October 02, 2004

"I enclose two small deposits , selected with great care from my cats litter tray, as an expression of my utter and complete contempt for both you, and your pointless company. I sincerely hope that they have not become dessicated during transit - they were satisfyingly moist at the time of posting, and I would feel considerable disappointment if you did not experience both their rich aroma and delicate texture."
posted by quonsar 20 years ago
  • This just completely fails to load for me. Luckily the Coral version works.
  • Pretty smooth operation, this NTL.
  • F*cking brilliant. Pretty much describes the kind of service a company a friend of mine used to work for gave. That's why she used the rival's service, to her ex-employers total indifference.
  • In my experience, the biggest red flag for bad customer service is a website loaded with "shiny happy people". For example, Earthlink, AOL, and SBC. Wish a Wankometer could be developed for shiny happy people graphics.
  • I'd like to know where to get a cat that makes a "small deposit?" Mine are both set to gargantuan...
  • Let's see...the standard feline adjustment from "gargantuan"...ah, here. You have to rotate the tail counter-clockwise until it clicks three times. That should set the cat to "small", which initially is also the factory default. HTHHAND.
  • clockzero wins.
  • NTL, eh? What a coincidence. NTL is reeling from an embarrassing and potentially offensive howler which meant callers to its customer services helpline were told to "f*ck off". According to newspaper reports, the company is attributing the message that replaced its usual recorded greeting to a malicious hacker or a disgruntled employee. The message in full, which contained a flurry of four-letter words, said: "Hello. You are through to NTL customer services. We don't give a f*ck about you. We are never here. We will f*ck you about, basically, and we are not going to handle any of your complaints. Just f*ck off and leave us alone. Get a life."
  • No f*cking need to f*cking click on my f*cking link, f*cking obviously.
  • I, too, have suffered greatly at the hands of NTL. They are indeed a bunch of worthless cretins.
  • "Good news everybody! NTL is taking over ISP Virgin Net!"