July 08, 2004

• That does it. Now I shall have to visit England to view the parrots (and avoid the haunts of the woodchuck and the leopards). O, this is such beastly stuff! Thanks again, mean Uncle Nostril!
• Unca Nostwil, I am never gonna eat cuttlefish again. *reverts to thumb-sucking out of shock*
• Also in Oz, when Kangaroos attack!
• Yes, Roos can be extremely vicious, most are not that cuddly & friendly at all. Male ones in particular are quite adept at disembowelling with their hind claws, & there have been cases where this has happened to people. The ones you meet at lovely zoos & wildlife centres are usually the most gentle ones, but even they can be quite pushy and aggressive at times. That's a sad tale, Q.
• This is good. Great post man. I have my insomniac reading for the night.
• Family of a friend of mine has a few roos as "pets" - she has a big yard (as in, one side of a large hill). Only has girly roos, though. Irrelevant? Yes. Sorry.
• Thanks mean Uncle Nostril! More animal news: Buddy Bear has been released
• To those people that live in areas were the wild life is a little crazy...just buy a paintball gun, or pellet gun, or beanbag gun, or something that is enough to stun them without killing them, and have yourself a blast at the same time.
• Spoken like a WARRIOR. Me, I would not shoot a kangaroo with a paintball gun, not least 'cause I would be 'fraid that it would chase me down and kick my sorry ass.
• I've seen parakeets like those in my local park (in Surrey) but I had no idea there were so many.
• Heh hehe. I would not recommend you shoot a Kangaroo with a paintgun. Heheh. This is an animal that fights by kicking each other with it's razor sharp claws on it's super strong rear legs. You remember I mentioned the disembowelling? This is because their hide is tough; they don't disembowell each other.. only weak pathetic humans. They kick each other: merely a puff of kangaroo dust. With humans? Spew of red guk. You shoot a Roo with a paintball gun.. you have a Roo that is angry with you.. with a splash of colour. You don't want this. Trust me. He kick your fuckin ass, my frein'.
• I wonder if they're executive transvestite cuttlefish.
• Running, jumping, climbing trees...
• Transvestites? Shocking. Won't somebody think of the hatchlings? Back in the U.S.A., the city of St. Louis gets a gorilla frat house.
• I can understand the female-only roo thing working: it seems males are definitely the more aggressive of the species. It's easy to think the soft-looking cute marsupials are immune to the tribal pack-thinking of moose, wolves, lions, and other species, but it's just not true. Anyone notice how alpha males stare down human males, and all but ignore females? I'm normally taller (6'5'') than other people I'm around, and whenever I've been around kangaroos, the largest one won't take his eyes off mine. I dunno, maybe it's love.
• Because you are taller than them, you are essentially challenging the big male's dominance. This is actually true of many animal species - I would assume the bipedal or erect mammals, mostly. It's definitely true of Roos. Males will stretch very tall in dominance-fights, attempting to get their heads higher than their rival (then they grapple and kick the fuck out of each other - avoid this). :D If you really wanted to take the stare off, you would crouch lower than the dominant male and not make eyecontact. Scratch yourself. Face 3/4 away. Act nonchalant. Fly casual. I'm not entirely sure whether all other species can identify gender in humans, primates certainly can thru' odour. I assume that most mammals would automatically think the larger human individuals were males, as this is generally true in most species. This is a quite interesting subject to me.
• Addendum: Or crouch lower than the tallest male in your group. The dominant Roo will then transfer his latent aggression to that bloke. Heheh
• those are wonderful words of wisdom, nostril. i think i shall apply that advice to many situations. a good way to displace the heat to another.
• also works well in a crowded elevator.
• Nostrildamus' words also apply to the great apes, fwiw. I'm not sure about monkeys.
• It is a proven fact that offering Pop Tarts and cockpunch will diffuse Monkey tension.
• Or crouch lower than the tallest male in your group. The dominant Roo will then transfer his latent aggression to that bloke. Me, I signed up for groveling lessons today, Nostril. Double heh,and I'll raise you a ha.
• all males beware, especially if you are a fish it seems there are more strange things going on.
• A woman was left in shock after a herd of runaway cows trampled over her car.
• They talk all day and when it starts to get dark they lower their voices to converse with their own shadows and with the silence. They are like everybody, the parakeets: all day chatter and at night bad dreams. With their gold rings on their clever faces, brilliant feathers and the heart restless with speech. They are like everybody, the parakeets: the ones that talk best have separate cages. --Alberto Blance, translated by W. S. Merwin, "The Parakeets"