August 29, 2007

Rich bitch? Leona Helmsley, who died last week, leaves her dog "Trouble" $12mil.

And in a smug self-congratulatory note, I totally guessed the Post's headline of "Rich Bitch".

posted by Capt. Renault 16 years ago
  • From what I hear, she also stiffed some of her grandkids.
  • If I had money, I'd leave it in trust for Mr. Whiskers's upkeep after I'm gone. The people I leave behind could theoretically make their own money, while he'd need someone to look after him. Maybe she didn;t trust any of her heir to properly take care of the pup.
  • Sadly, money alone will not ensure good care for the dog. No matter how fat the bank account, without a trustworthy human advocate for the dog, any caretakers will be highly suspect. Where's the accountability? Money has a way of tainting things, turning family members against each other and evoking greed in otherwise reasonable humans. Sure am glad I'm not rich! Uh, that last was a joke. Really. Now, where do I sign up to mind the pup?
  • Waddawanna bet that dogs gonna live a long long loong life? (And that is NOT a GramMa grammar error--I meant scouts are out looking for a younger replacement as we speak!)
  • Yeah I don't like people either but goddamn ding-dong y'know? Jeebus.
  • *puts on white Maltese costume*
  • *collects burlap sack, brick*
  • I left money (not a lot) for my now-deceased cat, Ypres. She had a trustee and everything. I did it because I knew that her death would be at the top of my family's list of things to do after I died. She was a remarkable, well-respected, certifiable monster. RIP, little Yp.
  • There should be a law enforcing distribution of all estates to the spouse, and if no spouse, to the children evenly with reasonable allowances for pets and special family members. That would curb a huge chunk of asshattery and feuding and put an end to pet snails inheriting a person's entire estate.
  • Well I've just written a living will, and I've left 12,000,000 dead dogs to my money. Hopefully the stink of rotting dog will keep those goddam tax authority people off-a my precious, precious wonga. If that doesn't work, I'm going to leave those goddam tax authority people my herpes. So fuck YOU, socialism.
  • I think you'd do better with a 422-C divisified pre-kaplooey whale carcass. Here, have a pamphlet.
  • I'm setting up a trust leaving $100,000 to my toaster. I love Lil' Toasty. He always toasted my bread just right. 
  • Nothing is more admirable than the fortitude with which millionaires tolerate the disadvantages of their wealth.
    --Rex Stout (1886 - 1975)
  • Well done, Pete!
  • She would lick the dog tongue to tongue... Straight 'outta the ever-dependable NY Daily News
  • The housekeeper, Zamfira Sfara, 48, had sued her employer in 2004 over one of those bites, but lost the case when a judge ruled Helmsley was protected from liability under the Workers Compensation Law. Sfara's son, Remus Pop, told The New York Times this week that his mother was asking lawyers to look at going after Trouble's inheritance. "That is the next step," Pop told the Times. "That dog got money. That money is going to be taken away from that dog." Yes, it's all in the smash new musical, "@$%hole's A-poppin'"!
  • Lawyers put bite on dog. News at six.
  • Grammatical trainwreck enjoins lawsuit, gawkers agog, squawkers flogged.
  • You looking for Trouble? Try Florida.
  • Heh. The BBC said "bitch".
  • Such ruff language!
  • The bulk of Helmsley's estate, 5-8B, to go to other dogs. [NYT] Also, Trouble's security detail now running at 100K p/a.
  • The first goal [of her "Mission Statement" signed in 2003] was to help indigent people, the second to provide for the care and welfare of dogs. A year later, she deleted the first goal. Lovely touch. I also like the part about how her grandkids are required to "sign in" when visiting their dad's grave in order to get their $10 MM inheritances.
  • Personally, I'm opposed to the whole idea of inheritance. Aside from a few family heirlooms with a capped maximum value, all assets should be liquidated and used for public good. This type of disgusting situation is the worst case result of a faulty system. Sometimes the intentions of the deceased should be ignored.
  • And with that single comment, Rocket88 gave up all future hopes for becoming the Republican candidate for President of the United States.