December 18, 2003

Curious, George: We need a new word.

We need a new word. Here at work, this happens regularly: someone comes over to you and needs to see something on your computer screen, and you have to open the program, then the file, and the person is hovering over your shoulder, waiting in an awkward silence that seems to stretch on... and that has no name. I thought perhaps some of you smart Monkeys could help fill in this lexicographic pothole.

posted by certainsome1 21 years ago
  • screenus interruptus?
  • Vultureing? Wirdgeier? (roughly german translation of Vulture-being)
  • Pentium Shuffle "So, Suzy needs to see a spreadsheet, so I open it up, but the damn machine is so slow, and the whole time she's doing some weird pentium shuffle tap dance thing behind my chair. Damn annoying in the age of e-mail attachments."
  • digiatus. (like hiatus, only digital) "John asked me to come over to his cube and watch the Paris Hilton video, but since his laptop is such a junker I ended up taking a ten minute digiatus before the thing finally fired up." (a) fart. (ever see someone fart while talking? They're blabbing away, then they just... stop, for a second, during which they float the biscuit, then take off right blabbing where they left off) "John asked me to come over to his cube and watch the Paris Hilton video, but his laptop farted for ten minutes before the thing finally fired up." sawing blogs. (from the term for sleeping, "sawing logs") "John asked me to come over to his cube and watch the Paris Hilton video, but since his laptop is such a junker it spent ten minutes sawing blogs before it finally fired up."
  • I thought perhaps some of you smart Monkeys could help fill in this lexicographic pothole. interactional pause
  • 'Vulturing' is exactly what we call it when it happens at my office. And why is it always the people with bad breath that have this awful habit?
  • Dunno about the 'awkward silence while waiting for an application to open', but my office is regrettably full of shoulder surfers and hovercraft. (i.e.: Those who derive evil pleasure from sneaking up and stealthily checking out what's up on your screen) "Can't chat right now - too many hovercraft!" or "Dammit! I finally check my email account, and there's my boss, shoulder surfing again!"
  • Lap(top) Dancing?
  • Yeah, we have the vulturers and hoverers as well (which ellicit a sing-song "Hover-innnnng... Hover-innnnng" when noticed), but I was thinking more for the specific time when you're both waiting for the suddenly slow starting Shop de Photo and you've run out of chit-chat... More awkward, I find, IgSlut are the frighteningly attractive ladies with the sexy accents (well, the one f.attract.lady) standing over my shoulder. May favorite so far is "digiatus" but find it awkward to say outloud while keeping the eye-ay-tus (instead of the eee-ay-tus that comes naturally with the "didg" sound before it)...
  • old guys caught in a digiatus need digitalis, dig?
  • Certainsome1 - I think the last is called "time to start a conversation."
  • ...as opposed to "chit-chat."
  • Uh... Screen time? I got nuffin'. One thing that's always eluded me is the name for the shape your lips make when you're unhappy. Like, the opposite of a smile. A frown is too generalised, and a pout suggests petulance. Help me out here.
  • You could of course take the Meaning of Liff approach - Douglas Adams' and John Lloyd's dictionary of things there aren't any words for yet. They use, as I'm sure many of you will be aware, place names. I therefore tentatively suggest that these shoulder-vultures are, technically, 'Ealing'.
  • Me, I'm in favor of calling it whacking, or perhaps flagellating, depending how uptight your office is on proper nomenclature. "I had to whack/flagellate the machine for ten minutes before I could see Paris, and then it turned out to be some porno. Man, my travel agents going to hear from me tomorrow."
  • from the Way Off Topic Department: from the Ealing link: "A TESCO delivery woman has beaten off stiff competition to be crowned regional driver of the year." Well, whatever it takes to get a head. I mean... uh...
  • Blaise: how about "pooching"? "After realizing the Paris mpg was of the Arc de Triomphe and not the porn I had hoped for, I pooched my lips in annoyance."
  • Apparently she "regularly delivers to elderly shoppers". "Elaine always arrives right on time and sorts out my requests straight away without any fuss. She is always so very cheerful, helpful and kind and it's a pleasure having her deliver my groceries." Heh heh. 'Deliver my groceries'. Heh. Not enough to make me move to Ealing, though. Apparently there's been a spate of "distraction thefts". And my distraction isn't even insured. We now return you to the topic.
  • "Jean-Luc was ealing behind me for about fifteen minutes while we had to check all the porn files for unwanted Parisian landmarks, a disgruntled falmouth passing across his expression at regular intervals."
  • I always hum a little tune while I'm opening the file if someone's hovering, so it's more of a musical interlude.
  • I usually hum some action soundtrack riff from a Jerry Bruckheimer-esque movie so the person feels like what they're doing is worthwhile.