March 23, 2012

Tug of Real War: If hostilities ever break out between the U.S. and Canada, this is how they will probably play out.
posted by oneswellfoop 12 years ago
  • Ah, if only all border disputes could be settled this way. It would be worth seeing Kim Jong-Un mounted on his rainbow unicorn at the 38th parallel.
  • I think two salamanders with their tails tied together would pull as well. No tactical thinking at all. I expected one to give the other a false message, jump aside and pull his oppenent off balance sideways, then drag him to the line like a baby on its back... But no. I guess they train all of them to keep their boots on the ground, no questions asked.
  • I'm betting the Canadians will win if they fill their boots with poutine first.
  • Depending on where the American competitors are from, they could easily counter the poutine with boots full of Wisconsin Cheese Curds, Texas Chili, Chicago Pizza, or Kentucky Fried Chicken's Double Down.