February 04, 2007

• *pre-emptively bookmarks thread*
• A baby sling is great at the start. Then a method of "wearing" your baby, as he gets more alert and curious. These are better than a baby carrier, because that tires out your back. No current links, sorry. A sense of humor. Get one now, if you don't already have one. You will need to laugh at his attempts to make your care for him difficult. A changing table, or table top, with a rail or some method to keep him from suddenly rolling off onto the floor when you least expect it. You may wish to tell this baby that you will put him out at the curb for baby pick-up if he does not stop crying, as long as you do not actually call up the gypsies. Ear plugs. Seriously. If it is your turn to sleep, this is what you need. Or, if you have a crying baby on your arm, this is a way to stay sane. Lots of cloths, for clean up and "anti-burp." Lots of simple clothing, as there will be days when five or six changes will be needed. Keep it simple, make it fun. Also, beware that one day he will *fling* himself from your arms. You are not a bad dad for dropping your baby, just don't let it happen again,
• Rent "The great Santini."
• Get a proper stroller (or "pram") with a basket for carrying your gear. I had a huge stroller with two drink holders (for me), a basket, and a reclining baby compartment that permitted the baby to sleep. Babies require so much gear, and having something you can push that will hold everything is so important, especially if you tend to walk to get places.
• I second the recommendation of some type of sling; they're very handy. We got one that's like a pouch and used it when our son was very small. There's a carrier called "Ergo" that's very good and distributes weight effectively (important with a 15 kilo toddler). If you get a pushchair/stroller/pram that reclines flat, this can serve as the baby's cot in the early months. If the compartment detaches from the wheels, even better. You'll need some chairs - one for eating in and one for sitting/sleeping in. You'll also need some way to prop the baby up in the bath until s/he is sturdy enough to stay upright. Some sort of monitor is useful. I initially hooked up a web cam with an old laptop so we could check on the baby. This was only useful with a decent amount of light. Eventually, we found a cheap video monitor with infrared. It's very reassuring to be able to see the baby and the video monitor means your less likely to wake him/her up. If you're in the UK, I think Boots carries an inexpensive video monitor.
• Travel systems are great, and after baby outgrows the capsule the stroller will last until the baby is big enough to walk everywhere (and per nunia you can buy systems that have large baskets underneath and trays and cup/bottleholders by the handle. I recommend the Maya Wrap for slings -- I've used one for my daughter and you can even nurse a baby in privacy with them, and they're strong enough to use as a hip or back carrier for a toddler. I bet you could get one on eBay. If you'd rather get a frontpack, the Baby Bjorn seems to be popular in the US. I have never had a changing table; instead I used a mat on the floor or on our bed. Once they're rolling over, don't leave them on the bed. My sister changed her son on a changing mat on their breakfast bar, which is a nice height. We bought one of those portacot things with the changing table-bassinet insert for our first kid, and it was useful as first a bassinet and then a playpen. We bought him a cot/crib when he was too big for the bassinet, but you may just buy a cot at the outset, or spend extra for a bassinet but it really doesn't matter. Ask around friends with kids. I have never sold any of our baby stuff; rather, I give it to neighbours and family and friends who need it. I never had trouble finding homes for barely-used baby gear. (If you were in NZ I could totally set you up.) Oh, even if you're using disposable nappies/diapers, buy a pack of the white cloth ones. They're great for lying baby on for changing or playing, and great for putting on your shoulder while burping the baby, or wiping up baby spills, or putting in your lap when you're just sitting with a dribbly teething infant. Cheap and stimulating gadgets for babies: they love high-contrast. Cut shapes out of white plastic lids, draw spiral and geometric designs on them with black marker and make a mobile to hang just above the crib, or string them across the crib until baby can reach up and pull on them. Also: kitchen sink makes perfect baby bath for the first month or two. Line with a towel to make it more comfortable. It's the right height and you have bench space for the baby-washing paraphernalia, and less room for the baby to slide around. Wet soapy babies are SLIPPERY.
• Can you stand one more story from the Underpants Family Album? In the days before baby car seats were de rigeur, a baby girl named The Underpants Monster was brought home from the hospital in a wicker laundry basket. Mom and Dad stopped off at Gramdma Monster's house on the hill on the way home. At the door, the basket handle broke off in Papa Monster's hand, and Baby Monster rolled out of the basket and down the hill toward the road. Unhurt Soft-boned Baby Monster didn't even cry, but the ER doctor offered Papa Monster a stretcher and a sedative.
• In about six months you may find a wind-up or electric swing very useful for calming a cranky baby. And yeah, get a sling - they're so simple and versatile.
• If it's a boy, then I'd like to share with you the best-named baby product in the history of creation, discovered by the currently-great-with-child missustool. I give you The Peepee Teepee for the Sprinkling WeeWee. Handy in case he tries to do an impression of Old Faithful while you're changing him.
• When the cold air hits the weewee, a reflexive fountain is triggered. Best response is a speedy change, next best is a over Mr. Proud. Funny, though, when the little boy hits himself in the face.
• Thanks all - very useful reading!!! I will be going through all info before updating you on relative success of Headsessions 2.0 !!! Gosh darn I love teh internets.
• Oh, and congratulations!
• *looks at my two wee ones running around and wreaking chaos in various forms* What? Goodness, I for one, recommend a sturdy and sound sanity! And I highly follow in the suggestions of those who have mentioned the sling type of device - - very useful, and it will save your back on many occasions. My daughter slept in a "hammock" for her first five months... tethered between the end rails of the crib... she was quite a sound sleeper with that method (you can swing them too and fro, and our pediatrician suggested that the going theory is that the natural motion of the swinging hammock mimicks the movements in the womb... yeah, you go Doc!).
• And, congrats!!
• No baby advice whatsoever, but a huge congratulations.
• Good on you for thinking recycle! Everyone has a different idea about what it comfortable in a sling. My youngest daughter was given 5!different styles--and wound up buying one of the Maya slings as everything else hurt her back. Get the swing. Get the kind that you can recline for an infant. Must have, seriously. It will save you many many tears. Wind that puppy up and relax. If you get the kind with the tunes, don't start playing them until the baby is about 4 months--you'll have plenty of time to get sick of them, and at 4 months, it's like a whole new thing for the baby that they'll love to listen to and swing in for ages. Get one of those lap pellows. Great for nursing, holding baby without tiring arms and saving backs, propping baby, short parent naps, whatever. Learn how to roll baby in a taco wrap. A very few don't like this, but most LOVE to be swaddled tightly. Second on the geometric shapes! Gar-in-teed baby will love them above all else. You can pay a fortune for them, or just print them off, cut them out, paste them back to back, and hang on a string. Make these patterns. My daughter thought they were boring black and white ugly, too, but her baby would stare at them for hours after her eyes were starting to focus. They were Lila's favorite--miles ahead of the expensive wind-ups with tunes. MonkeyFilter: Wet soapy babies are SLIPPERY.
• most LOVE to be swaddled tightly. My son was one of the few who didn't like it. I tried the baby burrito, but he hated it. As soon as he was born, he wanted his limbs flailing, and he would accept nothing else. Another great, great item to have is a breast pump, if your wife intends to breastfeed. Get the battery-operated kind. Having something that will bring instant relief to rock-hard, engorged breasts will make life a lot nicer on the wife.
• Ask around, it's really easy to pick a lot of this stuff up from relatives, acquaintances, etc. Obviously this is geographically inconvenient, but (for example) anyone who asked could take a good pram and a high chair off me right now.
• Cheers. No advice other than what I've heard from friends and family acquaintances with babies: 'sleep as much as you can when you're a childless couple, for when a baby arrives, you won't have have much chance to rest for years...'
• Children are bullshit. I've just spent a couple days with a friend and her two-year-old son, and he was absolutely useless - didn't have a job, couldn't speak English, just sat around the house all day shitting his pants. Also I think he had some kinda weird Oedipal thing for his Mom, he was always grabbing her bazoongas. I say get a dog instead.
• Congratulations! Hmm. Baby stuff: Try not to rush out and buy *everything* all at once. There's a huge informal parent network out there that cycles stuff round and round -- if you don't have any friends who already have children then go along to the nearest NCT event. You might find that a full 'travel system' doesn't really fit your lifestyle; they tend to be heavier than dedicated pushchairs for a start, so if you're going to be lugging the thing up and down steps (into the house say) then you might want to consider getting a separate car seat and folding pushchair. We bought a Jane Matrix & a Maclaren Techno which made a good combination (the Jane goes flat in the car, so if they're asleep you can just take them out in the seat and carry them straight inside). I guess I should evangalise cloth nappies: especially if you plan on having any *more* children after this one they'll save you a ton of money for a small amount of extra effort (washing and drying the things basically). Again, the parents network (or ebay) can be a great source of cheap second hand nappies if you don't want to buy new (or just want to try them out). Charity shops are a great source of pristine clothes for babies; toddlers tend to wear stuff out so you end up buying new for them but babies just sit around :) (I'd like to evangalise breast-feeding support too, but this can be a touchy subject for blokes to get involved in! Bug me if you {or your partner} want any references.)
• Oh, come on! Why does that have to be left for me to do..? Monkeyfilter: something that will bring instant relief to rock-hard, engorged breasts. Sheesh.
• I'd like to evangalise breast-feeding *wonders if pharm means evaginate*
• I had to go and look that word up...but no, turning breasts "inside out by eversion of an inner surface" wasn't really what I meant!
• Also- diaper service companies are wonderful things . You can hand them bags filled with stinky poopy diapers and they give you nice clean ones back! Make broad hints that this would make a great shower gift.
• Again - great to come back from work and find so many helpful peop0e out there. Not to get gooey but we had our first "kick" - well, she did anyway. Going back to Pharm's comments about National Childbirth Trust : it was like joining the Masons to get in round where we are (Somewhere on the Outer Spiral of South London) - we ended up begging so they put on e4xtra classes for us. We felt like we'd let "cub" down before it had been born! Maybe I'll do some kind of blog to keep all of you well wishers appraised of my hideous cloven-hoofed betentacled spawn. Thanks again all.
• Erk. When we went to NCT classes before the first one, they'd gone all 'encounter-groupy', much to the disgust of the woman who ran our class who was forced to keep saying 'and how does everyone feel about x/y/z' after every new nugget of information. She obviously didn't want to, so she just churned out the same stock two phrases over and over again — it drove me up the wall, although I think I managed to restrain my eye-rolling instincts. Maybe they've gone back to being more 'normal' since, but at the time it felt like being in group therapy, which wasn't exactly what we were after. It's the NCT bring and buy sale events you want :)
• Wow, lots of new little Monkeys in the last year or so! I third the swing vote. Baby Minda25 slept in the thing for the first couple of months, and now I put her in it every morning so she can drink her bottle while I get ready (and so I can strap her in so she's not playing in the cat box while I'm getting ready). I can't tell you how useful this item has been, and how glad I am that it was one of the things we made sure was in the budget. Definitely check out the used baby-stuff stores. We didn't, and after we bought everything new, we remembered to go there, and just about cried for all the money we wasted. Be prepared for a baby with long, killer fingernails. We put socks over her hands for the first day, until we got up the courage to clip her nails. I liked having the baby bath with it's little hammock for newborns. I've only tried the sink bath once, and found it to be too slippery for comfort. I have to admit, though, that I gave up on the sink bath easily, since we already had the baby bath. Mylicon. The store brand works fine, too (is Target in the UK?). Baby Minda25 had an icky tummy, and once we found out about this & started using it, she calmed down a lot. I was afraid she'd be on the stuff forever, but by five or so months (maybe a little earlier), she stopped needing it. Everything else has been mentioned. Congratulations, and best of luck to you! :o)
• when my niece was newborn my sister couldn't bear the thought of scissors near her (sharp, pointy nailed) little fingers, so she bit her daughters' nails to keep them trimmed!
• Yes, I know someone who bit her son's fingernails. This is the same mother who sucked the snot out of his nose when he was sick. So, just...no. We cut our kids' nails after they had been fed and were dozing. Less scary. Buy special baby nail scissors which have rounded ends on the blades to minimise accidents by nervous parents. Socks are good too, especially if your baby scratches at night, which our firstborn did. He got eczema on his face and it itched, but he was shredding his skin in his sleep, poor guy.
• This is the same mother who sucked the snot out of his nose when he was sick. My friend from Guam did that. Grossest thing I ever saw a mother do to her child.
• Almost daily, I see mothers climb down their SUV and basically lick their kids' cheeks so they are clean, as they leave'em at school. But that snot thing... well, if it were a very small baby, I'm his father and he's suffocating, well. Otherwise... *acckkk* Scissors and baby fingers. One of the reasons I'm not getting one anytime soon...
• Perhaps I am naive, but re EarWax's initial comment, I was under the impression that babies do not cry all the time unless they are colicky. In the US, lots of parents seem to like this thing for newborns called a Pack & Play, made by Graco... it's a convertible device that can be used as a travel playpen for slightly older babies, but for newborns, is best used as a bed or changing area. It's my goal to not have any useful baby advice until my late 30s. The more I contemplate motherhood, the more I think I prefer dogs to babies.
• Oh, that sounded awful. I'm sorry, Headsessions - I don't hate babies or anything. Congratulations on yours! I just think that my dog, who I really love, and who I will probably have to give to my mom if I ever have a kid, is as much as I can handle right now. :)
• It's incredibly lame to reply three times in a row to one thread, I know. But I had to add, re what Flagpole said suggesting something along the lines of, "Well, maybe if it's my kid and the poor thing is suffocating to death"... haven't these snot-sucking parents ever discovered those little rubber bulb things that do the job for them in a far less disgusting way? 'Cause, I mean... there is some money that is just not worth saving.
• Hi minda25!
• I don't know why it annoys me so much when parents insist on changing their kids' clothes every time they get the weensiest bit dirty, but it does. What's a spot of juice or milk or even mud here or there? Short of abject filth or infectious waste, aren't kids meant to be a bit dirty? All my friends with preschoolers constantly whinge about the amount of laundry they "have" to do every day, and then deliberately create more.
• TUM: Yep, even in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, sprogs only get a new change of clothes every second day, unless they are covered in poop or whatnot.
• Kids shouldn't be kept pristine and sterile because they need to build up immunities. I'm not sure about preschoolers vs newborns, though... the newborns definitely only need to have their diapers changed often, but the preschoolers tend to get themselves covered with food. Still, I can't imagine why the parents "have" to do so much laundry every day? None of my friend with toddlers, even when they tried to keep them relatively clean, did laundry more than like twice a week, and that was only for the ones who were kinda broke and didn't have enough clothes? I know a family that let their kid (age 3) run around in a t-shirt and diaper most of the time, and they did laundry maybe every ten days to two weeks.
• Hi quid! :o) Those booger bulbs don't work well at all. Still, though, I absolutely will NOT suck the snot out of Abigail's nose. Ewwwwwwwwww! I change Abigail's clothes if she spits up and it stinks, if she's managed to get the bottle to leak over most of whatever she's wearing, and if she pulls a dish full of blue cheese dressing off the table and into her lap. As these kinds of things happen often, she usually goes through a couple of outfits every day. About crying, babies don't have to be colicky to cry a lot. I think a lot of babies have icky tummies without it being colic (as did Abigail), and even more are unhappy about being out of the womb. Actual colic is hell, as nothing will calm the baby. One theory I heard is that a colicky baby is actually an over-stimulated baby, a baby who can't yet handle any stimulus at all. I've read a few horror stories, which convinced me that even though we had a very hard time of it with Abigail for the first three or so months, we were in Utopia compared to those dealing with colic.
• Meh, it's entirely possible that I just run into a lot of crazy-neatniks. The crazy-something-nik to not-crazy-something-nik ratio is prety high in this town.
• Somebody calling me? Or was it kit?
• Monkeyfilter: Those booger bulbs don't work well at all
• MonkeyFilter: most LOVE to be swaddled tightly MonkeyFilter: Short of abject filth or infectious waste, aren't they meant to be a bit dirty? MonkeyFilter: hideous cloven-hoofed betentacled spawn So true, all of it. bring instant relief to rock-hard, engorged breasts beat me to it, you rascal
• This, of course. And, MCT insists, this.
• Ah, crap. That first link should be to here.
• since it's vaguely relevant, dear friends just "popped" yesterday, a beautiful healthy daughter. just thinking of the pregnant monkeys :D
• posted by hillbillyswamp at 01:52AM UTC on March 21, 2007 You're supposed to be working on your goddamn freelance story to feed and clothe your goddamn unborn son, not prancing around on goddamn MoFi and staying up too goddamn late and then complaining about how goddamn tired you are the next day but then I guess you're just SO GODDAMN PREGNANT so you can do whatever you goddamn well want to. Goddamn it.
• > Cheap and stimulating gadgets for babies: they love high-contrast. Some ready-to-print ones here: http://www.envisagedesign.com/ohbaby/infstim/graphics.html There's a PDF that contains all of them.
• Go for the Hypno-Disc.
• posted by middleclasstool at 04:39AM UTC on March 21, 2007 Don't curse! @$%}{oL31
• It's only you who's banned from cursing, Churchy LaFemme.
• Dagnabbit, Albert!
• Thank you for "Churchy LaFemme."
• Hey, I dunno for a fact but I'm pretty sure it's a rule that new dads have to be nice for some period of time. And just cause the Tools are redneck hillbilly mountain people with hoppin' toadmouth disease, and a macintosh, doesn't mean they need to be all sweary and spreadin' teh bad viB3z, man. Now c'mere and let me get the rest of those crabs off of you, DJ Poosquisher.
• Monkeyfilter: Redneck hillbilly mountain people with hoppin' toadmouth disease.
• and a macintosh Euuwwwww. *scoots to other end of bench*
• Thank you for "Churchy LaFemme." Credit goes to Homer Simpson for that one.
• I like it when we talk quietly like this, don't you?
• Thank you for "Churchy LaFemme." Credit goes to Homer Simpson for that one. Surely to Walt Kelly?
• ssh. fish tick is listening. you know how she gets when we whisper.
• Arrrrrrrrrrr.
• oh noes run away
• Is that a pirate-hatted lowly worm??
• I ♥ Richard Scarry.
• You silly buggers! Where's that dang bee to support me? It's a sad day when Canadians have to slap you people about with your own cultural history.
• There she goes again. Quick, who has her medicines?
• I never got into Pogo, but apparently the Simpsons writers did.
• Well I'll be ding dangled
• MonkeyFilter: Go for the Hypno-Disc. Hypno-Disc is good for all your Monkey needs
• Eating Beef in Pregnancy Linked to Reduced Sperm in Adult Sons Probably no worries but y'know. Try the fish red beans.
• Meaningless study. Males old enough to produce AND legally able to agree to "contribute" = 18 minimum. Does your mother remember what she ate last week? What about 20 years ago? (of course, my mother made everything on a strict schedule, so every Monday (etc) was the same as every other Monday) Of course, it's too late now.
• Well it was people eating beef 7 days a week. In some countries that's everyday! That's a lotta beef even for the average meat eater, I think.
• IM IN UR BEEF LOWERING YOUR BOY'S SPERM COUNT
• So should we eat more beef or less? I'm confused.
• "More than seven beef meals a week"? I mean I love me a good slab of prime rib and all, but damn.
• > Does your mother remember what she ate last week? > What about 20 years ago? I can remember what I ate on a weekly basis 20 years ago; probably, my mother could as well. We had a standard weekly menu at home, as I think a lot of families do. Mothers were likely to either define and/or were responsible for the production of the menu, so I'd expect their recollection to be quite good. As a teenager, until I became a veggie and cooked for myself, my dinners were: Sunday - chicken, Monday - beef, Tuesday - pork, Wednesday - eggs, Thursday - pork, Friday - fish, Saturday - beef.
• Monday, meat and potatoes. Tuesday, meat and potatoes. Wednesday, meat and potatoes. Thursday, meat and potatoes until 1983, thereafter spaghetti. Friday, fish, sandwiches. Saturday, burgers and fries. Sunday, meat and fires. Rinse, lather, repeat.
• Friday, fish Another Papist is outed!
• A steady diet of Morningstar burgers and oven-baked Tater Tots turns you into an Unperpants Monster. Don't say you weren't warned.
• *scribbles additions to "Why I love The Underpants Monster" list*
• In Europe, the use of these natural and synthetic hormones has been banned since 1988. Our cows may be mad, but they will not mess with your sperm count.

• Friday, fish

  Another Papist is outed!

  Oh yes. That'd be my upbringing... Came back to this thread to recommend something like this: bouncy chair from Baby Bjorn. We've found with jnryk2 that this sort of chair is fantastic - the baba bounces up and down while he's lively, then sleeps when he wants to, or plays with his teething stuff while mommy occupies herself with his big brother. Honestly, this chair is working very very well. No special need to get the baby bjorn one, except that it's certified up to a decent body weight (maybe 12 kg). We borrowed a different one for jnryk1 but it was only certified up to 8 kg or so.
• Re-reading what I wrote (a mistake, I know), I want to add this: These bouncy chairs act as some sort of "daytime cot" insofar as the child is comfy and secure, and s/he can sleep if necessary or can play with hand toys as given to her/him.
• *sighs for the want of a bouncy chair