September 19, 2007

It be International Talk Like a Pirate Day 2007, me' Buckos.
  • Not for another hour and a half here, but YARR, I BE FIRST TO BE COMMENTIN YARRRRRRRRRR
  • I'll kill anyone who gets in the way of me killing anyone..!
  • *silently kills all pirates with unstoppable ninja skills*
  • I used ta be all fer the Yaaars and frivolity of Talk like a Pirate Day - - until I watched, by accident, an episode of Wife Swap that featured Cap'n Slappy and his family... whoa, they take Pirattitude just a little too seriously! *adds some chum to the bucket* ARRRRRRRRRRR!
  • It comes around so fast!
  • *bestabs t' homunculus* Yar-har!
  • Yeah, I was enjoying TLaP Day today until someone called me a chumbucket. Then I had to kill them.
  • *stealthily steals tracicle's chumbukket with undetectable ninja skills*
  • NOT MAH CHUMBUKKIT!
  • YAARR! *grabs rum, puts on eyepatch, walks into door frame*
  • O noes! Thar be they stealin' me chumbukkit!
  • Word to all ye: Cap'n quidnunc I be The rappinest pirate On the seven seas Me pirate shirt be frilly Me rhymes they be sharp If ye start to get silly I'll pop a cutless in ye ARRRS WAIT: Pirate Rap is incredibly awful. I apologise - I'll never, ever do that again.
  • Humph. The whole thing just encourages wild and unneccessary bandana wearing. I will be maintaining dignified and proper naval discipline today. I might allow myself a small celebration in the memory of Robert Maynard - the scourge of Blackbeard - with perhaps a tot of rum and a keelhauling.
  • *joins h-dogg in the unstoppable ninjin'*
  • *pours, oh, pours the pirate sherry*
  • I am way too cool for Talk Like a Pirate Day. yarr
  • What did the octagenerian pirate say? "Eye'm Eighty!" my only pirate joke and I already told it on #mofirc
  • and, "... me Buckos?" What, is this the infamous Millwaukee Pirate thread?
  • Us Kokos are never more dangerous than when we're dead!
  • Finally, another Yellowbeard reference. Yarr.
  • I've got a cute earring
  • I'm not interested in your jewellery, cloth-eyes...
  • So gently we sailed o'er the bonnie blue sea: The Cap'n, Ricardo, his mother, and me. We lived on meringue and pistachio nuts And biscuits that caused us to puke up our guts. "Ahoy!" said the Cap'n (he needed no reason). "Ahoy!" cried Ricardo, 'cause whales were in season. "Ahoy!" said his mother, embracing her boy. I saw no occasion to utter "Ahoy." The Cap danced a hornpipe and talked to his parrot; Ricardo said, "Arrrrgh," 'til I hardly could bear it. Mom wore an eye patch, though eyes she had two; I found nothing vaguely piratic to do. We sat in the crow's nest when there was a storm; I wore fuzzy earmuffs to keep myself warm. The Cap and Ricardo would toss back the rum While I chewed my sugar-free peppermint gum. The Cap'n, he sacked and he burned every village. Ricardo was learning to rape and to pillage. His mother fought duels with mad buccaneers. I stayed below deck 'cause the noise hurt my ears. Our ship, she broke up 'round the Cape of Good Hope. We battened the hatches and clung to the ropes. The Cap'n went down with mournful, "Yo Ho." Ricardo and Mom were the last ones to go. Not even Lorenzo (the parrot) survived; No, I was the only one still left alive. The moral is simple, all ye who live fast, Have fun. but remember, the dull finish last.
  • YARR! TUM's be deservin' a half-cuddle, half-rape fer that!
  • "me' bucko" is dead set pyrate slange of the real sort. Anyone who has seen Amazon Women on The Moon knows this to be true.
  • "Eye'm Eighty!" *prepares keelhaul-o-matic*
  • Ahoy, ye landlubbers! Belay yer loose talk and harken to TUM's artful admonition. I tried to enlist my parrot in celebrations of the day, but he refused to get anywhere near me big ol' flintlock pistol, although he would pose on a mast hoop and a taffrail log. *lays offering of black powder in front of Robert Newton photograph in foyer* As an aside, let me note that wild and unnecessary bandana wearing can get you hassled in some quarters... I had one confiscated when I tried to bring it into an amusement park; I was told it was a "gang-related" thing. No pirate behavior permitted in Kennywood, apparently, in spite of the local baseball team being the Pittsburgh Pirates.
  • You have all disappointed me mightily.
  • Stop that man, pissin' on the thread!
  • I just want to thank you all for doing your part to halt global wAAAARRRRRHHHHming. Brought to you by the Cult of the FSM, LLC Inc. Ltd. all rights reserved.
  • Stop that man, pissin' on the thread! It's important!
  • You're a beekeeper!
  • OK, how do you "accidentally" watch a whole episode of Wife Swap? Fine. Arr.
  • ...It's Drivin' me Nuts!! Yarrrrrgh!
  • Whaarrr? I haven't seen the likes of him in a while... YARR!
  • I have a business meeting tonight, and I also own two parrots. I am tempted to bring one with me, on my shoulder. Good idea? Discuss.
  • No one there will have heard of "Talk Like a Pirate Day", and you'll stand there explaining it and ruining the joke while your parrot shrieks and shits on your shoulder. I say, go for it.
  • Is it the angel-parrot or the devil-parrot?
  • The Capt. has some mighty fine ideas there, matey. I'd say take both o'yer parrots, your eyepatch and your blunderbuss, and don't explain why you have them. That way if the other folks don't know of today's true meaning, they'll at least not get bored or lose interest in the meeting. All the more so if you be gettin' the birds to wear celestial and infernal costumes.
  • "Oh, er, these are my seeing-eye parrots."
  • OK, how do you "accidentally" watch a whole episode of Wife Swap? "Accidentally" as the cable channel lineup changed over the weekend, and the Tivo was not properly adjusted. A documentary on the local access channel was suppose to have been recorded, but I ended up with "Wife Swap". I probably would have skipped right over it, but I could not resist when I saw that it involved TLAPD founder, Cap'n Slappy. YaaaaaaaaRR mateEE!
  • Cap'n Slappy is that a real name?
  • ARRRRRRRRR!!! I have just crossed the high seas to arrrrrrrrive in Limeyland, so I have been talking like a pirate for FIVE EXTRA HOURS!!!!!! I be harrrrrrrrrrrrrrdcorre, mateys!
  • Arrrrrrrrrgh you done yet, ye bumsnogglin' barstardly bloats?
  • Come on, GramMa, what's your deal? Pirate day is sooo over.
  • Oh, and it's "Talk like a valley girl day" today. Like, totally.
  • Tubular!
  • 'Tubular', is, like, totally Thrasher-talk. Or, like, maybe even, like, Shredder-talk. It, like, comes from like a surfer etymology, like, you know? What ev r. *back-combs hair*
  • Gnarly, rad, minty, marvy, awesome, ace, fab, wicked, bad, fresh, doubleplusgood.
  • Like, to the max.
  • Gag me with a spoon!
  • Allrighty-roo jimminy! You joads and ginzos are starting to get me cheesed. Yer all futzed, and it's time for this hep-cat to do-se-do on outta here. This jukes a real flopperoo, and you're alla buncha fringers.
  • .
  • That you, BasilDrak?
  • Arrrrr.... How to type like a pirate!!! I love the 'avast' key.
  • A whole high school full of kids, and not ONE of the lil' monsters knew it was talk like a pirate day. Most of 'em didn't even know what talk like a pirate day was. I'm disillusioned with today's youth and the intarwebs.