June 09, 2004

Curious George: Action Movie Villains Okay, no link (....yet!), but I figured this was right up the monkeys' collective banana peel-strewn alley... A friend of mine was at a restaurant with his groovy wife and they saw someone who some folks know as the dad from That 70s Show, but the rest of us know as Clarence Boddicker. This inspired his rating muse, read on...

"We did not bother Mr. Smith during his dinner (he had pasta, alone). But seeing [Kurtwood Smith] in person (he was very nice to the wait staff) got me thinking about how I always thought his character from RoboCop was one of the top ten coolest action/adventure movie villains. But yesterday I found out that I was wrong. Because yesterday I finally sat down and did my top ten list of coolest action/adventure movie villains, and it turns out that Clarence Boddiker is #11! Since I know you all have nothing better to do, and can't wait any longer, here is my Top Ten List (+1) of Coolest Action/Adventure Movie Villains: 1. Darth Vader (a no-brainer!) 2. Hans Gruber (Alan Rickman) from Die Hard (so cool he's almost #1!) 3. The Terminator from the (1st) movie of the same name 4. Norman Stansfield (Gary Oldman) from The Professional 5. Agent Smith from The Matrix (he might've been higher if the last movie hadn't been such a let-down) 6. Top Dollar (Michael Wincott) from The Crow 7. T-1000 (Robert Patrick) from T2 8. The Kurgan (Clancy Brown) from Highlander 9. Bill (David Carradine) from Kill Bill: Vol. 2 10. Roy Batty (Rutger Hauer) from Blade Runner 11. Clarence Boddiker (Kurtwood Smith) from RoboCop Obviously, not all of you are going to agree with this list, and it's always possible that I forgot some cool villain from some movie, so I invite you all to respond with any criticisms and/or comments about the list (other than how stupid it all is, I'm already well aware of that). Please note, that this is for action/adventure movie villains only. No horror movies (so no Freddy or Jason), and no thriller/drama movies (so no Hannibal Lector, no Denzel Washington from Training Day, no Gary Sinise from Ransom)." All righty monkeys? I've promised him a full rundown of our musings.

posted by BearGuy 20 years ago
  • The Bad - (Lee van Cleef) from "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly"
  • Ooo, that's good. Er, that's so Bad it's Good--er, bad. Never mind... Honestly, one of the problems I have thinking about the list is his definition of action-adventure films. Obviously not all "genre" films are out because he has overt sci-fi villains--but horror villains are out. It might help to check out AFI's top 100 Heroes and Villains just to further get the wheels churning. (Hey, I said I'd come up with a link--or at least insinuated it).
  • Bucho - (Joaquim de Almeida) from Desparado Ned Trent - (James Woods) from The Specialist awful, awful movie except for Wood's performance IMO Johnny Wong - (Anthony Wong Chau-Sang) from Hard Boiled (on preview, good link)
  • If you're including 2 terminators, then I'm counting the scary monsters from Aliens.
  • He's not a villian per se, but Jean Reno as Victor the Cleaner in La Femme Nikita is in my top 5 all time cool characters. Also, you put Roy Batty far too low.
  • kaiser soze!
  • Fine list, but a couple I would have had on mine: Robert Mitchum as Max Cady in Cape Fear. #1, no question in my mind. His performance was just amazing, and is my favorite villian from film. Wait. This thread is almost 10 comments old and no one has mentioned Kaiser Soze yet? The mind boggles. And no "Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!"? Martin Sheen in Truth or Consequences, NM. Very cool villian, who, much like Michael Madsen's character in Resevoir Dogs, turns a classic song on their ear. Not sure if any of those would be considered out of bounds for this list, but they are the ones that popped into my mind when reading.
  • on its ear. on its.
  • Gary Oldman as um...Mr. Zorg (?) in The Fifth Element...so zany, so villainous...
  • Gary Oldman as um...Mr. Zorg (?) in The Fifth Element...so zany, so villainous...
  • John Lithgow as Lord John Whorfin in one of the greatest movies of all time, The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai: Across the 8th Dimension. Not the last alien he'd play, but definitely the funniest. And while I do agree that Keyser Soze is an awesome villain in concept... he doesn't exist. =)
  • Yes, definitely: Khan Noonian Singh But he's more anti-hero than villian...
  • Also Gary Oldman in Air Force One, Sam Neill in Event Horizon (technically a horror, however), Peter Stormare/James Gandolfini in 8MM, James Hong as Lo Pan in Big Trouble in Little China, Robert de Niro as Al Capone in The Untouchables, Russell Crow in Romper Stomper, and The hicks from Deliverance
  • Ah, Buckaroo Banzai. On first viewing, my buddy demanded "they'd better tell us later what that watermellon is for."
  • shawnj, *i* mentioned kaiser soze! right above you!!! sniff. no one reads my posts.
  • Oooooh, and Christopher Walken as the Archangel Gabriel in the first couple of editions of the Prophecy series. " wio Mortensen did a nice cameo as Lucifer in the first one as well.
  • The monkey, she wigs... that should have been Viggo, not, "wio".
  • Daniel Day-Lewis in Gangs of New York
  • I read your post SideDish. But I must break into the conversation with an unabashed guy moment embodied by this site. It is a thing of beauty. I don't feel Khan should be in the top ten, but for wack-ass Internet sites, maybe that one should be.
  • "Any falsehood triggers a brutal charge to your... [smirk] auditory meatus."
  • I should also mention that the guy who concocted this list and I in college used to quote Aliens and Ghostbusters all the time, but nowadays, I keep on quoting Khan (not Khaaaan, mind you). Hmm. I think Khan would be in my top 20. I'll go to work on that. Or maybe I should do work.
  • Well, if you're gonna talk Aliens. Carter Burke. Take off and nuke the thread from orbit, it's the only way to be sure...
  • Mr. Blonde
  • Telly Savalas/Donald Pleasance/etc as the ubiquitous Ernst Stavro Blofeld. "Goodbye, Mr. Bond!"
  • THE GRINCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • How can you people forget Merv Griffin as the serial killer in The Man With Two Brains? Flings monkey poo at all of you!
  • With you on Ned Trent, blogRot. And I'm afraid I find Gary Oldman just way too much of a scenery chewer; he ends up irrirtating me or just being amatuerish. James Wood's performance in the specialist is what Oldman should have been in The Professional. Vincenzo Coccotti (Chistopher Walken) in True Romance rates for me.
  • Shawnj: I'll see your Max Cady and I'll raise you a Rev. Harry Powell (Night of the Hunter is maybe not strictly speaking an action picture, but I think it fits nicely. And the good reverend is pretty much as bad a guy as has been captured on film.) How about everyones favorite hubristic archaologist, Dr. Rene Belloq, from Raiders of the Lost Ark? I also second the votes for both the Aliens and Carter Burke.
  • Conitnuing the Rutger Hauer thread, I always thought he was great as the John Ryder in The Hitcher. One of my favorite movies when I was growing up. And let's not forget about Gene Simmons as terroriste supreme Malak Al Rahim in Wanted: Dead or Alive. And yes, they did use that crappy Bon Jovi song over the closing credits
  • Bob Barker as Bob Barker in Happy Gilmour. "The price is wrong, bitch!" Yeah, that's silly...
  • Sting (wearing mousse in the hair and oil on the bod) as Feyd-Rautha in the David Lynch Dune adaptation.
  • Have to second f8xmulders mention of the guys from Deliverance. Particularly scary is Billy Redden the banjo player. Recently seen in Big Fish. And a duelling banjo just for the hell of it!
  • And yes, they did use that crappy Bon Jovi song over the closing credits And a good Bon Jovi song would be ...
  • Sting (wearing mousse in the hair and oil on the bod) as Feyd-Rautha in the David Lynch Dune adaptation. Goetter, surely you kid. Pleeeeease tell me you kid.
  • Zod from Superman. (And now that I think about it, Neal from the same film -- because you gotta put Neal before Zod.)
  • Robert Loggia in Lost Highway also, Robert Blake (is that his name?) in Lost Highway Toshiro Mifune in Rashomon (if that counts)
  • Sting wasn't that bad. He had Feyd's arrogance down pretty well. (Oh, and I second the reference to The Hitcher. That's one of those great gems you only find when you blow the dust off of it at the video store.)
  • I thought The Hitcher was considered a classic?
  • Anthony Hopkins as Hannibal Lector. I know it's not really an action movie per se, but damn if he wasn't the best bad guy I've ever seen on film.
  • I loved Vernon Wells as Wez in The Road Warrior. Wez and Max had a growing hatred for each other and they were alter egos. They were the two most lethal killer that served tribal leaders (Max handcuffed and Wez chained to the tractor.)
  • From my all-time favorite under-appreciated '60s movie: "The President's Analyst": Pat "Schnieder" Harrington as Arlington Hewes, President of The Phone Company (which in this movie was much more an evil empire than the U.S.S.R.), who, in one of the funniest sci-fi twists ever, turned out to be a Disneyland-style animatronic robot. (Take THAT, Schwartzenninny...)
  • surely you kid Just Sting, Sully. He had a sulky "I'd rather be strangling kittens, Uncle" expression that I thought fit Feyd very well. Certainly not the rest of that steaming coil of a flick.
  • Plus Sting had that groovy galactic underwear. I loved Jonathan Rhys Meyers as Steerpike in Gormenghast. But I suppose he's also more of an anti-hero than a villain.
  • Sullivan: I will kill you! * dances a harkonnen jig, waving a knife from hand to hand. Well, maybe a little silly, fine. How about the creepy little girl, instead?
  • Don Logan from Sexy Beast.
  • Oops, it's not an action movie. But he's pretty damn scary.
  • I would have found Sting more scary in Dune if he sang some songs from his last solo album.
  • oh oh - I was in line for concert tickets behind Alan Rickman a few weeks ago my my eyes just popped! as I tried to calmly instruct my sheltered friend (she's from Minnesota, what can you do)(I kid!) as to the emminence before us. I was absolutely getting laughed at by those around us for my reaction but! but! It's the Sheriff of Nottingham!! It's Hans Gruber! [also Rasputin and Col. Brandon, but that's less relevant to this thread]
  • Not all Minnesotans are sheltered. ;) Lucky monkey, ilyadeux! I love Alan Rickman. He does play a good villain, but is also a wonderful romantic lead. Col. Brandon, or Jamie in Truly, Madly, Deeply... Makes me weak at the knees. *sigh*
  • Not an action movie, but no-one's mentioned the dude from Se7en. He creeped me out. Did he have a name?
  • ilyadeux, its also Professor Snape, no mean villain himself!!
  • its he's
  • Did he have a name? John Doe. Not the villian real name but symbolicaly enough.
  • Right. I totally agree on anything where Alan Rickman plays a villain. He's soooo dreamy. /fangirl mode I'm also down with the bad guy from Mad Max -- although I wonder to this day why Americans know that movie as The Road Warrior (maybe just because I was only wee when it came out, and it's my mistake). And the bad guy from Highlander which is one of my favourite movies. And Prince Humperdink from The Princess Bride. And I admit that I have never looked at Red from That 70s Show as anyone but Boddiker. And Zorg from Fifth Element. Does Sean Bean as Boromir count? Ugh, looking at this list makes me feel like a flaky teenager. Please note that there is no Harry Potter on this list. Oh, oh! Bennett in Commando!
  • This could count for an action movie since there are people constantly running around and shooting each other. Sergeant Barnes in Platoon is one scary and badass mofo.
  • The Predator Damnit! The Predator!!! Best action villian ev4r!! Whoever can kick Schwarzenegger-in-commando-mode's ass deserves that title Oh! and: Matrix: Remember, Sully, when I promised to kill you last? Sully: That's right, Matrix. You did. Matrix: I lied. Best. Lines. Ever!
  • *rents video, cooks popcorn, invites Zemat over*
  • Bru Swillis in "The Jackal". He was actually pretty badass in that.
  • trac rents video Ohh, I wish I knew. I brought it...
  • I used to have it recorded off TV -- or rather my Dad did, from about 1988. I didn't realise until last year that there was swearing in "Commando" because I'd only ever seen the TV-friendly version. Last year they showed it on late TV and there was a scene with the following deep dialogue: Green Beret: F*** you, asshole. Arnold: No, f*** you, asshole. I was speechless.
  • Just about the entire cast of Dr Strangelove, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb.
  • trac, Commando dialogs sound even more cornyish dubbed in spanish, filled with bad translations, chopped puns, over-the-top voice acting. A must see!
  • By the way, I just saw Predator dubbed in a quite dull french. Surreal experience.
  • Dr. Evil, anyone? Heh... And Zorg gets my vote, too. And whatsisname from "The Long Kiss Goodnight."
  • Windom Earle from Twin Peaks. And Bob, obviously.
  • You want surreal? Watch Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey dubbed into Japanese on a flight from New York to Tokyo. Changed my life.
  • LeFours in Mallrats!
  • Return of the King in German seemed very appropriate...
  • Because of this thread, I am inspired to nominate the Evil Midnight Bomber What Bombs At Midnight. With extra 'nanners for Koko. Koko good.
  • I'm a big fan of Auric Goldfinger, for this exchange alone: James Bond: Do you expect me to talk? Auric Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die. Dr. Christian Szell is a pretty bad fella and SSgt. Bob Barnes is evil to the core.