May 26, 2004

• Contains no Chihuahua juices.
• LAY AN EGG MACARENA EAT A BIG MAC MAKE A SANDWICH huh, nuttin's working here, either. Why must you torment me with these non-subservient sites. Of course, we've hit the ground running.
• Wow, I damn sorry I missed out on that thread. Okay, here goes: Worth every minute of the nasty poop you'll have tomorrow. Building the Wall of Jericho in your carotid. See? Goat meat is tasty. In no way kosher. Our Mexican food contains no actual Mexicans. Because it's 2 a.m.
• Oh, and Pepsi Blue. Score!
• You have just been poisoned. To which the obvious antidote is : A chalupa. A taco. A burrito supreme. An enchirito. A tostada. A bean burrito. A.... *urp*
• got e.coli?
• OK, let's quantify 5 billion packets of sauce, assuming the published 7 g a piece. Calculated weight: 38,500 tons. Weight of Royal Princess: 45,000 tons. That's a lot of damn hot sauce.
• "If Taco Bell is mexican food, then I'm fucking Panhco Villa"
• Murnau filmed Nosferatu in 1921. What has happened since?
• Yes its a bean We wouldn't feed you swill But that doesn't mean You won't get ill
• Fit for human consumption.
• You must be Chinese the way you duck sauce.
• are there really people who would want a year's worth of their food? yech! i ate there twice. the first time was so bad that i had to try again to see if it was really that awful. it was...imho.
• The Sauce of all our Problems.
• Who knew dog food tasted so good? Caution: Not authentic mexican food! Taco Bell: Make a run for the toilet. Nearly insect free. Thats not chicken. We support minimum wage to pass the savings on to you! Try this sauce with our other fine products: pizza, kfc, pepsi. No real beef=no mad cow. Taco Bell: Bringing authentic mexican culture in the form of mexican pizza, mexi-nuggets, and cinnamin twists. That being said, I wish they would build one in tokyo.
• lkc, Pepsi no longer owns Taco Bell, Pizza Hut and KFC; they were spun off to become Yum! Brands (their !, not mine), which also includes A&W Drive-Ins (but not the Root Beer bottling) and Long John Silver's Fish & Chips (I'd rather write messages for their Malt Vinegar packs). I do kind of like their "Use your stomach, nacho mind" message, and will probably make a real submission to the contest, then, if I win a year's supply of Taco Bell food, I'll star in the sequel to "Super Size Me". I've got it all planned.
• Ah, really? I was going to say Yum! foods, but that resonated as something else and didnt want to look it up, but I thought Yum! owned pepsi, which owned that and do-fri-to-lays or something. It is encouraging that A&W is still around, even if its just the one in Mentone.
• Oh, and filthy hit "Supersize Me" right on the head, if you ask me.
• Okay, I've given them: "Mild Sauce. Gringo for it." "Powerful stuff, but not reccommended as a fuel additive" "Don't call it Mild Hot Sauce. And don't call them Jumbo Shrimp either." "Goes well on everything we serve - except Pepsi." "Sauce is good on everything - empty packets not good on sidewalk" "4 out of 5 dentists open these packets with their teeth" Call me a commerical whore, I just enjoy the writing exercise...
• "Hot or not? Visit ratemyhotsauce.com"
• *claps one hand to forehead* And pity 'tis, 'tis true! All my words of wisdom can be fitted onto a sauce packet! All told, I think there were three. Perhaps four. Got them in a fortune cookie.
• *The term "left-of-center" is NOT meant to be political in any way. It's simply a way of describing the Taco Bell brand personality and how we think differently about everything we do. It embraces our theme "Think Outside the Bun." Please. Die.
• Warning: Packet Indigestible
• We grind our meat really fine so you can't tell it's all offal and cartlidge. Has anyone ever eaten at Taco Bell while they were sober?
• I'M LOVIN' IT
• *raises hand reluctantly* although I did wish I were dead drunk. Or dead. And here, we have an unholy conglomerate of KFC/Pizza Hut/Taco Bell franchises. Yeah, outlets where you can order stuff from any of the three brands. You should see the number of young children running in and out of those outlets.
• waraw: BWHAAA HA HA!!! good one!
• Oh! This is like the Chinese fortune cookie message, where you add "in bed" to the end. At Taco Bell, you add "in the bathroom."
• lkc : You know, I live real close to filthy, and my dad usta drink at the Arvada Tavern. I occasionally think about hiding out near the German Bakery or the Army-Navy surplus shop and jumping him. Not because I hate him, but because he'd turn it into a great, colorful anecdote.
• Mickey, I didn't realise other people did that too. :)
• Mickey, that's good! I hear there's enough soy filler in their food that the "meat" is essentially vegetarian. I'm not tempted to try it, though.
• "Don't it make your brown eye red?" Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
• *Sends Melinika out to the shed* Dear God, Mel, I think we have a winner. Heh. Brown Eye. Heh.