May 29, 2007
On writing well.
At the beginning of his 1946 essay “Politics and the English Language,” George Orwell made clear that he thought the language had become disheveled and decadent. Intending shock, Orwell offered five examples of subliterate prose by known writers. But these selections don’t look as ghastly to us as they did to Orwell, because language is so much worse today.
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I think that kind of misrepresents the Orwell piece. He says his examples are only slightly worse than average, not the worst he could quote: but they still look bad to me, especially the first two. I have to say my sympathy is not wholly with either Leo or Orwell. Interestingly, one of the guidelines Orwell proposes is 'never use the passive'. My own impression is that the application of this rule has done more harm than good in recent years. Of course Orwell gives himself a get-out - "Break any of these rules sooner than say anything outright barbarous". So what exactly the fuck does 'barbarous' mean, Georgie, you master of lucidity?
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AAAAAND it's the Proscriptionists vs the Descriptionists once again!! Yup, language is goin' straight to hell, waddayagonna do abowdit? As much as I hate to agree with Orwell, it oughtta be a law that politicians should never NEVER ever be allowed to use the passive voice. Mistakes were made. Make the bastards own up to what mistakes were made and exactly WHO MADE THEM.
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Great read, HW, and it sums up a lot of my own feelings about the written language. When I'm editing for my bosses I often have to sit them down and ask them what the heck they're actually trying to say. More often than not they're able to express it reasonably clearly in speech but just can't translate that into writing.
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The thing is, I think the assumption in all pieces like this is that the problem of bad prose is a matter of language, which can be cured by grammatical rules and so on. But it ain't necessarily so. The people in Orwell's examples write badly because their ideas are vague, or because they are pretentious idiots. The cure is to stop being a pretentious idiot, otherwise you'll always write like one, no matter how many rules you follow. You might not say 'Mistakes were made', but you'll say 'the situation generated mistakes' or some other piece of rubbish. Also, Orwell encourages everyone to make up their own original metaphors. Noooo! Can you imagine what fresh hell would break out if they did? If you can't handle a tired cliché properly, what godawful clotted mess are you going to come up with when you try to be original? I do like Orwell generally, though I suspect a man with such a horrid moustache cannot be altogether on the side of the angels.
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If you can't handle a tired cliché properly, what godawful clotted mess are you going to come up with when you try to be original? That's not really the point. Just because you CAN handle a tired cliche properly doesn't mean you should use it. Snore. The best writer at my paper is a master of the original metaphor -- and that's exactly what makes him so damn good.
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Also, Orwell encourages everyone to make up their own original metaphors. Noooo! Can you imagine what fresh hell would break out if they did? If you can't handle a tired cliché properly, what godawful clotted mess are you going to come up with when you try to be original? Language would become a stirfried omlette made of elephant eggs, or a glorious starfish sent into space.
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The people in Orwell's examples write badly because their ideas are vague, or because they are pretentious idiots. The cure is to stop being a pretentious idiot, otherwise you'll always write like one, no matter how many rules you follow. You might not say 'Mistakes were made', but you'll say 'the situation generated mistakes' or some other piece of rubbish. That's a great point, but skeezy politicians and Orwell's examples aside, there are plenty of cases of people just clumsily chucking words about in a vain attempt to make themselves sound smarter.
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glorious starfish sent into space oh christ spare us that tired old saw
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MonkeyFilter: just clumsily chucking words about in a vain attempt to make themselves sound smarter. Take a bow, TUM
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*announcer voice* Previously, on MonkeyFilter . . . Heh. That's fun!
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Ay-fucking-men. I've said it before, will say it again. P.C. is B.S.
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Which is just what you whorl-heads would say.
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Nickdanger, I bow to your superior language skills.
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oh christ spare us that tired old saw Metafunny! Jeers!
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OMG, your all idoits!! Learn to right!1!!