July 29, 2008

The breeding properties of M&Ms Someone posts a message to Roger Ebert's blog about how he makes M&Ms "duel" to figure out which is stronger.

The fact that Ebert published the letter fills me with love. Although, that's probably the Percocet talking.

posted by Koko 16 years ago
  • My letter!
  • Who usually wins when he fights an M against a W?
  • I eat the blue ones, but they don't taste the same.
  • I damn the blue ones, and mourn the fall-themed colors of my childhood.
  • Remember when red ones were poison?
  • wikipedia sez-They currently contain Allura red AC (FD&C Red #40). In Europe, Allura red AC (E129) is not recommended for consumption by children. It is banned in Denmark, Belgium, France, Germany, Switzerland, Sweden, Austria, and Norway Then they are still poison! Yay!
  • I always squeeze two plain M&M's together until one breaks before eating them, but I never took note of the colors before. It was just to create the perfect sized dose of chocolate with a mix of immediate and timed release. When I were a lass, M&M's were brown, tan, orange, yellow, and green. Garden colors. Harvest colors. No cartoon hues. *shakes fist at kids on lawn*
  • I used to do that with Oreos, back before I was eating them the right way.* *Being to put them in your mouth whole, and then drink some milk to dunk them in your mouth (obv., natch).
  • Typical American! Thinking that M&Ms are superior and can be bred to produce a super M&M! I bet Smarties would crush every single M&M in a fight to the death... That's right, you heard it here first.
  • When they got rid of tan, I called the 800 number and got all WTF on their asses. They said they were planning on putting a new color in the bag, so they had a survey and got rid of the least popular m&m. According to them, they can only put so many colors in one bag. That's right, there's a limit on the number of colors that can fit in one bag!! I tried making a website for the return of tan m&m. It was a pathetic website. I don't want my m&ms pretending to be skittles. I want them to be m&ms.
  • Wasn't this originally on Craigslist? I could swear I saw this on best of Craigslist. I know for a fact I've read it before... Aha!
  • I bet Smarties would crush every single M&M in a fight to the death No. This is NOT SO.
  • Totally so. Smarties have a much higher shell-to-chocolate ratio. You druggie.
  • No. This is NOT SO. Bad attitude for someone applying for citizenship.
  • No. This is NOT SO. Put your money where your mouth is. *slaps a fiver* *pulls a blue Smartie for the first duel*
  • *starts to calculate shell-to-chocolate ratios using maths*
  • Mind you, my Smarties are dyed au naturale, and will easily penetrate the chemical compounds used to make your precious M&M's glow in vivid hues. Hahahahaha...!
  • I smite you all with my Reese's Pieces.
  • *Grabs popcorn and "GO SMARTIES" banner, waits for competition to begin*
  • *coats pills in chocolate, covers with shiny enamel coating, blasts in kiln* Now that's good eatin'! *breaks tooth, sues self*
  • True story: I did a mixed animation/short film titled "The Reese's Pieces Wars" back in the mid 80's - - aliens invaded Earth to steal every single Reese's Pieces, but found that they did not like the orange ones so much.
  • >>Aha! Thanks! I had the same feeling but would never have found it.
  • Koko, I wonder if Bernockle, Fast Food Lawyer takes candy cases.
  • Yeah, like the shell test is more important than THE FLAVOR!!! M&M's rule.
  • * Waits patiently for the Arts major to finish his calculations *
  • I wonder if Bernockle, Fast Food Lawyer takes candy cases We find the defendant ... DELICIOUS!
  • Your Honor, I move to strike the above comment as Hershey!
  • we get a ruling from Judge Fudge?
  • I never cared about individual colors, it was pairs that bothered me. Never, ever eat a dark brown and a red at the same time. And somewhere in the back of my brain is the faint memory of how you can stick the m&m in some water and the "m" will float off to be put to other uses.
  • When I was a lad, the preferred color-sensitive candy was Chuckles™. There were five different flavored Chuckles in each pack, and the protocol was clear: You ate the red one last. The red Chuckle was the supreme, tastiest Chuckle. The other four did not deserve to kiss the hem of its garment.
  • Word. And the green Chuckle, you just plugged your nose and nommed to get through it on the way to the red.
  • Smarties are the best and that opinion isn't humble. ;) I never eat just one Smartie, or just one M&M. It's handfuls. I'm addicted to the crunching noises. Who is Roger Ebert? O, a fillum critic. That explains that bit of ignorance!
  • I eet Eminems.
  • Wasn't this originally on Craigslist? I'm sorry to say that I remember this story from long before Craigslist ever existed. I remember this circulating on Usenet many years ago. A search on Google Groups has the oldest version dated to 12 December, 1996: Chocolate as seduction (was: A call to all who submit stories)
  • Put me down for five on Smarties, too.
  • You guys are totally missing the point of this post, which is that I simultaneously pwned both Koko and Roger Ebert. n00bs.
  • Hot!
  • *YAWN*