July 15, 2008

• The Gallery of Awful Bridesmaid Dresses For my turn as a bridesmaid for my music teacher pal, our dresses were out of a high-achool choir apparel catalog.
• I'm a fan of The Bride wore what? Best of the web, circa 1995...
• Why're you looking up wedding stuff, kit? Is there something you'd like to tell us? Tell me?
• Get a room, you two. The best wedding cake EVAR! That said, I hate twinkies, ding-dongs, and all the rest, but most wedding cake taste like sewer crud and costs 6000 times as much as this one did. Plus, individual servings!
• I was featured one time on Wild Weddings (or something like that) on TLC (or whatever network that is on). I received a call from a college friend of mine asking for my permission to have Wild Weddings play the clip of me from his wedding. I agreed. I even got paid. I received a check for 250 or so dollars.
• Bernockles Gone Wild? What?
• I remember that episode of "Bernockle: Wedding Caterer Lawyer."
• World's Ugliest Wedding Cakes has some amusing photos, while we're talking matrimonial misfires. I attended one event where the bride had requested a three-part cake with sections connected by plastic fountain bridges, ostensibly with colored water flowing merrily throughout. The pump broke before things got going, however; I recall lots of clear molded plastic and puddles of dyed blue water. Looked like a Tidy Bowl demo. I couldn't stop giggling until I realized how seriously the bride was taking the whole thing. But it wasn't as bad as what happened with the beer fountain. Considering what's out there, stacked snack cakes seem downright pragmatic.
• This worries me. Brides are powerful juju, strong mana. He who mocks a bride will be pursued by the erinyes. Or marry one. Or something.
• I'm sure we all remember this wedding cake monstrosity that was in the news a while back.
• I never thought the words "Twinkie," "wedding cake" and "awesome" would ever occur in the same sentence, but here it is: awesome Twinkie wedding cake.
• awesome Twinkie wedding cake.