October 15, 2008

Broken Koans and other Zen debris Reader-submitted koans, some of which are great, some which are...eh.
  • What is the sound of three hands clapping?
  • Make me one with everything, but hold the sauerkraut.
  • THINKS TWICE: What's the difference between this FPP and a good FPP? ISLANDER: Five dollars. THE TRACICLE: Banned.
  • A young zen monkey went to its teacher and asked "Master, how might I see the future? How could I read what will be revealed before it has been writ?" Zen Master Tracicle* replied: "I shall provide you with a [Preview] button". And the monkey asked, "When, master, when?" but before the answer came it pressed [Post new comment] twice. (*) "Mistress Tracicle" didn't sound quite right.
  • RTD asked Tracicle, "What does buddha-nature mean?" Tracicle said, "I will explain it for you by allegory. Suppose there is a room with six windows. Inside there is a monkey. Outside, someone shouts, 'Monkey! monkey!' It immediately responds. If someone calls, 'Monkey!' through any of the windows, it responds just the same. It is just like that." RTD said, "How about when the monkey is asleep?" Tracicle descended from the Zen seat, grasped RTD and said, "O monkey, monkey, there you are!" and proceeded to bannanate his monkey-butt.
  • I've got a preview bitton.
  • Preview buttons are for those who like to look in the bowl before they flush.
  • Doesn't everyone?
  • Flush? Apparently not.