June 20, 2004

Call me Ishmael. Apparently Madonna has / wants to change her name to Esther, to connect to the dead biblical queen's energy. Is she serious?
posted by entertainer 19 years ago
  • The ray of light has frozen her brain.
  • Maybe she wants to go back to being like a virgin, so instead she just changes her name?
  • Well, she might have been a virgin when she was a teenager, so maybe it's nostalgia for some pagan phase where people take on names that they can't live up to. (Aw, sorry, I'm not usually that mean. Except occasionally.) On the other hand, so I care what she calls herself?
  • The only value of this story is as a jumping-off point for coming up with Biblical names other celebrities want to change to: Of course, Charleton Heston has dibs on Moses. Mel Gibson would want Job. Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson would insist on Peter (but you'd have to actually read the New Testament to get that joke). carry on...
  • You must be my lucky star...
  • I think Gibson would want Paul.
  • Or, maybe Jesus.
  • Then who gets "God" ?
  • Is there no biblical equivalent to "washed up pop star desperate to keep making records"?
  • But, then, there are the Songs of Solomen. He hasn't toured in years.
  • "Who wants God?" Only GWB knows.
  • Then who gets "God" ? Harvey Weinstein
  • Don't underestimate Madonna. Remember how nuts Prince seemed when he changed his name to that symbol? And then changed it back? Well, he actually was crazy... like a formerly-known-as-a fox! Turns out it was all about contract rights... this may also make more sense someday when an unknown contract lapses.
  • If Prince could do it, why not she?
  • Is she serious? Hardly ever. About anything.
  • I saw her kids' book in a shop today. Gack.
  • I think Gibson would want Paul. But who would get John, George and Ringo?
  • "Ishmeal" /it happens when I try to type "fishmeal"
  • I think Gibson would want Paul. But who would get John, George and Ringo? Les.
  • For the record, I have no idea what I meant. That's what you get for posting while dizzy and giddy and flushed with glory.
  • This is a noble idea. As soon as he's dead, I'm changing my name to Mike Tyson.
  • Can I be Lot? That would be awesome.
  • Wolof, that must have been it. Don't know why I thought it was funny, however.
  • This is all of a piece with the rest of her career. This is what Madonna has always been, a chamelon, someone who holds attention by perpetually morphing into a new look/phase/personae. And she's so successful at shape shifting because she has no fixed centre. However, I do dislike the idea of Madonna as a moral authority. I heard recently that Madonna wants to get involved in making "moral" movies for teenagers, which infuriated me. She has always been unapologetically and joyously amoral, and it has rewarded her richly. Frankly, it turns my stomach that she would turn preachy now (and her children's books indicate that she is tending that way).
  • I enjoy snarking about Madonna as much as the next gal, but selecting a Jewish name when you convert is standard practice. My mother did it and it carries a lot of religious significance with it. Now, I don't know if she converted, and my mother chose her Jewish name but still goes by her birth name so I'm not entirely sure what's up with Madonna. However, I think this has more to do with her religious practice and less of a publicity stunt than people are giving her credit for. And also, her moralistic children's books and that whole moral movies for teenagers idea really, really bugs. It's completely hypocritical and highly annoying. How will she explain the disparity to her children? "Mommy ran around taking her clothes off and masturbating on stage and doing things to shock and upset people and break societal rules, but you should be good and moral." She needs to chill and just step back from the public eye for a while.