December 18, 2007

Seasons greetings! Mommy, what is that lady doing to Santa?
posted by es el Queso 16 years ago
  • That's no way to respect Christmas tradition, which says that Santa is the one doing the groping.
  • .
  • cue bad santa clips
  • Is nothing sacred?!?!??
  • One of my Great Lost Comedy Projects was the "misleadingly censored songs" with BLEEPS covering up words that were not naughty but the bleeping makes them sound so. The original inspiration for that was "I Saw Momma BLEEPing Santa Claus".
  • She was on crutches. I spy a typo.
  • Wrap yourself up and sit yourself down - Be waiting for me Christmas Evening, 'Cause little ol' Santa is comin' to town, And I'm filled with the spirit of giving! Don't use too much paper or ribbon or tape - Perhaps just a couple of bows, Strategically placed, so it's all in good taste, And come sit on my lap - ho, ho, ho! Most folks leave cookies, but this year, leave nookie; You've heard of the wink of my eye. You've been a bad girlie, so I'll be there early, And don't hang your stockings too high! I'm a jolly old elf if I say so myself, And my candy cane's sticky and sweet. I'll show you my sleigh and we'll all dash away; Did you know that it had a back seat? And you'll hear me exclaim and I drive out of sight, "I'll call you, I swear! And to all a good night!"
  • Obviously, that lady had just seen the Enzyte "Smilin' Santa" ad and was just gettin' that Holiday Feeling.
  • Brava, TUM! I'll never look at a candy cane the same way again...