August 20, 2004

Want to smell like you just got a Hummer? Since destroying the environment is so much better when the driver (male only, of course) is properly accessorized, Hummer cologne is now available for consumption. '"It's got credibility with men," said Adrian Ellis, "What other brand for men would make more sense?"'
posted by es el Queso 20 years ago
  • But it smells like thyme, fir, cardamom and sandalwood? That's sissy shit! In a perfect world, Hummer cologne would smell just like Arnold Schwarzenegger's sweaty nutsack.
  • I expected this link to be SOOOOOO much dirtier than it is...
  • Yeah, I don't ever want to smell like I just got a Hummer, even if it means that I really just got a Hummer. I always try to shower afterward.
  • excuse me while I projectile vomit...
  • "It's got credibility with men," said Adrian Ellis, "What other brand for men would make more sense?" Sweaty Nutsack For Men
  • But does it have the sound, too?
  • Defamer wins. "Hummer Cologne: When you absolutely, positively must reek of a small penis."
  • So, this cologne - it makes you smell like you have a small penis, yes?
  • Hummers suck.
  • Ohhhhhhhhhh. THAT kind. (Tenacious - me, too.)
  • "I'm in," said Lashein Seabrook, 24, of Brooklyn. "I spend $50 to $100 on Kenneth Cole Black, but this looks pretty good. I'll try it." it looks good? The logical progression leading to the conclusion that what the bottle looks like it more important than the smell of a cologne - suddenly I understand why this man would drive a Hummer. If you or anyone you know ever meets Lashein Seabrook, point and laugh. Mock him, mock him mercilessly for being the tool that he is, in every sense of the word.
  • I wonder what goetter smells like.;)
  • Whoa. /keanu I can't even begin to describe how appalled I am at this development. Not that I'm surprised. Just appalled. targeting 25- to 45-year-olds with a penchant for the ultra-masculine The Tom of Finland designer fragrance. Snort. Here's the lame thing itself, in all its marketing glory. (What a pity that our computer don't have SmellBlaster Pro cards, so we can all appreciate the no doubt effusive manliness of this product from a safe distance.) What this shit should smell like is Stanadyne Fuel Conditioner. I don't know what's in the Stanadyne, but its scent makes me happy. Every time I dump some in the fuel tank I sneak a whiff, and smile. /grateful that he missed this a week ago