November 11, 2004

Curious, George: Help me dress my husband, please? Mr. MonkeyToes has decided that he needs more flair in his professional wardrobe. Any recommendations for books on clothing for men? Ideal book leans toward the classic and conservative, and has color illustrations. Though I recall a thread on this topic on Metafilter, my MeFi-fu turned up nothing, and Amazon offers too much choice. What book has helped you or your guy become a spiffier dresser?
  • I have often wondered about this. My main problem area on the spectrum, is squarely between "bumming around at home" (T-shirt and shorts) and "professional" (suit + tie). Like I have no idea when it looks good to wear a button up-shirt or T-shirt outside of pants/trousers rather than tucked in. Or whether it's ok to wear a shirt designed for a tie (i.e. with a button collar) without the tie. And so on. I don't mind being individualistic but I've gotten myself in social trouble before trying to invent my own fashion sense.
  • And I should pre-emptively say to screw ideas from GQ and the like... the fashions in there are too trendy, too experimental, and too expensive.
  • #1 rule: It's never okay to wear a t-shirt tucked in. Never.
  • Bollocks to you, BBF.
  • Well, Argh, at least he's happy...
  • Once when I was looking for info on pin stripes I came across Tips for Putting Together A Corporate Wardrobe for Your Man. It has a bibliography at the end and even though the mention of "static's" might put you off, I liked that it gave detailed wardrobe suggestions rather than just general statements about how to dress.
  • Mens Fashion
  • An Amazon search brought up this book, and if you check out the "customers who bought this" section, there are several others that look promising. You might check them out in a local bookstore before buying. Another thought is that the better department stores may have (did at one time) the ability to have a "personal shopper" where someone will put together a wardrobe based on an individual's lifestyle, but but with knowledge of what's classic or trendy. I had a female friend who hated to shop who would use that service once or twice a year since she hated to shop. She wound up with great wardrobes. Even if you don't buy everything (or much of) that the shopper suggests, you could take the suggested ideas to some other store and use them to your advantage.
  • And I should pre-emptively say to screw ideas from GQ and the like... the fashions in there are too trendy, too experimental, and too expensive. Hmpf. I was just about to say, you should pick up some fashion magazines, as what is "classic and conservative" is always changing. The best way is to look at what other men are wearing, and believe it or not, they print publications explictly for this purpose! And GQ is actually one of the more conservative men's fashion rags out there. Or just drop him off at Barney's. The salespeople will do the rest.
  • I don't know how far and wide one can find The Men's Wearhouse, but the staff are quite good at accessorizing the clothes they sell, and that's where they make their profit. Their prices on suits are great, but never let them sell you shoes, socks or a belt. Once you've picked a suit, though, they're going to present you with a combination of interchangeable shirts and ties that all work well together.
  • MonkeyToes: get him a subscription to Men's Health magazine. They have great advice on style, as well as exercise, nutrition, and sex (he may learn something). I used to subscribe, and it's a great read (one of the few non steroid and non gay-centric exercise mags out there). For starters, just check out the 'style' section of their website.
  • Your monkey eyes for the straight guy are helpful -- keep the suggestions coming. Oh, and Argh, don't encourage the Mister's habit. I keep hiding his camo weekend baseball cap (not unusual in our part of the world), but somehow it always turns up again.
  • I was lent a book called the "gentleman's wardrobe" by an upper class friend (or at least he had pretensions of being upper class). Things I specifically remember from it were the numerous ways to tie a tie, when tweed is acceptable, what to wear on a grouse shoot, and why you can never go wrong with brogues. Obviously i gave it no heed and was promptly turfed out of the hunting weekend for wearing a shell suit. Whoda thought there was a dress code.
  • As a guy in suit here's what I do to keep from looking like a complete schlep without going broke: You can't cut corners on the suit -- a good one is key. The only way I've found to cut costs there is to use Brooks Brothers factory outlets. The other stuff can be done much more cheaply: TJ Maxx (aka Winners in Canada) for ties, belts, shirts. Walmart for undies and socks and various other odds and sodds. Eddie Bauer/Gap/Banana Republic for casual Friday stuff. And every guy needs a woman friend with a sense of style who is given a veto power over proposed purchases!
  • It's not what a man wears but how he wears it that counts.
  • In my experience, the magazines are close to useless for building up a wardrobe because although they show you nice new garments, they don't show you how (and *why*) they fit together. They don't teach style at all. They show off transient fashion, which is no good whatsoever. Men's clothing at its smartest is bound by some quite strict guidelines, and it's only when you know them all that you can venture beyond them, if that makes any sense. By far the best guide to this sort of thing, is Gentleman, by Bernhard Roetzel. Amazon doesn't have the cover art, but this site does. It's not just good for outfits: it also has some great chapters on the people and places who make good examples of the clothes, shoes, hats and so on. I first saw it in my tailor's fitting room, and walking back toward Regents Street I must have passed half of the people featured in it. The models are a tad too mid-nineties in hairstyle, but the ideas are as close to classic as you'll get. (including, it has to be said, the classic ways of wearing denim and baseball caps). And classic is really what you want, unless you plan on spending an awfully large amount of money to have him look almost but not quite like the guys in the magazines.
  • Having gone through this with my own SO this year, I discovered the staff in departments stores can help tremendously. He went to a quality store for some very good advice and a few pieces that will last. Now that he knows what to look for, he can add on the extras elsewhere and feel confident that he's building a good wardrobe.
  • I second rxreed's suggestion.
  • This AskMe thread may or may not be what you're remembering. As is mentioned there, Dressing the Man: Mastering the Art of Permanent Fashion by Alan Flusser is a fantastic resource.
  • Although I'm a HUGE fan of looking things up in books, I'm not sure he's going to find the answer to this question in print. The answer depends heavily on what his coworkers are like. For example, something that would be considered "flair" by a group of cutting-edge metrosexual graphic designers would be considered "appalling" by a group of accountants. The easy out is for him to dress exactly like everyone else he works with. (And when in doubt, err on the conservative side.) I guess I would have to ask, what kind of people does he work with? What sort of "feel" does his office have? And what kind of flair is he looking for? Just accessories, or a complete wardrobe makeover?
  • rolypolyman - I would try a button up dress shirt without a tie - maybe blue, maybe dark. Combined with trousers or nicely kept jeans (maybe pressed), it can make for a very nice neat but casual look. Also, many men look much better with a proper collar than without one (like a T-shirt) - my fiance wears button up shirts all the time, and they are very comfortable, and very flattering. Really buff men can look better in T-shirts - but most men look better in collared shirts.
  • Hmmm. Try this, then be sure to top it off with some bling. On second thought, this might be more topical. Ghetto fabulous.
  • I think wearing clothes is an individual thing, and getting tips from books and magazines is a bad idea. Look at what other people are wearing, notice the ones that look well-dressed and try to figure out what they're doing right. Better yet, find someone with good taste and ask for tips. He's bound to be flattered, and if he's a friend he'll probably take you shopping, too... a friend of Dorothy, that is ;-). Kidding.
  • I recommend Off The Cuff by Carson Kressley, from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. I've recently purchased it as part of the process of revamping my wardrobe after losing a lot of weight.
  • The Top Book: "Dressing the Man" by Alan Flusser. It is THE BOOK on classical men's fashion. That said: GQ, Esquire, etc are good resources for ideas, not actual stuff. Unless you have a bazillion dollars, most of the stuff adverted in thise magazines are going to be out of your league, price-wise. But that's OK - what you do is look at those things for clues as to what sorts of things look good together, what sorts of items you'd want to add to your wardrobe. They also have at least a couple articles each month discussing basic fashion sense and questions - VERY valuable, those. OK, knowing nothing of what he has or wears, there are several key pieces that he'll want to acquire to form a baseline professional wardrobe: (1) a blue pinstripe suit; (2) a dark grey suit. Those are your two basic professional suits. The Grey is your bullet suit - that's his all-business look. The pintripe is going to be his "off" suit - it's going to be more stylish, and he's going to couple it with a bit more color. The grey should be something along the lines of a standard American cut (a "sack suit"); straight off the rack onto his body is NO GOOD - you'll want at the very least to have them tailor the pants and adjust the jacket sleeves to better fit him (that goes for both); the pinstripe, I'd go with a more European cut - broader in the shoulders, tighter at the hip, full break on the pants. Those two suits will carry him a long way - with a selection of shgirts and ties, he'll be able to mix and match them in a variety of different combos. To those suits, you want to flesh out his options - pants in unstriped blue, black, chocolate brown, khaki and (I like) a glen plaid - mix 'em up between pleated (those should get cuffs) and flat front (no cuffs); dress shirts in white (get two - you have to think of white dress shirts as disposable, because things just *happen* to them), ecru (that's that pale yellow), blue (two again), pink (brings out the skin tone), and whatever color you think goes best with his particular hair/skin/eye color (I have brown hair and hazel eyes so me, so I would get something in an olive or khaki here). Mix them up bwteeen two kinds of collars - the button down collar, which is a more casual collar, and the English spread, which is more formal and, imo, the most flattering. Very Important: a good quality blue blazer - he'll use this constantly. A grey hopsack jacket. A black blazer, of different cut from the blue. A tweed jacket (skip the patches). A lighter heft, more casual jacket, maybe in linen. Two pairs shoes: black wingtips, brown captoes. A black trenchcoat. That's the basics. (more...)
  • Then: ties. The tie is the one aspect of his wardrobe where he can exercise the most creativity and personality. That said, there are a few ground rules. Ties go in and out of style too. Early on, avoid the arty stuff, the big blotches of color ones - stick with solids, striped "repp" ties (wide stripes on an angle, two colors), subtle geometric patterns, and demure paisleys. Don't be afraid to bring along your shirts and suit jackets when you go tie shopping - you want those colors to blend well. Every man alive has a shoebox full of ties that looked great in the store but didn't go with a damn thing once they got home. After a while, he'll start to develop his own sense of style, become more comfortable with the looks and colors that he likes and that look good on him. A couple things: it's ok to experiment with stripes, colors, etc - if he thinks it looks good, and you think it looks good? It probably looks good. Trust your instincts and, hey, if you botch it? It's just a day's clothes. The next thing is, cultivate his ability and willingness to shop for his clothes. Men, by and large, don't know what the fuck they're doing in a store - they want to go in, get what they need, and get out. He's got to fight that. The best things to learn are (a) go to a better class of store. He's going to pay a little more, it's true, but at the same time, the clothes that he buys will be of better quality (means they'll look better and last longer) and more immportantly, he'll be dealing with a better class of salesman. Learning to take advantage of the knowledge and expertise of good salesmen was about as valuable a lesson in clothes as I have ever learned. The *want* to help you! And typically, they know what they're talking about and, if they don't, it's usually pretty obvious. A good salesman is worth his weight in gold. Also: find a good dry cleaner and a good tailor. The dry cleaner is obvious - ask your trusted salesman who he uses. A good tailor, on the other hand, is not for making you suits - he's for fixing what you have. Men put on weight, start working out, pull out their seams, hook their sleeves on things, etc - a good tailor can fix these things. What he can also do is make bargain buys fit you right! I've bought shirts on Ebay that were a little off my size, then had them tailored to fit, saved me big bucks. That's a start. Hope this helped :)
  • I've had great success at used men's clothing stores. I live a few hours from Houston, which has a plethora. They seem to have a wider selection if you are an unusual size, i.e., tall and thin. I picked up three nice suits at one, including a Ralph Lauren wool suit, for thirty bucks each. After that, shirts and ties were cheap. I was given two tips: 1. No tie with a button-down collar. 2. Stripey shirt, solid tie.
  • THIS is the book you're looking for (amazon ordering link, check out the first review). The first and best of the chicsimple series, this book has clear, color, "eyewitness"-style photos of the basics for a clean, elegant wardrobe for both men and women (and hey, used copies start at only 64 cents!) It has all the info you need (the best parts, I found, are on how to dress casually without dressing TOO casually, and the mix-and match sections with pictures of the example garments in different outfits), without being too overwhelming with details. GET IT GET IT GET IT!
  • I love Fes.
  • I would like to add a plea for all men to please stop wearing pleated pants. They make you look like you have hips, and hips are for girls. Whew, I feel better getting that off my chest. Thanks.
  • Cali my dear, the men you've seen who look like they have girl-hips from their pleated pants are wearing pleated pants that don't fit them right (which reiterates my earlier point: have your business trousers *tailored* to fit you! My tailor charges like $10-$15 a pair, which is a super cheap price to pay for not looking like I have girl-hips). Dress slacks come with pleats for two reasons: first, men tend, as they get older, to paunch at precisely that spot, and pleats hide that; second, when men sit, their guts tend to collect in their upper laps, as do their pants, and pleats allow that to occur with a minimum of bindination. Pleats provide room, you see - to move, to relax, to sit, to be a fatty-boombalatty. Flat fronts tend to be more flattering to the younger, fitter man - but imagine, say, your grandfather or your Uncle Moe in a pair. Not for the squeamish, I'd imagine. I was given two tips: 1. No tie with a button-down collar. 2. Stripey shirt, solid tie. Yes and no. I am, by the way, breaking BOTH of these rules today, and yet I think that I'm not entirely offensive, sartorially speaking. First, the button-downs: button down collars were an invention of the English aristos, who didn't like it when their collars would fly up when they were out riding on the moors or whatever. They are, indeed, an inherently more casual shirt, but so far as I know wearing a tie with them is OK. What you want to do is pick the tie judiciously - no fat-knot Zegna's for your button-down. You want something that will give you a slimmer knot (use a four-in-hand, rather than a Windsor variation, to keep it tight) and overall a skinnier tie. Similarly, stripes and patterns *can* go together very well. I'm wearing a DKNY shirt (button down collar) in grey with black windowpanes; over that I have a silver-grey tie with thin angled white stripes, and over that a grey pinstripe jacket, pinstripes are white but with very subtle hints of amber. That's the key, in most cases, when mixing patterns: subtlety. In the three items I have on today, the patterns are both thin and subtle, almost afterthoughts. Overlaid, they compliment rather than cross. Action photo available upon request. *raises glass to Wolof in salute* Likewise, my friend!
  • Also: I'm wearing pleated pants, and rather than girl-hips, mine are more reminiscent of the powerful pistoning systems one might find on, say, a steam locomotive, or the leeward half of a largish tiger >:D
  • Wow, never know what you'll learn browsing mofi. Thanks Fes.
  • an invention of the English aristos... Your words are, as ever, a pleasure and an education to read, Fes, but I was surprised by the above because my father has always told me that button-down collars, which he considers abominable, were "invented by the Yanks". A bit of research suggests that they were indeed based on English polo shirts, but that it was John Brooks (of Brooks Brothers) who first introduced them as non-sporting wear.
  • Fes - you're not wearing those fuzzy black and yellow striped trousies again?
  • I'll be damned! I shall defer to Flusser, who confirms your version: "The Button-Down Collar: The button-down collar was first introduced in this country by Brooks Brothers, patterned after the polo shirt worn in England. As explained earlier, the collar was originally fastened down in order to prevent flapping in the player's face during a match. This collar, unlike all others, is soft and meant to remain that way. It is without doubt the most comfortable collar and represents nothing less than the American spirit by producing a casual image so in tune with our heritage. It has been popular every decade since the twenties, and since its origins are definitely in sport, it is not considered a particularly dressy collar. Since it never lies exactly the same way, it offers an unpredictable buckling about the neck, thereby reflecting the wearer's individuality. It is a collar long associated with the Ivy League look and is especially complementary to the natural-shoulder suit. It is appropriately worn with tweed sports jackets and women suits. The Brooks Brothers original model remains the best version, for its points are long, permitting a "roll" that changes as the wearer moves. The button-down collar will accommodate a Windsor knot or a four-in-hand, and when worn with a bow tie, it projects the ultimate professorial image. " My apologies for the misstatement. Since so much of modern businesswear stems from the British horseman, I must have assumed the buttondown did as well.
  • you're not wearing those fuzzy black and yellow striped trousies again? Nah, the big coaldust-covered iron ones.
  • Pin-striped bananas for all! Thanks for your suggestions. Sohcahtoa, you have saved my sanity; that was the thread I was looking for. Fes, kudos to you, you stylish monkey. And as for Mr. MonkeyToes, it's time to go shopping (muhahahaha).
  • My pleasure! Hope it helps.
  • Fes, doesn't an outfit of sartorial splendor such as you describe yourself to be wearing deserve the ultimate accessory?
  • BlueHorse, I suspect strutting a swordcane these days would excite the (unfavourable) attention of the authorities. Especially not recommended for airports.