June 04, 2004

Curious, George: Help me find a job! I'm turning to the Monkey community with a very special request: Please help me fix my resume so I can escape this God forsaken job while I still have a few shreds of my soul, decency, and dignity left.

I know almost everyone would describe themselves as underworked and overpaid overworked and underpaid, not to mention completely unappreciated. Well, I for one have decided to move on (well, decided to finally get my lazy ass around to actually doing something about moving on) and am looking to you for help. There is a position I need to apply for tomorrow, and after several revisions and iterations, my resume has mutated into, well, junk. I'm looking for feedback, constructive criticism, etc, especially from anyone who is experienced with HR in general or familiar with job seeking in the IT field. And even should things not pan out for tomorrow's application, this is really a long term step I've been needing to get around to for a while anyway. Anyway, I can't really post it in here, for space and privacy concerns but mostly just because it's got wacky Word formatting, but if anyone is gracious enough to care to assist me I would be happy to email you what I've got. save me, please

  • Anonymize it and post it here (John Doe for your name, Podunk State for your univ...etc).
  • There is a position I need to apply for tomorrow a long term step I've been needing to get around to for a while anyway InfraMonkey: I'm thinkin' you might have waited a tad late to start polishing up the ol' resume to apply TOMORROW! Other Monkeys: put out your bets. I'm thinking our Infra is ..........hmmmm........23 years of age? Ah, youth.
  • Cut 'im ope an' count tha rings.
  • Inframonkey, I'm pretty good at punching up resumes, but it isn't a 5 minute effort. I could probably work with you to put one together that would get you interiews, but I'd need a lot of information from you to do so. If you'd like me to try, my email address is in my profile. On the other hand, good resumes only work with good interviews. I might also be able to give you some advice on that, depending on your area of expertise. So, impress them tomorrow, but if you don't get an offer you can get in touch with me.
  • I second path. I can help you with the layout as well. I'm pretty ok with working on Word, and I can ether send it back to you as Word, or change it to PDF so's the layout stays consistent. I can do proofreading and stuff, but I think path would be the better advisor.
  • Ok in my defense, a)I didn't just start thinking about polishing up my resume, I only just thought about getting you guys to do it for me. See, my brilliance speaks for itself :). In all seriousness, I have been working on it, just have decided that it wouldn't be a bad idea to fix up my resume, and, well, if I can have a better resume for the application I'm sending in tomorrow, then all the better. Without further ado (but with apologigies for delay and possible formatting issues):
  • Inframonkey 123 Yemen St, Yemen (800) 555-2355 ojh2@columbia.edu OBJECTIVE I am seeking a challenging position with growth opportunity as an Information Technology support technician. EDUCATION Podunk University, School of Engineering, New York, NY BS in Computer Engineering , GPA: 3.14 May 2001
  • And for the record, I'm a 43 year old trapped in the mind of a 12 year old, who just happens to have been on the planet long enough to accrue 26 rings in the ol' trunk
  • Resume Schmemuze, You'll need a stellar cover letter: To get one, a good trick I've found is to search out 5 or 6 jobs that REALLY interest you (and that you're qualified for) and paste them all into one big document. Then start deleting all the extraneous words in that doc until you've whittled it down to the key phrases and buzz words that really define the job and resonate. Plug in your qualifications and its a go. I agree with others in the thread, the interview will land you the job.
  • Use your instincts, be aware of your posture. Speak positives not negatives. Be clear, be direct, convey confidence without being overbearing. Maintain a sense of humor (keep it pc). Your look; polished, well put togethor (light on the cologne/perfume), relaxed yet sophisticated (which does not necessarily mean you have to spend a lot of money to achieve said effect). Don't fidget! Make sure your fingernails are nicely cleaned up (I'm guessing your male??). Speak up, don't talk in monotones. Yeah, I can't think of anything else right now. But I certainly wish you the very best in your interview. Please keep us updated as to how it goes. Do well!:)
  • Make sure you have eye contact with the interviewer(s). If there are more than one, make sure you give each one a certain amount of attention each. No need to obssess about giving each exactly the same level of attention, just don't inadvertently ignore anyone. Watch your shoulders. They're a subtle and often-ignored part of your posture. Not too high (nervous) or too low (despondent). Pull them back a bit, it'll make you look confident. /2 cents
  • I've always looked forward to the day I can write my resume, simply so that I can put in the "strengths" section "CAN MAKE A NOISE LIKE A DUCK".
  • And for the love of god, if you have one of those dead fish handshakes, do something about it! Find a friend to practice with until you have a firm, but not too tight grip. Having interviewed a number of folks over the years, I can't stress how important the handshake is.
  • balloon. hand the interviewer a balloon.
  • While I appreciate and hope to one day get to utilize the interviewing advice, I really don't seem to be able to even land the interviews, which is what has brought me to the point of retooling it. I didn't think there was anything too bad about it (I didn't misspell "computer" or anything, did I?), but no one comes a-calling.
  • One great trick I learned was to mimic the posture and speech of the interviewer. It sounds really stupid, and of course you don't want to play the "mirror" game, but it actually works. If he crosses his legs and leans back when he sits down, cross your legs and lean back. If she sits up straight and folds her hands in her lap, do the same. If their voices are soft and even, speak the same way. You get the picture. I think the idea is you want them to subconsciously identify with you -- that way they'll be more inclined to like you.
  • OK, jumping in here (and you've probably heard all this privately by email by now) but... ...a resume should be tailored to a job. Just like a cover letter, one resume, one job. Which means that I should get a pretty good idea, just from looking at your resume, of _exactly_ what job you are going for. In this case, I don't. Which means that, unless your cover letter is killer, you are asking me, potential interviewer and employer, to wade through your background _looking_ for the bits that interest me. You really really really want to rub my nose in it, that you are everything I've been looking for in an Information Technology support technician. For my particular job. So, for instance, who is this going to? Have you spoken to them? Who will review it? Have you spoken to _them_? What are they like? Will you put their teeth on edge by describing yourself as an I.T.s.t. rather than a sysadmin (ie how old school, or not, are they?) Indeed, what sort of job environment will it be? For instance, if you will be sysadminning, is it a UNIX or a Windows environment? Hey if it's UNIX, then what's your UNIX ability doing coming so far down the list? And so on, and so on. Hope this helps.
  • InfraMonkey- Are you including customized cover letters everytime you send out a resume? It can make a big difference. Although I went through streak where I sent out about 60 resumes with cover letters and only got four interviews and no job offers. A year later I sent out four resumes, got three interviews and two job offers. The job market is a fickle bastard.
  • I've found it works to use one resume which lists skills and accomplishments and a customized cover letter that points out (succinctly) how the stuff in the resume exactly meets the job requirements. It helps if the ad you're replying to actually lists the requirements.
  • Path- That's what I do, but my skillset is kinda small, and localised to a particular field. In this case, we are dealing with someone who has a wide range of abilities, and a tight focus might serve them much better.
  • I do send out the customized cover letters, but have also gotten advice along the lines of a cover letter being a waste of time. "What can you say in a cover letter that you can't say in a resume?" they exclaim. Despite this, I do still use a ceover letter, and try to customize both the letter and the resume for the specific job. In this case, the resume has already been somewhat localized to the job posting in question, I feel like the only thing I could do to narrow the focus would be something like excluding several of the skills that aren't pertinent to the job, and I wasn't sure if that would be a positive move (diversity and broad experience is a stregth I like to play to in applications/inteviews...perhaps it's not the best idea)
  • For instance, let's say that I'm Inframonkey, going for a job supporting PC users in a Windows environment. In that case I'd try a resume like this. (snip address) Objective: seeking challenging position with direct contact with users (snip education) Proficient in: Windows 3.x/9x/NT/2k/XP Office McAfee Help Desk/DPU Tivoli Service Desk/eESM MS Exchange MS Project Visual Basic Extensive knowledge of: Red Hat Linux (so, maybe this company is thinking of migrating sometime soon? Very trendy to at least be thinking about it.) UNIX (Solaris, HPUX) Norton Ghost PC Tech Support Analyst July 2002�Present Initech Boulder, CO �CSR, July 2002-November 2002 This was a mixed OS environment support position. I was the single point of contact within Bigtech corporation for all issues including troubleshooting, problem determination, assignment to support group, and confirmation of resolution. Issues supported include: PC legacy, OS, and shrinkwrap software, network (LAN/WAN connectivity, DHCP, DNS) troubleshooting, account administration including creation, modification, and password resets. Infrastructure Support focal, November 2002-February 2004 In this position I planned, coordinated, and led a team (how many people?) responsible for upgrading RAM and hard drives on over 150 machines, followed by an upgrade of all systems from Windows NT 4 to Windows 2000. (how much/little downtime? Did you meet/exceed expectations and requirements for cost, reliability etc.) This required the planning, development and deployment of PC images on several different models of hardware. (what else? eg meetings with stakeholders, conferences, training? If you are going to be working for a company, with direct people contact, show 'em you've got people skills.) During this time I was also the focal point for network, telephony, sever and application issues for the account (which account?). Also coordinated and executed several special projects, including: System inventory/Asset management: Inventoried, catalogued and organized serial numbers and hardware specifications for all equipment in the call center. (which did what? What was the outcome ie. as a result, what ran better, functioned more smoothly, saved money etc etc) Remote employee pilot program: Solely responsible for implementing technology solutions to enable 15 employees to perform call center duties from home offices, as well as offering ongoing support for technical issues. Devised and deployed agents with solution combining VoIP, VPN, Citrix, MS Terminal Server and IBM Desktop On Call to gain access to all network tools needed to perform their job from home. (again, was the outcome reduced costs, employee satisfaction, etc etc.) That's as far as I've gotten, but you get the idea.
  • I don't know about anyone else but in my experience, as someone who has reviewed a lot of resumes, a cover letter is good only if it is a) interesting, b) pertinent to job in question, c) telling me something I would not find in the resume but I would likely want to know. Also, I do not want more than two pages to look at, if at all possible. It is not necessary to list everything. Don't list the obvious skills, meaning the basic ones that most would have given your past jobs. And you may want to save a little information for the job interview, shows you have more up your sleeve. It is very difficult to purge information from a resume, but important to allow the resume to have a nice flow to it. You want your reader to be able to get through it remembering what they just read. Less is always better, really. Choose carefully, keep it interesting. Make sure you use a good font that is easy to read, I like Verdana myself. Keep the size easy to read, too. Basically a two page resume is good, with a SHORT cover letter, say a third of a page. Well, again good luck with your hunt.
  • "What can you say in a cover letter that you can't say in a resume?" You can show that you have mastery of the english language and good communication skills. You can also show that you took time to do a little research on the company. But Darshon is right, keep it short.
  • getting you guys to do it for me And for the record, I'm a 43 year old trapped in the mind of a 12 year old, who just happens to have been on the planet long enough to accrue 26 rings in the ol' trunk* Well, THAT explains it! I second the tailored cover letter idea with a (slightly modified) generic resume. DON'T forget to change the objective on the resume to reflect the job. The objective should indicate something specific--looking for a growth position, challenging opportunity, blah blah blah doesn't say anything to me. How many times do you see looking for stagnant boring McJob? Cover letters introduce you and expand on what you could do for/strengths you bring to the company. Resumes detail your skills and background to support the letter. preview: Path & Kimdog Contrary to Path (and I'm prolly wrong) I don't like ANY of this listing stuff-- Proficient in: Familiar with: Extensive knowledge of: That leaves me with the question of how YOU define proficient, familiar, extensive. Read the book? Had it on the hard drive? Actually opened the program? /sarcasm Detail me some facts, baby. X years experience using Y to produce Z, perhaps? If you must have a list, could you put it at the bottom and define your terms a bit? Good luck. Fer what it's worth I'm only a Monkey with an opinion (and I get paid by the State to babysit.) IMN an HRO. /disclaimer *I certainly hope you did your Monkey duty and cross posted to the age thread! Monkeys mine, those of you who haven't posted--fill us in, we want to know!
  • Yout! *clinks shot glasses with BlueHorse*
  • Here's my resume which has landed me impossibly cool interviews since I wrote it. I don't think it would work for everyone, but this is just to show that you don't need to sound the same as everyone else - or pick up on their buzzwords - to succeed. Sometimes it's a matter of being different, of standing out. I tried to make my resume ME. I ended up with cool interviews (and in a week may have a very cool job!) and interviewers who already had a feel for my style. [name/address/phone number data Objective: To exercise my creative muscle in a team environment where people aren
  • My newest cover letter also ends with the following paragraph: The biggest reason you should hire me, though, is simple. I'll work for peanuts. I've been working temporary positions so long that I've forgotten what it's like to remember a co-worker's name. I don't care how low the salary goes. I want to write again. All I want is to write, edit and pay my rent
  • Oh, oops. I ended up including a town name. Oh well. Y'all don't stalk me now, you hear?
  • Musing, I'd interview you in a heartbeat and I'm only next door to the HR.
  • I just figure, HR people get bored of seeing the same buzzword-filled cover letter and resume day in and day out. If I can make them laugh, that's half the battle. But then, I'm 20 years old so I get to say shit like that. Oh, and I did accidentally fuck up a date while editing stuff out. the last one was 98-2000.
  • musing! hey! i started out in [podunk paper], [podunk town], IL, too! whaddya know. made $165 a week, BEFORE taxes. heh.
  • People! "Objective" is so 1990. We're supposed to use "Summary" and do a little polite bragging about achievements and those sterling qualities which make us vital resources contributing to the success of the company, but don't shine out from the list of duties and responsibilities. Besides, "Objective" always boils down to "I want a job." And they know that!
  • Hey, I like my objective!
  • Yes, Mel, I like your Objective, too. Except, since we're criteeking re-sue-mes, IMHO adding: Knows everyone
  • Well, it's off, wish me luck. Much thanks to the Monkey Faithful, and a round of banana daiquiris on me if this job comes through
  • Musing: If you lived in New Zealand, my wife could find a bunch of prospective employment for you. Hell, she'd probably hire you herself.
  • Haha, I'd love to get out of this country but it's awfully hard without a job waiting. ;-) So maybe if she found me work I could move to New Zealand!
  • musing, are you in madison??
  • Musing - I love your objective, but it probably wouldn't work for someone working up to IT executivism. And, don't take me wrong on this, but it probably wouldn't work for someone wanting to move up into writing executivism. I think you'll have to lose it sometime since it kind of stereotypes you as an administrative assistant (unless that's where you want to be.) On the other hand, your resume is really fun to read (lots of personality and energy), and I'm sure it speaks to your targets, so what do I know? The lesson for the day is, "tailor your resume to the personalities who inhabit your profession."
  • Path: I'm sure you're absolutely 100% spot-on correctamundo in what you say. But there's something really horrible and soul draining and terrifyingly corporate oriented in your statements. If I would ever apply to work in a place where the HRO would use the term "executivism" with a straight face, I'd have to address the cover letter to ZOMBIE INHABITANTS. Under Summary: I wanna be CEO and Queen of the Undead.
  • Wedge: No, I moved to Vegas. path: Actually, combined with the cover letter, the impression I've seen people get is the correct one - "writer who has 5 years of experience and recently got stuck in shitty jobs that have nothing to do with writing." Since that's hardly uncommon in the industry, it does a good job. :) Once I have more experience and don't have to explain away my time making coffee so much, it'll look more "traditional."
  • Bluehorse - "executivism" was coined by me. Thought it would be amusing. Guess not.
  • I liked it path. :) That's what a resume is about anyway - it's like a reference letter - they're all really weird until you get comfortable with the fact that they're all like that.
  • Path: The termis amusing. That lifestyle doesn't seem like it would be.
  • P.S: I got a job!!!!!!
  • Yay! *throws confetti* Without going into too much detail what job did you get?
  • You got a job because you deserve it. I hope you love it.
  • Pls ignore previous post. Am suffering a bit from sleep deprivation, and didn't notice the hyperlink.... D'oh! /Homer Simpson
  • Yay, InfraMonkey! Great news! Alnedra, have you moved yet?
  • Flying on 21st Sept (Singapore time), arriving in Loughborough 22nd Sept afternoon (UK time). Once I'm settled in, I'll callout for a meetup! Yay! *throws more confetti*
  • Am suffering a bit fromn sleep deprivation... Then you have a dachshund, too!