March 18, 2004

Curious George: WhachacallIT? Make up a word or phrase for, y'know, it.
  • Freebasing the Pop-Tarts.
  • I don't understand the question. Well, I don't think I do.
  • Enlightening Curious George.
  • Tickling the Hun.
  • And I just thought of a few more: confusing the albatross forgetting the keys enlightening the freemason unsettling the yeoman prodding the electorate feeding the monkey FORNICATING LIKE A SINNER hob-nobbing with the hoi polloi clubbing the baby seal ok, I'll stop now....
  • The 101st way to skin a cat. yech, that even grosses me out.
  • I contribute "Progressing through the pink dialectic", but I freely confess that I have no idea which of several possible 'it's you're talking about...
  • To snog.
  • dng & flashboy: wink wink nudge, eh? Woooaaaahh! Wooaahhhh! goetter: oh sure, take all the dirty out of it why'ncha. Well, snog was inspiring at any rate.
  • Taking the skin boat to tuna town.
  • That's me, the super killjoy. I agree, "snogging" sounds so much more inspiringly dirty than (e.g.) "mashing" or "making out."
  • coloring bookery j-lo's crackerjack prize the sunset margarita grilling the dictionary
  • reefing the pink mainsail dredging the love canal abusing the Executive Privilege reupholstering the skin sofa rolling out the pink pastry cramming for the biology midterm /getting with the prurient program
  • Curating the saliva museum Tipping the doorman at the fuck hotel Impressing Mrs. Jenkins with your knowledge of Latin verbs Detaining the foreign national without trial for a rude interrogation by Colonel Toungue
  • ...Tongue.
  • *hands out stiffies*
  • Dolph: Oh, man! You kissed a girl! Jimbo: That is so gay!
  • repaying the Chicago bookie. commencing the cat-agitating hour. tinkering with legos. peanut-butter-jelly-time. preparing the state of the union address. flossing in the closet.
  • ousting the oligarchy gesturing toward the reformation putting a smile on Mrs. Wilson's dentist clogging while Rome burns pressing the hamster pulling a Lou Rawls slappin' taters numbering the apostles
  • Infringing the Monet Mincing the Grand Pentathlon Rustling the Crow Clicking Refresh Taking the Cacafuego The Wondrous Morrissey Pedalo Adventure Titus Bramble
  • slug slappin' a civilized game of bridge noggy goodness hangover breakfasting on hot dogs and budweiser at coney island gooching the pantaloons
  • (This is reminding me of the Blue Jam 'Bad Sex' sketch) Cackle My Gladys?
  • Darn it, I hate it when I miss the best discussions! I quite like the word 'snog' myself. Sounds like two pigs going at it. (No offense quidnuc, I use it on myself too!) Is the term 'petting' still in fashion anywhere?
  • All swimming pools in the entirety of Britain seemingly have a sign up saying what you can not do at the swimming pool. Petting is always one of them, for some reason. These signs are the only place I've ever heard (seen) the word petting used, though. (And I haven't been to a swimming pool in about five years, so whether they still use these signs, I don't know)
  • Heavy petting, dng. My neck of the woods, it was only heavy petting that was prohibited. Oh, and shit your leg off.
  • It was round here as well, I think, flashboy. Oh, and shit your leg off. Only if you'll whack my bonobo. Or introduce me to Gladstone, at least.
  • Hello!
  • /Gladstone
  • Now I'm lost. Who's Gladstone?
  • biting the wax tadpole
  • well, we seem to have forgotten several classics... tonsil hockey swappin' spit dry humping porking and i once knew a guy who coined the term "two-handed jack-slap". that phrase still amuses me.
  • another classic of sorts: rustling cattle through the Vatican
  • GramMa┬« is shocked! SHOCKED, I say. Will you Monkeys pleeze get your tongues outta the GUTTER? Somebody think of the children. Hummph! In MY day we called IT posting to the comment box
  • What Gramma said. Will all children please leave the room. Thank you. This has been a public service announcement brought to you by Trojan. If you don't go all the way, you're a wimp.
  • IT.
  • No relation to Cousin IT? /off-topic
  • Will you Monkeys pleeze get your tongues outta the GUTTER? Get our tongues out of the goetter? sorry...
  • All right bone, go to your room. ALONE DAMMIT!
  • Oh. Darn. *Goes back to own room*
  • Y'all SO don't want your tongues over here. Trust me on this. Not that bone ain't cute and all, but, you know.
  • Suprise! Captain Ahab and the legendary bearded clam Playing with the elevator Rubbing the Ruben As I have nothing else to contribute: Hey, you hear the one about Gandhi? So, his followers are talking to him after one of his fasts. He hasn't eaten or brushed his teeth for weeks. He's really weak from not eating, and pacing his cell the whole time. Yeah, he was a super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
  • boning
  • Wait, wait. I thought we were talking about snogging? How did it get to uh... bearded clams?
  • Forgot to specify where we were kissing Alnedra. Sorry if it boned the thread for anybody.
  • no no, not snogging - IT. Y'know . . *wink* . . IT? Whipping the tiller fool injected overdrive tracking back to quonsar marcia marcia marcia!
  • This thread is dripping with smut. You all deserve a good spanking.
  • painting the pink patio enrolling for night classes at Intercourse U.
  • ...specify where we were kissing Alnedra... OK, so where were we kissing Alnedra? Ridiculing Old Man Frottage Porping the beneflux Contributing to McSweeney's Popping up to the fifth floor to use the colour photocopier
  • You guys are depraved! Depraved, I tell you! And I was thiiis close to bone's room.
  • in that case, petebest... taking a conference call reading maxim self-flagellation waxing the dolphin finding the little man in the canoe checking the prostate jiggling the berries oiling the serpent squeezing one off watching a cable channel with fuzzy reception playing the skin-flute soaping a little too vigorously in the bath self-buggery joining the mile high club (solo flyers division) exercising the weasel exorcising the demons diddling whacking listening to rosy palmer and the digits finding jack in the pulpit releasing some tension spanking the redheaded stepchild developing a callus making yogurt necessitating a palm-shave and the classic going blind
  • You also forgot carpal tunnel syndrome, frogs.
  • trust me, alnedra, i didn't forget about it. i'm just having it treated. (actually i think the syndrome was caused by a summer working in a factory compounded by playing doom 'til my wrists hurt when it first came out... i can still work those arrow keys like a mothafucka! but you make your own judgement...)
  • cl frogs, I see you list, and raise you: Impeaching the bald president Checking Mr. Cock into the Hand Hotel Taking Captain Picard to warp speed Bouncing the pink coconuts up and down the palm on wank elastic Catching the slow boat going south of the Pyrenees to engage in the resistance movement Shuttlecock
  • Too much information! Ok, let's see: Speckling the walls Polishing the rifle Cranking the Cardinal Ouch. Had CPS myself two years back. Playing PSX, before anyone starts up again.
  • Finding out who shot Kennedy Tight Club Non-profit Whiskey Angling Burbling Angelic Reenactment The Carson Daily
  • Creaming Ashley Giles through the covers A marvellous exhibition of stroke play Going round the wicket Asking for middle Steve Harmison going down your leg side Flint off /2nd test coverage
  • In MY day we called IT posting to the comment box tsk tsk tsk This whole thread appears to be nothing but verbal mutual masturbation. Petebest, you started it. GramMa┬« sez Timeout. Go stand in the corner. Get your hands OFFA that keyboard and INTO yer pockets! Santa Claws is NOT happy with the rest of you.
  • /pouts (but still thinks about it.)
  • On a related note, 'Tragic Battery Failure' would make a great band name. Whot?!
  • flashboy: typing one-handed in the chat room shaking hands with the unemployed playing the front nine just adjusting myself cleaning out the plumbing putting the pink beast to bed twanging the bowstring tickling the ivories running out of Kleenex dirtying a tube sock knocking it down and how 'bout this one to end it: choking senor wences ok. i'll stop now. i'm afraid i'm beginning to look a wee bit like a perv...
  • the jig's up frogs. ;)
  • grooming the trail paving the parking strip bushwhacking the Amazon
  • Goetter, You are sooo asking for a grounding from GramMa.
  • Goetter, you're gonna get a bushwhacking if you don't straighten out! GramMa wonders: why did that seem to come out wrong?
  • Can I come out of my room yet?
  • y'know considering *all* of the ways this thread could have gone wrong earlier, I'd like to congratulate the simian community on their restraint. /thanking_the_monkey
  • Ok Bone, com'on out, lunch is ready. Wash your hands first.
  • from everlasting blort: the random masturbation naming thingy or something like that.
  • Also needs a NSFW, because of the huge green "M" word, thank ye kindly.
  • lobbying the Senator
  • completely raging full on dork from Keith Talent in 1615
  • Wash your hands first. I'm gonna need a brillo pad and industrial-strength soap. And a couple of hours.
  • Now there's a fun date.
  • Invading Iraq
  • boo: Cream your khakis, not Iraqis!
  • formatting the hard drive
  • Every time I think this thread has climaxed, there's always another little spurt of activity. Can't you people keep your hands off and quit jerking it around?
  • Sorry I'm late. Has anyone mentioned: Milking the one-eyed aphid Priming the spunk gun Choking the chihuahua Wittling the gut stick Boutros Boutrosing the Golly ?
  • Wittling the gut stick Is that a personal comment about somebody named Wittler?
  • James McNeil Wittler.
  • you're not just wittling dixie... (For the record, a person who carves a piece of wood - but not necessarily a woody - is spelled W-H-I-T-T-L-E-R. The spelling of Wendell's Real Life Last Name is W-I-T-T-L-E-R, and is German in origin, which made it easier for my 5th Grade classmates to call me "Hitler", although they also made some rather unflattering remarks about "Wittler's Mother".) Meanwhile, may I add to the list of euphemisms: (with Seinfeldian inspiration) Losing the Contest Losing your Domain (to Cybersquatters?) Mastering the Hobby Horse Taking the Bate (I think a bit more appropriate for women) Bating the Trap Taking a Kit Kat Break Commenting on Your Own Thread The Washington Post March (WAPO, WAPO, WAPO...) Fapping in the Wind Carsmut (as in auto-erotic?)
  • I like to call it: As wrong as Wendell...
  • ya know this started out about euphemisms for intercourse, but i see the power of the infernet has made it's nature known . . . CTRL+ALT+DEL
  • That's what I thought it was at first, but as the meaning drifted from IT to IT, we finally got around to something I could relate to. But then returning to the original concept: The Beast With Two Backs, One of Them Hairy Consciously Sleeping Sharing Multiple Bodily Fluids Moving Violations In & Out Burger, Animal Style Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet The Most Fun You Can Have Without Laughing (trust me, when somebody starts laughing, it's no fun anymore)
  • It's always fun when someone is laughing.
  • So long as nobody's pointing at anything while laughing.
  • Depends what they're pointing with...
  • BlueHorse points with ten-foot pole* at this thread *points the BROWN end of the schtick
  • *scurries up tree*
  • A ten-foot Pole? Does the NBA know about this? Or maybe you got that long stick from here.
  • The off-handed mouse click Beating around the bush Decorating the maypole Setting your phaser to stun Interrupting your regularly scheduled programming Denial of Service attack Unreasonable search and seizure Exercising your upper register The big ol' goodun The good ol' bigun Evading the revenuers Abusing the urchin
  • A night in with the girls. Dialing the rotary phone. and the classic: airing the orchid.
  • warning... very direspectful... The Reagan Funeral (giving way too much attention to a stiff)
  • Ok,back to the topic at hand, so to speak. Has any of you actually used those euphemisms? Using them while in high school doesn't count. And, which ones apply to which variety of sex (which is what I call it when it isn't "hot monkey love")? Or, is simple better?
  • Oh, oh, now Path's gettin' personal. Looks like this isn't going to be just an exercise in rhetoric anymore. (heh heh--gonna exercise the rhetoric)
  • wendell i'm very disappointed in you. that should have been in italics. heheheh. path - I plan to use each and every one at the earliest opportunity.
  • "Down in Nagasaki Where the fellows chew tobaccy And the women wicky wacky woo".
  • testifying in front of the senate commission.
  • Sticking pins in the frog's eye.
  • bumping uglies
  • hide the mouse
  • Another great thread brought to you courtesy of "Anonymous". Long may it reign.
  • plausible deniability
  • *glares at Wolof* oh and "the Beached Whale Boogie" as one of the sports announcers says.
  • Must add "fondling the Oscar" Ah, nothing like olishing the ol' trophy
  • excuse me, I need to P on that last post
  • Hey, I actually worked for the people who manufactured the Oscar trophys years ago, and you can imagine the chatter when a not-that-long-before Best Actress winner sent her award back in for re-plating. I am so sorry I said that.
  • what, they're not chocolate?
  • Suspending the Election
  • I know there's no way in hell you're going to answer this question, but I have to ask: Who, pray tell?
  • Marianne Faithfull?
  • Protesting the Inauguration
  • Adjusting your set. Wait, don't touch that dial.
  • Bringing the submarine up to periscope depth and deploying the pink snorkel.
  • Sneezing on the client
  • Sending Renfield to the cellar.
  • besting the pete. classing the middle tool.
  • Pledging the Oath of Orifice.
  • Hasseling the Hoff.
  • Inaugurating the Bush.
  • I never went for the "first base, second base" thing myself. For me, it was "Jeopardy", "Double Jeopardy" and "Final Jeopardy". Yes, I am a life-long nerd. And yes, I did have to retire after five wins.
  • And I just remembered an old friend who once commented that "married sex is like punching a clock," then I thought of one of MeFi's favorite catchphrases and began cringing uncontrolably.
  • bucket of clocks?
  • Firing up the glue gun.
  • [For transsexuals:] Visiting the old neighborhood.
  • *cockpunches petebest* the latest euphemisms... Stuffing the ballot box. Raising the alert level. Supplying Wal-Mart. Lip-synching with Ashlee. Meeting the Fockers. TiVoing Desperate Housewives. Reporting yourselves to the FCC. Choking down the Double Thickburger.
  • hehe Holding the Oscar? ;)
  • that's Polishing the Oscartm petey. Besting the Pete? Or Beating the Pest? Meeting Mathowie The Freezerburnt Secret Deepfrying the Penguins Bunny suicide Excavating Tuthankhamun
  • Petting the Beast? Attending the Golden Globes Accepting the Palm d'Or
  • Clinting Eastwood.
  • Confirming the Chief Justice
  • Skewering the pork tenderloin.
  • Waiting for FEMA
  • Melting the icecap Swiping the plastic Wavin' the fob Tuning the piano
  • Pre-emptive strike
  • Besting the Pete
  • Oh g'wan!
  • Petting the rabbit
  • Being certain of Heisenberg
  • Finding cheese in the fjord
  • Scratching my banana
  • Rally Monkey Time!!!!
  • Attaching a document...
  • Invoking the 25th Amendment...
  • Petting the rabbit I misread that as Petering the rabbit heh heh...
  • Take your mitts off that bunny, Tech! Fingering the keyboard
  • Beetrooting.
  • Interviewing the President ("Quizzing the POTUS" is also acceptable)
  • Don't touch that POTUS, Pete! You don't know where it's been.
  • Fisting the kit.
  • Right next to his SCOTUS, I'll wager.
  • Don't touch that POTUS, Pete! Ya varmit!
  • Posting to keep the thread alive
  • Double-posting in the afternoon! Awwww yeah!
  • Giggety giggety!
  • Medicating the cat.
  • Sleepwalking.
  • Phooning Never mind.
  • Caulking.
  • Taking the Tardis for a spin.
  • Kerning & tracking. Oh, yeah, tighter! I need more color! Watch for the hanging orphans!
  • Referencing the Fenlands.
  • Sweetening the day.
  • Putting my penis in my wife's vagina.
  • *pulls MCT aside, shows rules of thread*
  • Pulling MCT aside.
  • Keeping your wife warm.
  • Doin' the flu-wiki.
  • Sacrificing the sick bird.
  • Coercing Charity.
  • Snail bridge-crossing.
  • Turkmening the Bashi
  • Basting the turducken
  • Rebuilding the pink Buddha
  • Doing the Google-Kai!
  • Chaining down the junk-faxer's jet.
  • wacking the middleclasstool
  • Engaging in sexual congress, usually through one or more of the following methods: (1) Direct vaginal intercourse (using penis or foreign objects) (2) Oral sex (cunnilingus/fellatio) (3) Anal sex (also using penis or other objects) (4) "Mutual masturbation" (hand-to-genital contact resulting in orgasm)
  • Fucking.
  • Convening the sexual congress.
  • Cuttin' her cake with my knife
  • TURDUCKEN! I recently had the opportunity to tell some Italians (like, in Italy) about Turducken and now they are all on fire to try it /derail and um...Leaving cookie crumbs in the bed!
  • Peanutbutter! I love peanutbutter! (doing the Medusa)
  • Trolling the Bush thread.
  • Duggar Dunkin'.
  • Failing as a group to comment on the "Commercials of Harry Egipt!" post.
  • "Trolling the Bush thread"! Ha! Beauty one.
  • Downloading porn.
  • Registering the sock puppet hey there, fedora/alex!
  • Playing games.
  • Returning to the fold :)
  • Mixing the metaphor.
  • Burying the hatchet.
  • Putting the banana back in the peel.
  • Docking the starship.
  • Making cave paintings.
  • Wrestling the strap-on pirate.
  • Harpooning the kitty. Failing as a group to comment on the "Commercials of Harry Egipt!" post. Heh, at least I know you were thinking of me...
  • its FEEDING the kitty. FEEEDINGGG!!!! mmmmrrrrowwwwwrrrrr!!!
  • Couldn't help myself after reading this
  • Treating the Irishman for alcohol poisioning at the 24 hour pub.
  • DeLay's perp walk.
  • Burnin' a session. Look, I can cram another 40Mb on this CD! Yeas, there you go!
  • Present participling the direct object.
  • Rearousing the bisexual orgy thread.
  • oh come on! how 'bout "beheading the medusa"??
  • No, more like 'Fluffing the Medusa...'
  • Saluting the Flagpole.
  • Advertising for ebay. now that IT has become a TV commercial, I think this thread has run ITS course.
  • mmm medusa fluffing...droool /homer simpson
  • Applying the turquoise highlights.
  • Consolidating debts.
  • snatching flys
  • oh come one! "David Copperfield impregnating a woman on stage" har!
  • oh come ON!
  • Freeing the West Memphis Three. This is easy!
  • Putting the bunny in the hat.
  • Getting Claudia Schiffer up the duff. /ouchers
  • Plugging OpenOffice?
  • Clickign through Hiroshi Yoshii's Online Portfolio?
  • Clicking through Hiroshi Yoshii's Online Portfolio?
  • Double clickin' the "Post new comment" button!
  • ooh! I love having my post button double clicked!!
  • Making a spelling mistake, noticing it after clicking post, hitting "stop" on the browser hoping it will stop the comment from going through, fixing the mistake, hitting post again, then realizing it did post the first one anyway and now petebest is going to make fun of you.
  • Doing something petebest is going to make fun of.
  • Opening a Word Document in OpenOffice.org
  • welcoming back quonsar
  • Getting referenced on "The Daily Show"
  • welcoming back MiguelCardoso
  • Finding a possum in your backyard
  • Putting snakes on a plane! can't beleive somebody hadn't previously come up with that one
  • Finding Tarantino's films childish and vastly overrated.
  • Throwing a hot dog down a warm hallway
  • Referencing metafilter in-jokes on monkeyfilter.
  • Finding a possum in your backyard Ouch. Sounds painful. Is that like 'Taking a detour to Greece'..?
  • Phooning in the blue
  • Slicing the pink sushi pie.
  • Releasing the hounds!
  • One more game in Busch Stadium
  • Logging the Amazon
  • Viral advertising
  • Battering the Gulf
  • Battering the chicken
  • oooh good one wendell!
  • Introducing a new ipod.
  • Beating Notre Dame in the last 3 seconds
  • Playing the White Sox
  • Filling up on the Value Menu
  • Cracking, Gromit!
  • Free-falling Bush bashathon.
  • Eek!-ing the Post.
  • Digging for clams.
  • Flogging the meme.
  • Shucking oysters.
  • Exploring the Great Barrier Reef.
  • Supressing the insurgency
  • Doubling the entendre.
  • making the butter/margirine comparison.
  • running the "add one for every new post" idea into the ground.
  • being really bored at work.
  • mmmm . . gonna have to disqualify that last one, doctor.
  • a rousing defense of our favorite spread!
  • Once more into the breech.
  • Thinking about painting the ceiling beige.
  • Checking the ceiling for cracks, path?
  • Shutting down the 405.
  • Editing levels.
  • Has anyone done "Spamming the blogs" yet?
  • Separating the wheat from the chaff.
  • Posting under your girlfriend's username.
  • that last one was me
  • Challenging the Pharisees
  • Romancing the_bone
  • Riding out the hurricane.
  • Liberating the fat. Viva! Viva!
  • churning the butter
  • goshdarn you petebest!!! I was going to liberate the fat!! me MEEE!!!!
  • buttering the churn!
  • caulking the windows keeping the draft out fullfilling Drjimmy's prediction
  • Chimp grunts.
  • Getting a mug shot.
  • Beta-testing the flock
  • Using the rolling pin
  • Flash Friday!
  • Mortar and Pestle Attorneys at Law?
  • Smokin'! Yes, it's a cross-site reference; so sue me.
  • Suing Wendell!
  • Oh, yeah, Granma, sue me, baby, make me take a deposition!
  • Hey, you two, behave or I'll call Gran... Oh, wait. Sorry. Don't mind me. /tiptoes away, closes door, snickers softly
  • Dive bombing the starling.
  • Pumpion
  • Frightening the youngins Come on in to my chambers, Wendell, and you can take off your legal briefs.
  • Oh, BlueHorse! Ususally my motions are denied and I have to plea bargain! Just don't declare a mistrial because of a hung jury... And the rest of you, calm down, the legal system does this to us all the time, we might as well enjoy it for once...
  • objection!
  • Overruled.
  • Quashing the indictment.
  • Spankin' a homer over the wall.
  • Firing the Special Prosecutor.
  • islander, aren't baseball euphemisms kind of done to death? If not... White Soxing the Umpire as if they didn't get enough bad calls in their favor against the Angels, now the ump can't tell the difference between the sound of a ball hitting a bat and hitting an arm? I'm getting annoyed.
  • Mmmmm, nothing like throwing yourself on the "mercy" of the "court" Com'on, Judge Wendell, let me bang your gavel.
  • "Back, and to the left... back, and to the left... back, and to the left..."
  • Rubbing in the Astroglide.
  • Breaching the levee.
  • Flooding the neighborhood below sea level.
  • Busing the evacuees
  • BlueHorse, another outburst like that and I'll clear the court and remand you into custody. Now, take the stand and prepare for some serious cross-examination. You are definately being upheld on appeal. Now show me some evidence, starting with Exhibit A. (I feel like a character on "Boston Legal", and no, I don't mean Shatner)
  • Shatner covering The Beatles
  • Dancing with animated Hitler.
  • meanwhile, outside the courtroom... Installing Rockwool. Making the Transamerica Tower in jello. Selling McDonalds. Delousing with Zyklon B.
  • Wiggling the president.
  • Shatner covering Pulp And, back into the courtroom: Jury rigging Being in loco parentis
  • Being in loco parentis *calls police*
  • Calling for a recess Whoooo, was that as good for you, Wendell, as it was for me? I rest my case.
  • I think I've exhausted my appeals.
  • Oyez! Oyez! Oyez!
  • Spanning the green.
  • Springing the perp.
  • Let us never speak of this moment of savage lust again.It shall be our secret.
  • Ha! No such luck... forgot the court transcripts and artist renderings? Just wait until all this resurfaces on the Smoking Gun. Oh, the shame!
  • Tora! Tora! Tora!
  • Instilling a strong racial identity.
  • How do we keep it a secret? I know... LET'S KILL ALL THE LAWYERS! That's another one: Killing all the lawyers.
  • swearing the Monkeys to secrecy
  • Getting a gag order.
  • Building bipartisan consensus.
  • Negotiating a mutually agreeable settlement.
  • Making landfall as a Category 5.
  • Passing a new constitution as opposed to passing a stone...
  • Detonating the Bunker Buster.
  • Getting a straight flush on the river.
  • Directing the king of comedy.
  • Steam-cleaning Kitfisto's birthday suit
  • Blowing out the candles.
  • Meating the aliens.
  • Going to a member meating.
  • Fitzmas Morning.
  • Reading boxscores.
  • Getting beef jerky.
  • interrobanging
  • Taking the rat for a swim.
  • Oooohhh, I like how down and dirty that sounds, Wibble... mmmmhhh...
  • Obstructing justice... I know BlueHorse is gonna hold me in contempt for that...
  • Linking to Boing Boing
  • Holding Wendell in contempt... WAIT, not this again!
  • hey, it was the most action I've gotten all year...
  • Having a retrial. He. Ha. He. He.
  • Dropping candy in the bucket.
  • Badgering the witness.
  • Carving the pumpkin.
  • Trick or treating.
  • Eating the Mars bar
  • Determining whether charges will be laid.
  • A hot knife in butter.
  • I'm sorry to announce that this thread has now been made technologically obsolete by the Always Amusing Euphemism Generator, via the Chatty MeFites. Ten consecutive reloads generated the following: driving the pink pooch. nibbling at the trout. hugging the forbidden smurfy champion. locating the paisley reload button. burning the sloppy oboe. yodeling in the short meat. shaking hands with the cheap guy. playing with the bus. scrubbing the moist goodness. digging the groovy wax rabbit. Maybe not Always Amusing, but frequently Spit-Coffee-on-Monitor-Fall-Off-Chair-Laugh-Ass-Off-Funny.
  • Meh. Bots. Linkin' from the blue. I dare any AI to come up with something like that, ha!
  • Throw the bum outta the thread! Wendell, you want to do it mechanically, you go right ahead. The rest of us prefer using our noggins. heh, using the old noggin
  • Greetin' the Trick-or-Treater How do you do?!
  • Well, I've been brainstorming, and I just came up with these: driving the pink pooch. nibbling at the trout. hugging the forbidden smurfy champion. locating the paisley reload button. burning the sloppy oboe. yodeling in the short meat. shaking hands with the cheap guy. playing with the bus. scrubbing the moist goodness. digging the groovy wax rabbit.
  • Making the mouse sing.
  • Dissing the bot.
  • (from recent posts) Hiding the art. Naming the Galah. Interrogating David Hicks. Using a New Zealand urinal. Making like a statue in the St. Louis Zoo. Tallulah Bankheading. Making the male mice sing. Accessing the AP stylebook.
  • Wendell, you want to do it mechanically, you go right ahead. First it was all wrapped in legalese, now gizmos. Ah, kids today... ; )
  • Using a New Zealand urinal I'm guessing that's one you keep "between the guys" as it were . . . Making the male mice sing. *ahem*
  • Scrambling the eggs.
  • Herding semen.
  • Tickling the Traficant
  • crankin' the mechanic
  • keeping up with the joneses...
  • forcing a secret senate session...
  • > keeping up with the joneses... and not jonesing to keep it up?
  • Selling the Bunker Finding the Dork Within Conference Biking Conjoined Country Star (let's face it; these days, everything is a euphemism for IT. At least I didn't bring up the penis size court defense....ooop.)
  • Ha! A posting by wendell hmmm he may be right about that . .
  • the only difference between a wendell posting and IT is that wendell does the former a lot more often...
  • Besting your peter?
  • Chesseing the Queso.
  • um...donating sperm??????
  • making eye contact with Medusa...
  • Celebrating Spritzmas
  • Coercing the donation
  • generating a sonic boom pushing the posting button...but before you do, give me some preview, baby Uunnhh, Pete, have you noticed lately it's been just you, me, and Wendell in this thread, with an occasional "drop-in" who never sticks around very long? Is this getting kinky, or what?
  • BlueHorse, allow me to assure you I "drop-in" to ogle the kinky action, oh yeah!
  • ooo hot monkey-on-monkey action! *gets popcorn*
  • Toad the wet sprocket
  • Becoming a drop-in. sigh
  • Not getting the panexa
  • lurking
  • MonkeyFilter: Beginning to look a wee bit like a perv... MonkeyFilter: Always another little spurt of activity MonkeyFilter: Is this getting kinky or what?
  • The McRib Farewell Tour.
  • Getting slashdotted.
  • Getting fossilized. (I thought better of posting this link to the front page)
  • Peer-to-peer filesharing.
  • Mythbusting.
  • You're in the zone, wendell!
  • Demonstrating the full power of this battle station
  • Save your energy BearGuy. This whole freakin' thread is a tagline. freakin' the thread postin' the taglines Oooooo, hey everybody, Bernockle thinks he's got a powerstation
  • Bernockle thinks he's got a Death Star... Blowing up the Death Star. Using the Force. Turning to the Dark Side. Podracing. Meeting Jar Jar Binks. Starting the Clone Wars. Quoting "Star Wars"...(I've got a bad feeling about this)
  • Getting in the zone...
  • wendell pull up! You're going in too fast! Oops - dang these things write themselves don't they
  • (While watching daytime TV) Getting Regis Out of Control! Come on down! Plinko! Using all your lifelines. Guesting on Jerry Springer. Getting Judged by Judy. Joining Oprah's Book Club. Following the Guiding Light. Passing a Povich Paternity Test.
  • (and from the front page of MoFi... Shaming Sony. Drilling for Oil in ANWR. Hiding the Hummers. Wearing off the Teflon. The Other Good Thing. (I think it's about time to announce my retirement...)
  • retiring the wendell
  • (how did I forget this one?) Auditioning for a French Director. Okay, now I quit. (But 'retiring the wendell' sounds like what I did when I realized I was asexual...)
  • Hey? What happened to ??? Do I hafta use <strong> now?
  • the Hidden Hummers.
  • So, I think I need a 500 word essay from each of you to tell me how your definitaion of "it" is explanitory. Please have then on my desk by Wednesday.
  • Nibbling the raw tuna. Is Thursday ok?
  • How many of the 500 words should be "fuck"?
  • Whatever is Wendell talking about?
  • Gee, Wendell, we know already! Quit bragging you're so much of a sexual.
  • ahemsexual And an HTML idiot who forgot the bold tag is <b>, not <bold>... to which I must add... Stacking the Cats. HIT* *Human Intercourse Task Bombing Parliament. His name is Guy What?
  • dusting off the Mencken
  • taking it out on Wendell
  • amazed this wasn't in here Posting in the thread
  • teasing the French
  • Frenching the tease.
  • Pants Area Meetup
  • posting to the comment box postin' the taglines pushing the posting button Variations on a theme, my boy, variations on a theme. OK, OK--variating the theme
  • Having a meetup. "So, whatcha doin' this weekend?" "Eh, going to a... meetup. Yeah, that." "Sure, yeah..."
  • Attacking the Bush
  • From Spinal Tap's classic "Sex Farm:" Getting out my pitch fork and poking your hay Scratching in your henhouse Sniffing at your feedbag Slipping out your back door and leaving my spray Hosing down your barn door Bothering you livestock I'm scretching in your pea patch Plowing through your beanfield Planting my seed
  • "sniffing at your feedbag . . . bothering your livestock" - i'd forgotten that. thanks.
  • you knew it was coming MonkeyFilter: This whole freakin' thread is a tagline.
  • Fixing MonkeyFilter while tracicle's in the shower. Taglining the thread.
  • Sparring with the press corps.
  • Doing a jackknife into the deep end.
  • Prolonging the thread! and prolonging...and prolonging Energizing the bunny.
  • Overloading the backend.
  • Re-hosting the files.
  • scanning the port
  • Getting kitfistoed. Playing with homunculus' mascot.