January 10, 2004

Insults! Insults! Insults! Insults! Insults!
  • My favourite insult is still contemtously muttering moron, just as you turn and walk away from someone. I don't know why I like it so much, though.
  • Comedy gold.
  • W. C. Fields, link one: What contemptible scoundrel stole the cork out of my lunch? [Timetravels to link three above] ...stand in fire up to the navel and in ice up to th'heart, and there th' offending part burns and the deceiving part freezes. Wow, a grand toy, flashboy!
  • Best.Post.Of.The.Day.
  • (Why yes I am on my period.)
  • Kurt Vonnegut Jr. had my favorite via Slapstick: "Why don't you go take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut? Why don't you go take a flying fuck at the Moooooooooooooooooooooooon?"
  • I adore Kurt Vonnegut, forksclovetofu, and his insults always were perfect, you're right.
  • My current favourite insulting neologism is 'cocksmith', coined by some of my friends. "You are such a cocksmith." It has the advantage that you can shorten it to just 'smith', and thus mutter it (much like dng mutters 'moron') at the end of annoying phone calls, and the like. And, while they won't have a clue what you're on about, you get the satisfaction of audibly insulting them... Vonnegut gives good insult. Also very fond of Patrick O'Brian's authentic 1800's British naval insults, "Dutch-built bugger" (as seen above) being one, and "mumping villain" being another particular favourite.
  • Hmm, can there be a "cockpunchsmith?"
  • next time you want to just shut someone UP, call them "buttplug breath"!!!! harharharharheheheheheheee!!!
  • A book no less! This should also be posted in the self-post filter thread, except that languagehat doesn't come around here anymore.