August 06, 2004

The end of music. "I'm fascinated by the idea of, say, your favourite band writing something that you can't stand. I've often asked people: What's your least favourite track by your favourite band?" Taken from the blue, I wanted to know what are the worst songs in us monkey's music collections.*

Following MeFi's lead, let's do some mix CDs of the worst music we own. Keep in mind that means that just because Bryan Adams made some really craptacular songs, unless you like Bryan Adams and own his albums you can't add that. So here's mine: Beatles - Bad Boy (something about the poop line) Stevie Wonder - I just called to say I love you Fela Kuti - Roforofo Fight (people will argue with me on this) Ernest Ranglin - Love and Happiness Serge Gainsbourg - Rock around the bunker (godamn, he did a lot of terrible music) Goran Bregovic - Gypsy Reggae (hell, the whole Arizona Dream soundtrack wasn't his best... but then again, neither was it Kusturica's) Paco de Lucia, John McLaughlin, Al di Meola - Manha de Carnaval (it's so CHEESEDICK) Bjork and Thom Yorke -I've seen it all and I'm sure I'll think of more as this thread continues... *that is really really weird grammar. i have no idea if it's even correct

  • I love that bjork and thom yorke song, even if they do sing a bunch of random lines, so it makes no sense
  • Metallica: Hmm. Where to start? Don't Tread on Me sucked dick, and not in a good way. Carter USM: Hmm. Post Historic Monsters wan't bad as such, just overproduced and lifeless. Tracks that sounded crappy there have been redone with a decent mix. Of course, I haven't really bothered with much beyond A World Without Dave. Guns and Roses: Most of Use Your Illusion onward. Knocking on Heaven's Door must rate as Worst. Dylan. Cover. Ever.
  • I think I've outgrown a lot of the music I bought when I was 16/17 years old. Some of the stuff I have in my CD cabinet that I woldn't dream of listening to anymore: 4 (count 'em) Oasis albums. Urban Hymns by the Verve (most over-rated album ever?) A lot of Placebo stuff (lame... I never wore the Brian Molko eyeliner though!) Ian Brown solo albums. I think my music tastes have matured quite a bit over the past 6-7 years. Of the bands I currently like now, I think Radiohead's Pablo Honey is really sucky, but I don't own anything really bad or embarrassing. At least I don't think so...
  • my favourite band is pavement. my least favourite song that they recorded is "Passat Dream." yeah, a spiral stairs song
  • this is the first thing that popped into my head: Dirty Monkey on Moloko's otherwise pretty great Do You Like My Tight Sweater
  • Urban Hymns by the Verve (most over-rated album ever?) I can't speak for anyone else, but I certainly don't think so. I've listened to that album hundreds of times. It used to be my security blanket, something I would listen to when I felt depressed. Personally, I think it's one of the best albums in the past ten years. But what do I know?
  • I'm pretty busy here at work, so I can only think of three: The Police - Mother Butthole Surfers - 22 Going On 23 The Pogues - Lorelei (worst song from their worst record, Peace & Love)
  • How about Stone Roses - She bangs the drums? I've always thought that to be a shitty mark on an otherwise great album. The lyrics just suck. hee hee... I just realized that I actually _do_ own a Don Ho record. I got it for free last year when I drove his old hawaiian pimp ass around Portland when he played a show here. So, technically, "Pearly Shells" would qualify on my list too. Also, his daughters are hotter than shite.
  • Worst Dylan cover GNR? Nonsense. Ever heard Billy Joel sing "Make Your Feel My Love?" He apparently has no understanding of the sadness contained in the song. He thinks that it is a I'm-happy-to-be-in-love-song. Am I the first person ever to call Billy Joel an idiot?
  • Radiohead - Morning Bell/Amnesiac (makes me feel quesy) Radiohead - The trickster Doves - M62 Song (an i'll advised foray into lead vocals by paper-thin voiced guitarist. See also: Graham Coxon) idlewild - Rusty (Horrible. Just Horrible.) Crowded House - Not the Girl You Think You Are Coldplay - High Speed (They left so many good songs off parachutes to put this drivel on) Manics - Small Black Flowers Manics - So Why So Sad? (This song left me agog when i first heard it. It just doesn't work on any level. Or am I missing something?) Urban Hymns by the Verve (most over-rated album ever?) I'm with you on this one actually. I can still remember standing in in Our Price trying to decide between Urban Hymns and OK computer. I bought Urban Hymns. It wasn't until a few years later that I finally bought OK Computer and realised what a monumental arsehead I had been. I'm still quite bitter about that, to be honest. Stupid The Verve.
  • There are a couple of songs on Outkast's The Love Below that aren't necessarily bad, but I can't listen to them in public. When "Spread" comes on, I lunge for the skip button and blush wildly. I quite liked Pablo Honey - except for "Creep". It's funny...I'm having trouble thinking of single bad songs on good albums, but I have no problem whatsoever coming up with single good songs on bad albums. And, on preview, I loved "The Trickster" - it's why I decided to check out Pablo Honey, the first Radiohead CD I happened upon, in the first place.
  • I don't know about the album but I loathed "Bittersweet Symphony" for months after it first came out - not just because it was everywhere at the time but because it was trite and overambitious. Then I saw Cruel Intentions (my Buffy mania showing) and bought the soundtrack, and it suddenly seemed...not so bad. Maybe that's because it fit well in a soundtrack seemingly aimed at angsty teens.
  • Most of my albums are fucking awesome, because I have great taste in music. I will admit to a pathological facination with bad 80s glam metal though, and am ashamed to admit that not only do I own Winger's eponymous first album, I love Reb Beach's guitar work on the song "Seventeen." Admitting that you have a problem is the first step on the road to recovery.
  • I am the_bone's complete opposite - I have awful taste in music. However, I know cow shit when I hear it. Such as on Paul Oakenfold's "Perfecto Present's Another World", when, for 2 entire tracks, there's cowbells. Not *just* cowbells, but loud, obnoxious cowbells that turn anotherwise great part of the CD to absolute crap.
  • Winger has more than one album? We're in deeper trouble than I thought.
  • I could do a whole mix tape of bad Prince songs. And chopper I _like_ spread!
  • A few "least favorite tracks" by some fave bands: They Might Be Giants- S-E-X-X-Y Ben Folds- Regrets* Queen- Body Language * actually a good song... but I find it unlistenable because the word "computer" is sung in such a way that it sounds like this: "COM-pu-ter," with the syllabic stress in the wrong place. This is a long-time pet peeve of mine, and studying vocal music has only exacerbated it. One of my least favorite songs of all time is "Hot Blooded" by the shit-tastic Foreigner. From the chorus: I'm HOT BLOOD-ed! I'm HOT blood-ED!
  • I have one that is coming to my mind:
    The Walkmen - Bows & Arrows
    Can't stand this song.
  • this is tricky as the bad songs don't stick on my head - But the 1 star rating on iTunes reveals: Pulk/Push revolving doors and Life in a Glass House off Amnesiac by Radiohead (I've got rid of Pablo Honey) You Are The Sunshine of my Life by Stevie Wonder Straight to the Man, Begging You, Tightrope and Aluminium off Second Coming by The Stone Roses (She bangs the Drums - you can't be serious - it's great!) Essex Dogs, I'm Just a Killer for Your Love and Chinese Bombs off Blur by Blur and a few others. They're all rubbish by bands who should know better. And I completely agree with criticism of Urban Hymns - I have the CD but it's never made it onto iTunes, it's pompous over-rated rubbish ... So there!
  • Off the Singles soundtrack - that Lovemongers (Heart) cover of Battle of Evermore. If you don't believe me, go listen right now...
  • Hmm. Do compilations count? If they do, then songs like the Presidents of the United States of America's "Lump" and other mid-'90s dross would be on there. Are we only counting albums that I've purchased, or ones that were given/sent to me? Garageland's "I'm Goin' Crazy" falls into the latter category. There's always Leonard Cohen's "Jazz Police" (in fact, while Cohen writes genius songs, pretty much everything he did in the '80s has terminally bad production). Or Devo's "Speed Racer." I find it easier to think of shit albums by good bands (see also: Pixies "Trompe Le Monde") than shit songs. Maybe I just skip by 'em...
  • I find it easier to think of shit albums by good bands (see also: Pixies "Trompe Le Monde") GET. THE FUCK. OUTTA HERE. YOU TROLL BASTARD!!! ;)
  • Led Zeppelin - Hats Off To (Roy) Harper (Oh so bad!) Radiohead - Like Spinning Plates (It was really good live, but the album version is AWFUL!) Bruce Springsteen - Wild Billy's Circus Story (Ruins an otherwise perfect album) The Beatles - She's Leaving Home (More syrup than Log Cabin) On Preview: Didn't like The Trickster lost_vowels? I thought it was the best track on that EP. What was it that turned you off?
  • Guns N' Roses - Look At Your Game Extreme - Cupid's Dead Bjork - Big Time Sensuality Led Zeppelin - Hot Dog Tricky - Record Companies Radiohead - Morning Bell/Amnesiac Option 30 - Time and Chance R.E.M. - Circus Envy Dead Kennedys - Buzzbomb From Pasedena The Beatles - Blue Jay Way Alice in Chains - Confusion Tori Amos - Bonnie & Clyde '97
  • Anything off the first Smiths album, anything off of Morrissey's "Kill Uncle" besides Sing Your Life and Tony the Pony and Mute Witness. Band in order of how much I like them: worst notable songs New Order: Chemical Young Offender Paradise Ultraviolence David Bowie: Anything off 'hours...' Space Oddity Karma Man Starman The supermen That annoying uppety song on Hunky Dory Rolling Stones: Cover of that sam cooke song on "out of our heads" (let the good times roll?) Can't always get what you want Mother's little helper That's how strong my love is (O. Redding cover) Otis Redding: Satisfaction (stones cover) Roxy Music: Amazona Joy Division: Ice Age Something must break Stooges: All the boring shit on first album Beatles: Long and winding turd Led Zeppelin: STAIRWAY TO FUCKING HEAVEN SHUT UP YOU DONGS Rain Song Chameleons UK: Don't Fall Queen: We are the champions medley T-Rex: Laser Love Zombies: Time of the season Animals: Sky Pilot The Who: Won't get fooled again (besides the part they use in the CSI Miami intro) Foreigner: Headgames (I love Urgent/Hot Blooded b/c they do rock but this one just blows)
  • Zombies: Time of the season I absolutely love that song. Seriously. There's something about the guy's over-egotistical attitude that just draws me to it.
  • The song is superb but compared to other Zombies songs, erghh. I am aware of the sexiness.
  • Grateful Dead: Touch of Grey....
  • On Preview: Didn't like The Trickster lost_vowels? I thought it was the best track on that EP. What was it that turned you off? That weird fuzzy guitar that comes in at about 13 seconds, primarily. I don't know. I just sounds kind of clangy and edgy and angsty, when I prefer my Radiohead etheral, beuatiful and angsty. It also seems a bit, well, confrontational. And the rhythm's a bit plodding. And so on. Each to their own and all that, though: I really like Creep. I'm kind of with you on Like Spinning Plates, however - I never really appreciated it until I heard the live version. They seem to have gone out of their way to remove any hint of emotion on the album version. Thought of another one, vaguely in the_bone's syllabic stress vein: U2 - stuck in a moment you can't get out of. I want all manner of calamities to befall Bono each and every time he sings that final 'it' in the chorus. "You're stuck in a moment, and you can't get out of it." It. Just. Doesn't. Work.
  • I really like Creep as well. Sure it's not as good as their later stuff, but it's their first album. They were still a bunch of Oxford stuffs trying to find their sound. And even if you don't like Creep, you still should find this flash animation to be dark and beautiful (via boingboing). If the server is down just try again later; lowmorale has been getting slammed lately as this .swf is making big rounds.
  • that low morale flash is wonderful, but of course I really like Creep (and I suspect some of that traffic is homunculus' doing, posting it to MeFi)
  • Am I the first person ever to call Billy Joel an idiot? No, not at all. Freedy Johnston ("Bad Reputation") is very forthcoming with the fact that he detests Billy Joel music. Apparently he used to be even more vehement about how much Billy Joel sucks, until he had an encounter with him and Billy actually helped him out of a jam in a very gallant fashion.
  • My ex's bar band used to do the most beautifully heartrending version of "Make Your Feel My Love." It's a good thing cabingirl mentioned Billy Joel's redeeming qualities, so I don't have to permanently silence him for wrecking one of my favorite musical memories. And of course, now I'm going to *have* to find the cowbell songs on "Perfecto Present's Another World". Thanks, minda25. Heh.
  • drat. must learn to spell check.
  • Yes - Owner of a Lonely Heart
  • I always like Joel's ability to tell a story in a song. Especially since the stories went ouside the usual R&R cliches. Maybe they were just more adult, in a bad boy kind of way, and kind of throwback to the days when lyrics were more important.