August 31, 2007
Dear John, Your service is being terminated.
I have to say, as one who is a bit anti-cellphone, I thought this was pretty humorous.
I know, it's probably old news to most of you but I just ran across it yesterday. I find it quite hilarious. Of course, most companies like this have less than stellar customer service, so I'm not surprised that they have constant complainers. That being said, most people are a little too addicted to their stupid phones. Generally speaking, the concept of quality across the board has been watered down so much, whether in customer service, electronics, whatever, that for those who have certain expectations and keep demanding that those expectations be met; plan on getting dumped. "The customer is always right" idea hasn't been around for some time.
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A little more detail.
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Either Sprint has some really bad customers that just call to [sic] often or maybe they should take a look into just why so many calls were needed in the first place. It's the former.
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In my experience, it's the latter.
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Send him a text, Rex; Call his machine, Jean; Pick up your cell, Nell; Just listen to me. Send an IM, Clem; Don't need to talk live, Clive; Leave a voicemail, Gail, And set yourself free.
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Conversation I just had less than thirty minutes ago: Disgruntled Dad: You haven't done anything for my son. Me: What do you mean? DD: I hired you to take care of his case, and next thing I know you are pleading him to felonies. Me: I went to court with your son and got him a Deferred Prosecution. The case would have been dismissed in one year if he would have complied with the judgment. He did not. I went back to court with him for the violation of the terms of the Deferred Prosecution and was able to convince the judge to extend the terms of the Deferred Prosecution and not enter judgment. Then he violated the terms of that Deferred Prosecution agreement. At that point, the judge entered judgment. I am not sure what you mean when you say I didn't do anything for him. DD: Well, we paid you money and now he has a felony. Thanks for nothing. Disgruntled Dad is by no means the only person like that in the world. I wish I were rolling in it enough that I could just ditch my clients like that. Good for Sprint for being able to.
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It's true. Many end users of technology have this "OMFG You're HaX0riNg My Webz!" approach to tech problems. And they refuse to RTFM (or its FAQtional equivalent), so they just keep calling and threatening. When each call costs, let's say $10, and there's 500,000 of those calls per month - it adds up. Providing excellent phone support is one thing and Sprint should be doing that. But yeah, some customers are "worth" firing. Y'know now that we're on the topic, I'm afraid word has come down from Mr. Tricycle that you're all to be let go at the end of the thread. I'm very sorry. Please take any personal items with you as those items left behind will be mashed up into some horrible trash muncher, besmelling of sulphur and yak dung.
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I have to wonder, too. Is it the customer who calls every other day with a billing issue that turns out to be a non-issue? I had at first wondered whether this was a letter to one troublemaker customer, which got blown up into "customers", but the second link quotes a Sprint rep as saying they sent them out to multiple customers. Bad PR, but it's true in a way. If a customer calls in and calls in and calls in, and you can't resolve his problem, he probably will be happier somewhere else.
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Ah, so you're going to try to make my stuff smell better?
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Also, I think this is part of what I really see as a bigger debate. Nearly every business you go to these days has cut staff, including probably most of our workplaces. Business tend to see employee salaries as their highest expense, and the cutting thereof (by cutting staff or limiting the amount of human service they're willing to give) as the easiest impact to their bottom line. But are businesses being shortsighted to assume that they can impact customer service and not lose more money than they saved? Or since every business is along for the ride, will consumers eventually just settle for less and less?
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Sprint sucks. They just jerked my girlfriend around with a huge rate increase way before her contract renews. So guess who isn't renewing, jerks. She figured it out, and she'll save more money canceling early and switching than waiting and not taking a hit on the penalty. Told 'em so, too, and they were all for the good offers THEN! She told 'em to where to put it. But so does AT&T or Cingular or whateverthehell they're calling themselves today. I HATE with the passionate white hot heat of a 1000 suns dealing with these jerks. For that matter, just about anybody--phone, power, net service provider, banks, car repair, doctor's billing offices, et al. Your elevator music sucks, and yes, I DO mind waiting on hold. If you're always recording my calls for "quality assurance" how come you can't ever remember the problem you said you'd resolve, and why do I have to remind you of the date, the time, the operator, and the issue? But AT&T is special: My mistake: It's gonna cost me. Their mistake: It's gonna cost me. Whooops, lady, just suck it!
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*fans self*
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Wait, wait, wait, back up. GramMa has a girlfriend?
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I have a friend. Actually, I have many friends. One of them is a girl. We do not foot-tap together. Evar. gedoverit
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Sure. Take all the fun out of it. Can I still have cupcakes?
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I'm just not in the mood to frost cupcakes today. How about a bran muffin chock full of raisins?