December 17, 2006

Gentlemen: Soy beans are making you gay and shrinking your penis. This public service message brought to you by Jim Rutz, nutritionist, chronicler of the miraculous, and former Amway distributor.
posted by RalphTheDog 17 years ago
  • I always did like roasted soybeans, haha.
  • Is this an encouragement to eat them, then, or a warning?
  • So eat Viagra. Problem solved. Next!
  • After 25 years of veganism and ten years living in Asia, my cock is now actually indented. Be warned!
  • I'm saddened to think of all the peer pressure that will be placed on all the gay carnivores to convert to vegetarianism.
  • What a fuckin' shit-for-brains loser. Thanks for the contribution to Ignorance and Fear, we were so short of it. Eating Soy Will Not "Make You Gay", You Ignorant Shit-for-Brains Fuckstick Okay, I added some of that on there.
  • So this means the last twenty five years have been in vain, and I am doomed to eternal heterosexuality? I will never listen to a Bad Scientist again!
  • So that's what's doing it!! (I thought it was too much weed.)
  • I hereby proclaim across the internets that a small penis will henceforth be known as "Tofu Cock"
  • /fark
  • MonkeyFilter: Tofu Cock Punch.
  • It's true. Since I started eating tofu my penile tissues have shrunk. ps, I"M NOT GAY ps,ps,I"M NOT GAY
  • Does this mean I can start drinking the fluoridated water again?
  • So does that mean that everyone over in Asia has Teh Gay? You know, since they eat lots of tofu and soy sauce and all that.
  • Population of China: 1,306,313,812 Population of Japan: 127,417,244 Considering the difficulty of purchasing turkey basters I doubt that is the case jaypro22. (See also Mr Gomichild - Asian and not teh gay as far as I know.) (~_^)
  • I'd be more afraid of estrogen if I didn't know that testosterone has surprisingly little effect on the brain. Hell, the majority of testosterone effects on the brain are caused by estrogen - because T is converted into estrogen in the brain. (Google "aromatase" if you want to learn more.) All you manly manly men? Heads FULL of estrogen. Get over yourselves.
  • bitch!
  • WOW!!!!!!!! A vegetable that contains actual human hormones!!! Now that's genetic engineering! I had no idea that this was possible. I mean, gee: all those bubba's gettin naked with cows in the dark may actually produce children some day. This is really amazing.
  • Well, it gives us a new catty euphemism, anyway. Instead of saying something like "I bet he really likes Judy Garland, if you know what I mean," or "I think he bats for the other team, if you know what I mean," we can say, "He looks like he eats a lot of soy products, if you catch my drift."
  • *sigh* yes it does. Which is exactly why that fucker deserves a pop in the face. From Jesus. Like I don't put up with enough fucking goddamned bullshit from my naked cowfucking shit-smelling friends, relations, and assorted online cloven-hooved sumbitches. Goddamnit.
  • Soy [...] commonly leads to a decrease in the size of the penis, sexual confusion and homosexuality
    So if one were, say, a well-endowed happily bisexual dude, does that mean he should eat more tofu, or less? I am soy confused.
  • Actually, I don't care if people eat more or less tofu, but since soy is a main source of protein it can be important in going vegetablarian. Once one gives up swallowing mechanically slaughtered animals, it's basically soy, wheat (gluten), beans or some other plant-based food to supply the protein, and to have this sort of bullshit floating around for the gullible and cruel to reference just makes another wall of ignorance to kick down and there's already enough of that.