November 11, 2004

From Beyond the Grave The late Dame Barbara Cartland, having written and published more than 700 books in her lifetime, left behind her the manuscripts of 160 romances. That's 13 years' worth of books.
posted by Skrik 20 years ago
  • Cool. She's the 2Pac of shlock!
  • .
  • When she was aged 77 her publishers asked her to work harder to meet rising demand. Heartless bastards. No wonder she dropped dead at 98. The cause: overwork.
  • Ghastly.
  • This is dispiriting news.
  • I'll always think of her as the author of "Apocalypse of the Heart", a novel that was featured in an advertisement about the fictional Gramercy Press publishing house that, in spite of being fictional, actually published a novel which is actually available in "real life". Now, isn't that romantic? We'll miss you, Dame Barbara!
  • Well, she had a good run for it, anyway. RIP Queen of Shlock Paging Bees, Pleggy or one of our other po-ets to come up with a verse for her tombstone. Alas, her breasts are no longer heaving.
  • Yer killin' me, GramMa!
  • Her breasts are no longer heaving, The bodice remains unripped, Now this takes a bit of believing; Babs written out of God's script! The face-powder makers are moaning, The pink satin weavers gone home, The library shelves can stop groaning, Beneath the weight of each tome. Where now is the maid and her lover? The passion that drives them insane? If you've read the books cover to cover, Why don't you just read them again? Oh God, I think I'm chanelling Pam Ayres. Help me, help me!
  • ))) for Plegmund!!!