September 02, 2004

• She's my sister.
• She's my daughter.
• My sister.
• My daughter.
• My sister.
• My daughter.
• She's my sister and my daughter.
• She's my sister AND my daughter! /Alabama bashing
• Snap!
• He chooses to forget that he's already avenged his wife's rape and murder.
• It actually was a missile.
• ...and the tassle with the fossil has the moo that is brew...
• The ewoks end up winning.
• Ripley saves Newt. Only to have her die at the beginning of the next film...
• We see the ominous L.A. cityscape at night. Spectral washed out images float over it, just like at the beginning of the movie. This time we can see Betty and Camilla's faces. Then there's a shot of an odd, heavily made-up actress from the club the women went to. "Silencio," she says.
• Keyser Soze was dead the whole time.
• Northrup, Eastman, McSouthers, and WESTing. ...and no one has a clue what I'm going on about.
• I will wave a tiny lavender flag in celebration of metafilter's ability to have fun :P
• I don't need to know. I let Google do all my knowing. Yeah, MetaFilter is soooo cool!
• It sinks.
• He's got his father's eyes.
• Take those out of his mouth!
• miles marries francesca instead of anna. egg dumps milly. warren returns and laughs at them all.
• They all gang up on DaisyMae, but the thread lives forever.
• He betrays all his mates, and ends up just like you.
• The woman clutches the child to her chest. Freeze frame. Child's eyes begin glowing red and demonic laughter is heard. The island is full of zombies. Everyone dies. The main killer? He/She/It isn't actually dead. Still stalking the night looking for blood/brains/souls/oven baked cookies. /Every 80's horror film ever.
• The butler did it. Good to see they can still have fun, but then, I haven't seen Seth post yet. I wanna see the original spoiler post re. The Office. Damn mathowie's rewriting of MetaHistory! Also, posting a MeFi post? Would anyone here not have read it there? :P
• They have a re-count and the other guy becomes president.
• He figures it out, only to discover that there was nothing to figure out, so he forgets about it, and presumably tries to figure it out again.
• The album becomes a smash hit in Japan, saving the tour and the band.
• They kill Piggy, but Ralph survives through the night 'till they are discovered by a navy ship, when they all realize what they've become.
• He finds the murder weapon in the shed, with dried blood and hair still on it, and realizes that his wife committed the murder he'd been on trial for.
• Actually, me. I wouldn't have known about the post on MeFi without the post here. I don't read MeFi. Unless path tells me that there's something I need to go look at, anyway. I just like Monkeys better. But on the other hand, I'm sure that I'm a part of a very small minority around here. Done rambling. Carry on.
• Monkeys win. Monkeys win. Monkeys kinda win. Monkey loses.
• Awww crap Bevos! I'm in the middle of that one! "Just one last MoFi reload before bed..." oh well... :)
• 1) She dies happy, and not a virgin anymore 2) He bears his brother's children! 3) She brings out his missing lover's fantasies to the world 4) He's gone bonkers. Poor guy.
• War breaks out. All the brothers end up giving it to the Fat Lady.
• They open memberships. One week later, server crashes again. :) Ah, don't understimate them blue people, Christophine. Lately, they've been having more and more MoFi links.
• Miss Piggy shot JR
• It was only a dream. *waves at Patrick Duffy, who doubtless egosurfs in small yet perfectly formed circles every day*
• He dies in the end.
• Everyone dies in the end.
• Everyone but him dies in the end.
• The End.
• OR IS IT?!
• Everybody but ilyadeux dies in the end.
• I see Patrick Duffy is tardy in answering his shoutouts. I'd drown him, but apparently it's not possible, him coming from Mylanta and all.
• Kenny dies.
• It's a sled.
• whoo! I win! /dances like no one is watching, because hey, they're dead. Unless they've become zombies...
• Everybody gets fat. Except for Mama Cass.
• Except for Mama Cass. Turn and turn, turn and turn ... Nostril knows what I mean.
• The King is dead. Long live the King. *and then you wake up*
• No one else has done it, so I gotta say: love the Nine Billion Names of God reference.
• The starbaby appears, "Also Sprach Zarathustra" starts playing again, and you wonder what you just watched for the better part of three hours.
• She decides in the end that she wants more of his hair gel.
• THANK you plutor. I recognised the line, but couldn't remember the story's name.
• HA! i clicked on the mefi link and posted the "chinatown" ending before even reading this one. heh.
• Shoeless Joe Jackson plays the best game of his life. Too bad he's dead.
• The black dude gets eaten and the white chick jumps into moving helicopter blades.
• The vogons wind up destroying the earth again, this time with everyone on it.
• No animals were harmed making this movie.
• People explode into gooshes of amniotic fluid, robots get crucified, people on the internet fight over What It All Means for the next 10 years. Meanwhile, the director, no doubt, laughs and laughs. (Hey, someone has to cover that base.) (The Nine Billion Names line still gives me chills. Brr.)
• Heat death.
• After sending more cops, an Army general gets a call in the middle of the night from some plucky survivors and promptly nukes Nashville.
• Howard stays and becomes the manager of a crappy 80's girl band.
• Jesus gets tacked up. But he gets over it. posted by stavrosthewonderchicken at 2:29 AM PST on September 1 stavros may have outdone himself here.
• The cleaner dies and the girl plants his plant.
• When he was a child, he saw a man being shot to death in an airport. He grew up, traveled back in time, and ended up being that very man, shot to death in the airport. And the army of the 12 monkeys didn't actually release the plague that ended the world; they just freed some monkeys from the zoo.
• and then forest whittaker realized that SHE WAS REALLY A HE.
• Jesus kills the head vampire, so all the lesbians can live without fear.
• Gollum bites Frodo's ring finger, severing it. While prancing around in glee, he falls into the lava burbling within Mount Doom, and the Ring is destroyed. Some other stuff happens, and there is an overly long ending. Oh, and Samwise gets crazy laid by a buxom hobbit bitch.
• Otto the autopilot flies off in the plane, accompanied by a newly-inflated female autopilot. Hey, wouoldn't it be cool if we started posting Memento spoilers just as that crazy comment-going-in-reverse-order thing started happening?
• He realises that he was dead all along. He actually died in the incident in 'Nam, and the visions he had of demons were really of angels, trying to break him out of his delusion as he lay dying in the medivac 'copter.
• His best mate beats the crap out of him, then he leaves for the middle of nowhere, except not really.
• He slides back into bed just before his parents open the door, realizes the taped snoring is still playing on his stereo, and throws the baseball across the room to hit the stop button. His parents never suspected a thing.
• I'M SPARTACUS!
• He's Spartacus!
• He's Spartacus and he's OK! He sleeps all night and he hacks all day. He avenges Crixus, he frees the slaves, And wears suspenders and a bra!
• I'm flashboy.
• I'm flashboy, and so's my wife.
• The president storms in threatens him, gloats, admits to killing his wife. Turns out he's covered in source gas. President is impeached. Our hero retires to Mountain, with filthy assistants, degenerative brain disease unexpectedly enters recession.
• Judgement Day happens as planned.
• Judgement Day is preempted by the Super Bowl.
• The recount issue comes before the Supreme Court. As a result of their decision (a 5-4 split) all recounts are halted, effectively handing Bush the presidency.
• The hero's house is destroyed in a massive hurricane.
• Jon kills Kovacs with a gesture and leaves the known universe. Dan and Laurie get makeovers. The world is at peace. And then the gopher reaches for the slushpile.
• It's not komodo dragon - it's chicken. It's really tomorrow - the Sonny and Cher is just a dj screw up. Her heart goes on.
• That was exactly what I was thinking about Memento, flashboy. GET OUT OF MY HEAD!
• "Let off some steam, Bennett."
• Northrup, Eastman, McSouthers, and WESTing. babywannasofa...... i LOVE that book. Holy shit! (Wait, is it my turn? Umm...) Julianne Moore is not only Ed Harris's mother, but still alive. HA!
• My favorite part was the dancing hippos.
• Bond saves the world, makes it out alive, and still gets the girl.
• Goodnight Grandma. Goodnight, John Boy.
• They were no longer little girls . . . they were little women.
• Goodnight Moon.
• I was having fun with that thread, until I was actually spoiled on a movie I haven't seen and want to.
• He rises again on the third day but still neglects to sort out his affairs so his relatives have to go gathering documents and appear before the Sanhedrin to prove who is next of kin only it turns out he'd altered his life insurance so that it paid out to some girl in Arizona who wanted to go see France and he practically begged to be killed only the documents were found on a man who was the beneficiary's grandfather which is a bit suspicious if you ask me and I don't believe that Billy the Kid malarky not for an instant so it could be that it actually was time travel and the lady who kept checking her mailbox might have been onto something after all with her time travel book.
• THE END OF THE BEGINNING
• So in America when the sun goes down and I sit on the old broken-down river pier watching the long, long skies over New Jersey and sense all that raw land that rolls in one unbelievable huge bulge over to the West Coast, and all that road going, all the people dreaming in the immensity of it, and in the land where they let the children cry, and tonight the stars'll be out, and don't you know that God is Pooh Bear?