September 04, 2004

Tips for the traveler in the U.S. From Under the Fire Star.
posted by PF 20 years ago
  • Please get used to saying, `Please' and `Thank you' frequently. Any request needs to be prefaced with a `please', and upon receiving it, a warm `thank you' is the absolute expectation. What America is this person talking about? I am careful to say Please and Thank You, and frequently find I'm the only one saying it. It's even better when they look at you like you're nuts. You are going to a place where even a two-year-old cannot ask his mom for a glass of water, without being gently prompted, "Didn't you forget something?" Hahahahahaha! When's the last time you heard that in public? Just the other day I helped a kid at Starbucks find the checkers for the checkerboard. Both the child and his mother stared at me in silence until I left. Why do people stare at me so much, anyway?
  • cabingirl: I always found the best response for being stared at is to bark at the person. They stop staring at you anyways.
  • Under the Fire Star is a grand blog by a talented writer, Nancy Gandhi. Never know what you'll find there next -- which doesn't matter, since it's so well-done it snares you right away.
  • *reads Under the Fire Star, enjoys*
  • Brush up your table manners and be silverware savvy. Haha. Most Americans can't even eat with knife and fork. And certainly not with the fork in the left hand. But they have other qualities. /heading out to upstate NY for family visit.
  • I still get in trouble with my mom for not saying "ma'am."
  • What, to your mother? *eyes bug out*
  • Nancy Gandhi also occasionally posts to Living in India, as for example here. One of my favorite bloggers for a long time.
  • I really want to spend some time in India. But I think life may have intervened. Maybe later. Seriously, it's on my list.
  • I agree with the please and thank you advice. The fact that the incident in Starbucks stands out in your mind says just how common their use still is. And I can't tell you how many times my Spanish teacher had to remind me not to say "por favor" before every request. If someone never or rarely used please and thank you I would think they were an ass.
  • I've always wanted to compile a lot of foreigner's guides to my country -- Canada actually, but of course there would be more USA-specific stuff out there. I bet it would be very revealing.
  • I think that we need to remember that to say that "America is like x" is kind of an overgeneralization. There areas where if you didn't say thank you to someone they might tell you to fuck off and there are places where if you said thank you they might look at you strangely. I'm in a college in the midwest and while this is by far the biggest town i've ever lived in, it is the smallest most of my friends have lived in and many of them remark how irritatingly friendly people here are, while I find them overwhelmingly rude.
  • I have yet to meet these people who take offense at being thanked. Where do they live, so I can be sure never to visit such places?
  • Tensor, I think they're the same people who are really obnoxious at Fantasy Football drafts. (-:
  • *whimper*
  • The fact that the incident in Starbucks stands out in your mind says just how common their use still is. Actually, I was just using it as a convenient illustration of what I see nearly every day. It stands out in my mind because I was taught to be polite by my parents, and it pisses me off to see that lost in many of today's kids (that I seem to interact with, anyway). I have yet to meet these people who take offense at being thanked. Where do they live, so I can be sure never to visit such places? I live in the Twin Cities, but I'm not from here. I think that has alot to do with it, actually. "Minnesota nice", and all that bullshit.
  • cabingirl, I agree with you. My parents were very big on manners and being polite. I, in turn, have done the very same with my children and the children of my siblings (who, for some reason forgot to), and I always get compliments from people who are surprised at how naturally polite my kids are. At four and two years old, it's second nature with them. It helps that that's how we are in our home as well.
  • Joel of Far Outliers has been reading Naipaul's book on the South, A Turn in the South. This is the first post. This is the most recent post.