Bush's face after he flipped off the camera. It's a desperate look, that makes me feel pity.
• These people spring from the same cesspool that spawned Savage, Limbaugh, O'Reilly, Malkin, Stern, and others. They have extreme opinions because they get paid to have extreme opinions and it gets them popularity. I don't really get angry about them anymore - I just ignore their spew and move on.
• the same cesspool that spawned Savage, Limbaugh, O'Reilly, Malkin, Stern, and others You mean the good ol' U S of A, right? Yeah, that place gives me the creeps. I forget, was Ms. Malkin born in the US?
• Born in Philly in 1970.
• Coulter scares me. I'm just glad relatively few people take her seriously. MOST of these commentators, I think are just putting on an act. But I'm forced to conclude that she really does believe the things that come out of her mouth, just because no one who was "just kidding" would go as far as she does. Like when she refered to Pinochet as a "great man" Or *advocated* domestic terrorism. (Saying that it's a shame Tim McVeigh didn't drive up to the New York Times building) Or, let's be honest here, writes an entire book discussing why anyone who disagrees with her politically is a traitor to their country. Thankfully, though, I don't know anyone who buys everything she says. I think everyone just watches her for the trainwreck factor.
• P.S. I've been enjoying Andrew Sullivan's Malkin awards.
• Coulter's the closest thing to a professional troll.
• After years of dealing with the likes of Coulter and Carlson I have come to conclusion that they are the cable equivalent of message board trolls...out for a reaction, preferably a pissed off one. Ever notice how a certain subportion of rightwingers (and arguably leftwingers) seem to take a visceral joy in pissing other people off? goetter: nice link!
• damn you fuyugare!! I really must learn to type faster...
• So many idiots - so few comets.
• InnocentBystander: I agree that she and the others probably actually do believe what they say. But my advice is just to ignore them and move on. You won't convince them that they're wrong - they're not out for reasonable argument. They just want to piss people off.
• And what a good job they do.
• coulter the bread, carlson the circus
• This has always been my favorite pick to exemplify Coulter. If you're going to try for the exploitive cheesecake shot, shouldn't you pick a dress that fits? And wear it right? And what's with the bulletproof pantyhose? Is that some attempt to claim your chasteness while standing there in a rubber dress? The woman is simply a mess.
• Those aren't bulletproof hose. They're prosthetics.
• The White House Burned [MP3] - Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie (ya guys know we loves you ... even if you did forget to take your culture back :)
• Again, I'm holding all you Americans responsible for this claptrap. You can't use the "oh, sorry, I don't like Coulter and Carlson" excuse—when people think Americans, increasingly they will think of those two and their stupid, childish arguments. And why not? You're not doing anything to prove us wrong.
• As an American, I apologize for these media clowns. Canada rules. If you all need any troops quartered or anything, just E-mail me.
• internal thoughts ala me: see's red, tries to breathe, wax on, wax off, oohhhmm, cute kittens? nope not cutting it either. walks away with hurt feelings
• Thank you, chrominance, for proving that stereotyping has no borders.
• Maybe we should blend this one and the "Americans pretending to be Canadians" thread together. Because they're both ending up the same way anyway.
• Spoken like a peacenik New Zealande ... oh wait. Sorry. Kneejerk reaction. Must be my American showing. ;)
• i think there are a lot more American-hating Canadians than there are Canadian-hating Americans. When Bush visited Canada recently there were demonstrations. When our Prime Minister Paul Martin visits somewhere, no one knows where he is.
• My link wasn't meant to bash Americans; it was just meant to make fun of Coulter and Carlton 'cause they're tools...they infuriate me to no end.
• Well, what exactly do you want from us, anyways? Like I said before, many of us up here don't even understand how anything close to a majority could support the government down there and everything it's done in the past four years. It's not just Coulter and Carlson; they're just the most vocal and aggressive of the bunch. Since the election, the administration has slowly weeded out all the "troublemakers" from the cabinet and from the intelligence services. The radical right-wing is pressing its advantage at every turn to further their social-backwater agenda. And where's the opposition? Dead in the water. To those of you saying, "gee, another stereotyping bastard," consider this: with all of the obvious issues the United States has with its economy, its foreign policy, its social agenda, its health care system, etc., etc., etc., what have you done to start fixing things? What have you done to convince anyone you're not the bad guys you appear to be? This is not the first time Coulter, Carlson and company have spewed bullshit all over the airwaves. Time and time again we've stared at them and wondered, seriously, who gives these people credit? Who watches their shows, reads their books, listens to them on the radio? Do you know what we do with crackpot politicians and pundits in Canada? We ignore them. We don't give credence to Ernst Zundel and his rejection of the Holocaust. We don't actually respect the Marijuana Party and their one-trick-pony platform. I don't think too many people actually give Carolyn Parrish a whole lot of credit, even if she feels the same frustration the rest of the country does. We have real debates over our issues, however ineffectual they may be at times (hi sponsorship scandal! hello Sea King purchase!). You guys, on the other hand, continue to give crackpots airtime. If people weren't tuning in, if people weren't reading the books, if people weren't listening on the radio, then the likes of Hannity and Novak and Coulter would disappear. But they haven't. Instead, they appear on national television repeatedly arguing that Canada is a colder version of Honduras. That our opinions are unwanted unless they fall in line with the Bush agenda. That Canada is reliant on the United States for its economic survival, and that the U.S. doesn't need our trade (pop quiz, hotshot: who's the United States' biggest trading partner?). That we should shut the hell up, lest the United States roll over and crush us like a bug. This kind of talk does not make you friends, and no matter how much other Americans apologize for it, the facts remain: you engage in pre-emptive strikes without the backing of the international community, continue to consider yourselves exempt from many important global treaties, and assume that because you have military and economic strength that it doesn't matter what the rest of us think. It's like someone continually using the term "gay" or "retarded" as an insult. You might tell me you don't actually believe gay or retarded people are bad, but your words say otherwise. Finally, I'd just like to say that Al Qaeda managed to strike a blow to the United States without the benefit of an army or a state, so don't be so sure you can just steamroll over Canada. As your own terrorists have proven at Oklahoma City and elsewhere, Al Qaeda aren't the only ones who know how to put a car bomb together. </rant>
• the people have spoken
• Hear hear! (to chrominance) All I can say is that you haven't seen the worst yet. By the end of Bush's second term the US will no longer have the most 'military and economic strength'. It almost doesn't already. I remain surprised that countries aren't dumping their dollars as fast as they can. Seriously rest-of-the-world, cut your losses. The US has a long way to fall.
• Chrominance: you're getting carried away (much like Coulter and Carlson, I might add). I'm pretty sure that invading Canada is so far down the list of stupid shit for us to do that we'd run out of trees before we got to that sheet. Coulter and Carlson are talking out their ass, as is their wont and their job. Yes, certain elements of the American government are less than pleased that Canada is not wholeheartedly supporting our glorious war on terror. That is a given. Yes, certain elements of our citizenry dislike Canada because they have the temerity to speak a cheese-eating surrender-monkey language like French. But you, sir, are being just as idiotic as they by tarring us all with the same brush. Hey, we lost! There's not a whole hell of a lot we can do about it until the next election time. You guys are stuck with our godawful rhetoric for four more years, but we're stuck with the damn nightmare of having those s.o.b.'s in charge for four more years. Wake up and smell the back bacon, dude! Our own current worst enemy is us. You get to wake up and suck down a pint of two four safe in the knowledge that all you have to fear is a foreign invader. We get the ultimate ulcer because the invader is domestic and we don't even get to drown out our problems with sex and alcohol because sooner or later, they'll both be illegal on religious grounds. Believe me when I say that anything bad you fear happening to you because of us is nothing compared to what our own government is already planning to do to us. So chill out and quit assuming that everyone down here actually gives a damn what C&C have to say on anything.
• Hope y'all get your hockey back soon.
• I don't think chrominance is being idiotic at all. When around 75% of the country actively or passively supports the Bush administration, it is valid to tar us all with the same brush. What we should have done, if we had any sense, is won the election. We didn't, and the Democratic party is completely devastated. It will continue to lose because Democrats have forgotten what it means to mount a convincing opposition. The Republicans are going to be in control for a long time. No amount of criticism is unfair now, and I only wish that the world would back up their criticisms with some real action.
• 75%? Where are you getting your numbers? 52 and 48 were the last I heard. Fair criticism is acceptable. But chrominance is assuming that Bush has 100% support. Hell, he can't even get all of his own party to back him. Hopefully, Dean will put some spine back in the Democratic party by drawing the far left and the far right of the party back toward an acceptable middle. But until then, we're stuck with what we've got, which is, admittedly, a mess. That's it. I'm done. If you guys want to get hysterical, fine by me. I'm done discussing it until someone brings up something reasonable. Just stop assuming all of us down here are actually enjoying this godawful mess.
• 75% = 50% (non-voters) + 25% (half of voters)
• Blaming all Americans for the actions of a few is both simplistic and idiotic, Chrominance; as a Canadian, I find your your statements shameful. Especially so, given the attitudes expresed by most of the American members of this group As for you Fuguyar, 75% of the country supports Bush you say? Did you pluck that number out of your azz? Beause, last time I checked , it was 51-48% for Bush over kerry, with Nader taking the other percentage point.That's hardly an overwhelming mandate.

• But if an Australian pundit (and we have a few) got up on national TV, even on a show that only 2 1/2 people watched, and said things that dumb about New Zealand (for example),

  Because, you know, Australian politicians have never gotten any mileage, ever, out of making shit up about New Zealanders and benefits in Australia, right?
• Note that I'm not assuming at all that every American supports Bush; the fact we're having this debate at all is proof. What's shocking is that despite the low job approval numbers, despite Kerry's wins in the debates, despite the likes of Coulter and Carlson acting like complete dicks, despite the turning of international opinion against you, somehow you still couldn't get Bush out of office. Fine. The election's over, and Bush won. Inexplicable to me, but you move on. But democracy isn't simply about voting once every two years. What's happened since? The democrats have gone so far underground that the only people left for the far right to criticize in America is the moderate right. Where's the cry of outrage over the eleven states banning gay marriage? Is the debate over what to do in Iraq somehow less important now that Bush is president again? I'm afraid we've reached a point now where there's so much crap going on in the States that people just don't care anymore, that it's too much to argue against. What are you supposed to do when there's so much to be done? Up here we're frustrated because not only does your tanking economy and bad international image hurt us as well, the administration—and a great majority of the American people—seem to like it that way. As much as I'd like to say let the empire burn, the fact is our economy is hurt by your sinking dollar. As is China's. As is Europe's. As are a lot of others. Yes, it's worse in America than it is in Canada. We don't have to worry about the religious zealots or the police officers with assault rifles patrolling the streets. But to say we don't have to worry about the consequences of what goes on down there is far from fair. Maybe you think I'm piling on you guys. I don't actually think you support Bush or his policies. But look at it this way: up here in Canada, we can't even vote. And it's obvious no one down there with any power feels like listening to any of us. All we can do is watch the world get worse over the next four years, unless our own government grows a backbone and starts putting together a military and strengthens economic ties with other nations. Maybe you think it's unfair to blame all Americans. But you're the ones who have the ability to change things. The fact is, the only people many Americans seem to pay attention to anymore is Americans, and a small subset at that. It's a fight you'll have to wage in people's minds, to make them see what's happening and to ask them if this is really the America they want. It's a fight you'll have to win a few people at a time, and while we're doing everything we can elsewhere, we're a mite concerned that you've turned tail and run instead of pressing the attack. I'm done. You've made the point very well that Coulter + Carlson != America, and Bush != America. My question, which still hasn't been answered, is what are you going to do about them and the people who hang on their every word. And an additional question: what, especially, are you going to do about the half of the country that didn't vote at all? Because if someone doesn't care enough to vote, chances are they didn't care enough to change the way the country was headed.
• [W]hat are you going to do about them and the people who hang on their every word[?] What would you have us do? These people are immune to anything we say. Talking to a Bush voter is always frustrating to the point of tears. The last one I talked to voted for Bush because she didn't trust Kerry and. besides. as she always tells her daughters, Bush is handsome and confident. What possible thing can you say in response? (I told her that I'm glad she's getting the country she deserves.) It is foolish to even pretend that Bush and his cabinet listen to anyone but themselves. The average American has exactly zero power to change anything. The average American can barely be bothered to wake up in the morning. I suggest that you rid yourself of any expectations that America and Americans will change for the better. Coulter and Carlson are the leading edge. The rest of us are headed that way. Yes, America's fall will cause some strain on everyone else, but you should be able to manage if you plan carefully.
• Don't make me turn up my KISS records. 'Cause I'll do it.
• I'm sorry - the White House Burned link isn't working (probably doesn't allow deep-linking). Here is another link to The White House Burned, by Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie, a song every Canadian (and many Americans) should know, and a great comedy band (I really like Every OS Sucks). And to make up - Canada is Really Big, by the Arrogant Worms, if you were feeling bad after what the mean Americans whose last names begin with C said. (Also a very good comedy band - buy their albulms!) Support Canadian comedy that hasn't gone south :)
• I think it's funny how Coulter will say Liberals hate African Americans, and then go on to say something about not liking the French--that they're the cause of problems.
• Yup. The dropping US dollar is kicking the shit out of a lot of people in B.C. It's definitely had a huge impact on my business - for Americans used to getting half again as much for their dollars here, my rates have effectively gone up equivalent with the exchange rate. Mining and forestry have been hit, the film industry has been pole-axed, and tourism is next. I can't wait until the continuing war balloons the US deficit to the point where our dollar is actually worth more. At that point our economy will be paying an Iraq War Tax in lost business. Knowing this, and reading or hearing stuff like Coulter and Carlson, it is very hard to be a polite Canadian anymore.
• Michelle Malkin, even crazier then usual.
• BREAKING NEWS: PROOF OF GOD'S EXISTENCE FINALLY INCONTROVERTIBLE
• Anyone that emaciated is bound to have brittle bones.
• the only flaw in this whole lovely occurrence is that eventually said wire will be removed... I wonder if we could have a telethon, Jerry Lewis MDA-style, to keep the wire attached, permanently... maybe we could even make some extra money and get a little shellfish hammer for her brittle little claws to keep them away from keyboards, too?
• Seems that the wheel might have a sense of irony.