Rassemblement de Weird Animal News - Within this post, Mean Uncle Nostril rudely collates angry lumps of spiteful animal weirdness to offensively violate copyright restrictions & convince you that Mother Nature truly is a bitch, via naughty words and invective. The theme: Animals Attack!!

Yellow Jackets are communal wasps known to build large hives, but rarely comparable in size to a friggin' minivan within an abandoned mobile home in Florida containing 200,000 of the evil little bastards. Such events frighten trailerpark-dwelling rednecks and make things generally irritating for the rest of us, if only for the time it takes to read this post. Obviously jealous of the attention, rabid bats have recently entered people's homes attempting to beat the 200,000 mark, but didn't get as far (only 3); however they are rather more scary, so perhaps that counts. Llamas are not quite as scary as rabid bats (unless you have a phobia for mucus) but in Colorado they gang up & intimidate hikers via use of sarcasm & spittle. Pigeons, though filthy, are small & not scary in the least, but during WWII the British thought about attaching bombs to them and sending them to Germany. Quote: "Pigeon research will not stand still; if we do not experiment, other powers will." I am so glad Saddam Hussein didn't think of this, aren't you? To finish: a Finnish (ok, Swedish) zoo elephant enacted his rage against his imprisonment by demolishing the symbolic foundation of all human civilization - some kid's toy bicycle. Salut!